And I'm not exaggerating. I just spent an entire phone conversation with my husband recapping the technological wonders that I was graced with thanks to Attack of the Show and Spike TV's coverage of CES 2012. I could hear his eyes glazing over and his attention span waning. He eventually gave me a polite "fuck this, I'm out" and we hung up.
I immediately forgot all about him and turned back to the t.v, Twitter, Facebook, and C|net. I pulled myself away long enough to evaluate the massive level of douche in my actions and considered it rude of him to dismiss my excitement.
I think I need help.
But have you seen the new HP Ultrabook? The wireless router that Asus is turning out? DID YOU KNOW THERE WILL BE ROBOTS?! OMFG! Unfortunately, Bieber is endorsing the robots in question, which turns me off a little -- but not enough to un-glue myself from the t.v tomorrow.
I can't wait to scour every corner that my available media choices will let me. CES is always like my Christmas. I always hate my tech gear for about a month afterward, but it's worth it to see what the future holds.
OMFG RAZER GAMING TABLET! Total nerdgasm, right there. That thing looks fucking sick!
I'm tweeting my excitement, and boring my friends on Facebook. I will most likely blog again when I see something that makes me have to change my pants. Enjoy delving into the little-known corner of my life -- complete nerd.
09 January 2012
Cooking Like A Pro On A Budget
Isn't as easy as it sounds. I recently dropped hella cash on tuition and stupid house insurance and taxes and life and my hours got cut at work, so I'm broke. I mean, I'm not exaggerating -- I'm brooooooke.
But, we still have to eat around here, and I am not into the whole hamburger helper scene, so I have to plan two weeks worth of meals and make an iron-clad shopping list that sticks to an even tighter budget. It's not that I can't do it, because I do, it's that it's really hard to find quality ingredients when your friendly commissary is three hours away. That leaves local stores and Walmart to get me through the rough times.
Without an arsenal of hoarded coupons, I usually manage to save around $150 every two weeks on the essentials. There's no junk food or packaged snacks. Everything we have here is 96% homemade. I even make potato chips and tortilla chips myself. Yeah, that broke.
So, in order to showcase my mad shopping skills and the meals that result, here is my two week plan that started Thursday of last week:
Meals:
-Chicken in wild mushroom cream sauce, wild rice & barley, fresh green beans & almonds sauteed in olive oil.
-Spinach, Italian sausage, and mushroom pizza with a mozzarella, feta, and parmigiana cheese blend.
-BBQ shredded chicken sandwiches and veggie pasta salad -- broccoli, carrots, Chinese cabbage, baby corn, fresh green peas, and squash.
-Taco Night -- ground beef tacos with green leaf lettuce, fresh green onions, black bean and white corn salsa, sour cream, taco blend cheese, and tortilla chips.
-Butterbeans and cornbread with ham for the pork eaters in the family.
-Spaghetti with homemade sauce and spinach vermicelli, garlic bread, and mixed green salad.
-Fresh rosemary & garlic baked chicken with mashed potatoes, gravy, and grilled asparagus.
-Fresh green bean casserole with salad and homemade french bread -- includes ground beef.
-Fend-For-Yourself-Night (essentially leftover night, because I hate wasting food) several times.
-Four-cheese pizza with mixed green salad.
So, that's a lot of food; all of which is pretty impressive. I set myself a $150 budget for two weeks of groceries. I have a lot of it at the house already, so I usually just buy up the fresh veggies and fruits, dairy products, and odds and ends I will need to make meals.
I went to Walmart and Dill's this time. I skipped Bi-Lo because they just didn't have the things I needed on sale, even with the Bonus Card. I spent $76 at Walmart with a savings of $126 off the original price, and I spent around $20 at Dill's with a savings of $26. That brings two weeks worth of groceries down to under $100 and I didn't use one coupon. I even bought a few little things that I really didn't need, like my beef teriyaki noodles and two cans of Pringles.
Okay, okay, I'm pretty much bragging on my skills, but I know if I can make it work, more people in my situation can make it work. Things are going to pick back up, but my budgeting is always the same. I cut corners like they're illegal to make sure there's always a little extra. A cushion is always nice.
I've already made the spinach pizza and tonight is the chicken in wild mushroom sauce. I really hope the rest of the next two weeks is flavorful enough to keep everyone happy.
But, we still have to eat around here, and I am not into the whole hamburger helper scene, so I have to plan two weeks worth of meals and make an iron-clad shopping list that sticks to an even tighter budget. It's not that I can't do it, because I do, it's that it's really hard to find quality ingredients when your friendly commissary is three hours away. That leaves local stores and Walmart to get me through the rough times.
Without an arsenal of hoarded coupons, I usually manage to save around $150 every two weeks on the essentials. There's no junk food or packaged snacks. Everything we have here is 96% homemade. I even make potato chips and tortilla chips myself. Yeah, that broke.
So, in order to showcase my mad shopping skills and the meals that result, here is my two week plan that started Thursday of last week:
Meals:
-Chicken in wild mushroom cream sauce, wild rice & barley, fresh green beans & almonds sauteed in olive oil.
-Spinach, Italian sausage, and mushroom pizza with a mozzarella, feta, and parmigiana cheese blend.
-BBQ shredded chicken sandwiches and veggie pasta salad -- broccoli, carrots, Chinese cabbage, baby corn, fresh green peas, and squash.
-Taco Night -- ground beef tacos with green leaf lettuce, fresh green onions, black bean and white corn salsa, sour cream, taco blend cheese, and tortilla chips.
-Butterbeans and cornbread with ham for the pork eaters in the family.
-Spaghetti with homemade sauce and spinach vermicelli, garlic bread, and mixed green salad.
-Fresh rosemary & garlic baked chicken with mashed potatoes, gravy, and grilled asparagus.
-Fresh green bean casserole with salad and homemade french bread -- includes ground beef.
-Fend-For-Yourself-Night (essentially leftover night, because I hate wasting food) several times.
-Four-cheese pizza with mixed green salad.
So, that's a lot of food; all of which is pretty impressive. I set myself a $150 budget for two weeks of groceries. I have a lot of it at the house already, so I usually just buy up the fresh veggies and fruits, dairy products, and odds and ends I will need to make meals.
I went to Walmart and Dill's this time. I skipped Bi-Lo because they just didn't have the things I needed on sale, even with the Bonus Card. I spent $76 at Walmart with a savings of $126 off the original price, and I spent around $20 at Dill's with a savings of $26. That brings two weeks worth of groceries down to under $100 and I didn't use one coupon. I even bought a few little things that I really didn't need, like my beef teriyaki noodles and two cans of Pringles.
Okay, okay, I'm pretty much bragging on my skills, but I know if I can make it work, more people in my situation can make it work. Things are going to pick back up, but my budgeting is always the same. I cut corners like they're illegal to make sure there's always a little extra. A cushion is always nice.
I've already made the spinach pizza and tonight is the chicken in wild mushroom sauce. I really hope the rest of the next two weeks is flavorful enough to keep everyone happy.
07 January 2012
Happy Birthday, Old Man!
Today.. well, yesterday as of 13 minutes ago, is my husband's birthday. This is only the second time in the entire time we've known each other that we've been apart for it. I'm not sure how I feel about this.. I'm usually cooking his favourite meal, his favourite cake/cookies, and trying to keep the Munchkin from tearing his present open before he gets home.
It makes me sad to know that he worked all day and went to his apartment and was alone.. probably not eating anything because he's too cheap to buy anything/too lazy..
That, and the fact I found some things I had bought to cook for him while he was here on vacation that I totally forgot and now I feel like the world's worst wife because they're some of his favourite things.
Today was a rough day, but I did get the materials to register for yet another round of education. I am really hoping that this time I will finally be happy with my career choice. Maybe after trying Journalism, Marketing, CNA/CMA, Bartending, and Phlebotomy, Veterinarian Assistance will be where I'm happy. Let's hope that this bachelor's degree is the last one because, let's face it, school is costing me too much now.
So, Happy Birthday, Husband; now that you're old, I will still be here nagging and taking care of you. I love you more than you will ever know, though even I don't know why. I guess you're just a lucky man.
And, because I love myself as well, congratulations to me for making the decision to yet again drown in a sea of book, notes, used pens, and endless sleepless nights writing papers for the sake of higher education. I think I'm going to change my "works at" section on Facebook to "Career Student".
It makes me sad to know that he worked all day and went to his apartment and was alone.. probably not eating anything because he's too cheap to buy anything/too lazy..
That, and the fact I found some things I had bought to cook for him while he was here on vacation that I totally forgot and now I feel like the world's worst wife because they're some of his favourite things.
Today was a rough day, but I did get the materials to register for yet another round of education. I am really hoping that this time I will finally be happy with my career choice. Maybe after trying Journalism, Marketing, CNA/CMA, Bartending, and Phlebotomy, Veterinarian Assistance will be where I'm happy. Let's hope that this bachelor's degree is the last one because, let's face it, school is costing me too much now.
So, Happy Birthday, Husband; now that you're old, I will still be here nagging and taking care of you. I love you more than you will ever know, though even I don't know why. I guess you're just a lucky man.
And, because I love myself as well, congratulations to me for making the decision to yet again drown in a sea of book, notes, used pens, and endless sleepless nights writing papers for the sake of higher education. I think I'm going to change my "works at" section on Facebook to "Career Student".
05 January 2012
I Have No Life.
Really. I don't.
I take care of the bill paying and the housekeeping and the keeping everyone sane, but I really don't have any semblance of a life. I just spent hours trolling Google Images, making random meme photos on a generator site, and creating my own iGoogle theme.
All my friends live in my computer. I don't go out anymore, I rarely talk to anyone, and I stay in my pajamas until someone complains that I really shouldn't go out in public in a paint-stained PT shirt and boxers.
I mean, it's not that my friends don't exist or I don't have any, I just never go out and do things with them. I can't even have an actual date with Husband that's normal. We go to the hardware store and maybe get something to eat; we're usually home by 8:30 and in bed by 10.
That sounds so completely lame and I think I'll just go resume the fetal position now. I mean, even the Munchkin seems to think it's normal to throw on boots and a coat and go play outside in her pajamas now.
Someone save me. Please. Before I make another meme picture...
I take care of the bill paying and the housekeeping and the keeping everyone sane, but I really don't have any semblance of a life. I just spent hours trolling Google Images, making random meme photos on a generator site, and creating my own iGoogle theme.
I think it's awesome, but then again, I suck.
All my friends live in my computer. I don't go out anymore, I rarely talk to anyone, and I stay in my pajamas until someone complains that I really shouldn't go out in public in a paint-stained PT shirt and boxers.
I mean, it's not that my friends don't exist or I don't have any, I just never go out and do things with them. I can't even have an actual date with Husband that's normal. We go to the hardware store and maybe get something to eat; we're usually home by 8:30 and in bed by 10.
That sounds so completely lame and I think I'll just go resume the fetal position now. I mean, even the Munchkin seems to think it's normal to throw on boots and a coat and go play outside in her pajamas now.
Someone save me. Please. Before I make another meme picture...
bro cat likes to party
oh, obama.. make your own goddamned sammich.
and my favourite by far...
dumbass...
Seriously.. do you really think I should be doing this at 3 in the morning?
04 January 2012
Neglect: My Blog Has It
I haven't posted a real, honest-to-god blog in, oh, forever. Well, more like forever, three weeks, and two days. I figure I should probably start doing things right again so I will stop having conversations with my cat and randomly bursting into tears in the shower...
Stop being all judge-y. I feel you being judge-y. It makes me itch.
Here's the slim of what I've been up to for the better part of a year and some days. Enjoy.
1. Living in Louisiana is probably one of the worst fucking things to ever happen to me in the history of fucking ever. I'm so not kidding. Aside from amazing friends, that's about all I got out of that experience. My marriage almost failed, my in-laws pretty much made me want to befriend the Mississippi River.. from the bridge.. like, I wanted to face-plant into it from the fucking bridge. Oh, and did I mention it was so awful that I wanted to punch baby seals with my fist? Because I did. A lot. Because is sucked. Immensely.
2. I finished school and couldn't get a job because, yay, the hospital chucked my paperwork into the garbage. This fact, coupled with the fact that the job market in the area we were living in was complete bullshit, made me even more down and depress-y. I was already down because of the fact that I lived in the gooch of the world; let's add on a really crap-tastic healthcare system and failing local economy. Thanks, universe. Fuck you very much.
3. I decided to move, and, thankfully, my amazing husband was supportive and decided after finishing up the jobs he was already contracted out to do, he would follow me into the great known of my home state/town. So far, so good. I love living here. My kid loves living here. My husband is so stoked to live here in the next two weeks. We're those retarded happy people that I usually make fun of now only we're broke.
4. Moving really helped everything, to be honest. My marriage is better than ever, my kid is happier and healthier than she's been since we moved from here the first time, my Mom is healthier and happier having me as her slave, err, I mean having me close-at-hand... under her roof... no, this doesn't bother me in the least because I have the coolest fucking Mom ever, and living with her is pretty much like living with a bad-ass, older version of me.. and taller... and dorkier... but still.
5. I really don't have a 5, but I am extremely OCD, and I really like odd numbers. Especially when they're multiples of 5. They make-ah me happy...ah. Whatever.
So, in conclusion, here's what we should be taking away from this post. In multiples of 5. Again. Redundancy FTW!:
-I hate the entire state of Louisiana and most of Mississippi. Fuck those places.
-I moved. Georgia = my favourite place to live.. and stuff.
-I like Ass-hat more than I've liked him since the three month mark of our coexistence as married people.
-I have a really awesome kid who's really fucking awesome.. also, My Mom is tall.
-I like odd numbers and multiples of 5.
Thanks.
Stop being all judge-y. I feel you being judge-y. It makes me itch.
Here's the slim of what I've been up to for the better part of a year and some days. Enjoy.
1. Living in Louisiana is probably one of the worst fucking things to ever happen to me in the history of fucking ever. I'm so not kidding. Aside from amazing friends, that's about all I got out of that experience. My marriage almost failed, my in-laws pretty much made me want to befriend the Mississippi River.. from the bridge.. like, I wanted to face-plant into it from the fucking bridge. Oh, and did I mention it was so awful that I wanted to punch baby seals with my fist? Because I did. A lot. Because is sucked. Immensely.
2. I finished school and couldn't get a job because, yay, the hospital chucked my paperwork into the garbage. This fact, coupled with the fact that the job market in the area we were living in was complete bullshit, made me even more down and depress-y. I was already down because of the fact that I lived in the gooch of the world; let's add on a really crap-tastic healthcare system and failing local economy. Thanks, universe. Fuck you very much.
3. I decided to move, and, thankfully, my amazing husband was supportive and decided after finishing up the jobs he was already contracted out to do, he would follow me into the great known of my home state/town. So far, so good. I love living here. My kid loves living here. My husband is so stoked to live here in the next two weeks. We're those retarded happy people that I usually make fun of now only we're broke.
4. Moving really helped everything, to be honest. My marriage is better than ever, my kid is happier and healthier than she's been since we moved from here the first time, my Mom is healthier and happier having me as her slave, err, I mean having me close-at-hand... under her roof... no, this doesn't bother me in the least because I have the coolest fucking Mom ever, and living with her is pretty much like living with a bad-ass, older version of me.. and taller... and dorkier... but still.
5. I really don't have a 5, but I am extremely OCD, and I really like odd numbers. Especially when they're multiples of 5. They make-ah me happy...ah. Whatever.
So, in conclusion, here's what we should be taking away from this post. In multiples of 5. Again. Redundancy FTW!:
-I hate the entire state of Louisiana and most of Mississippi. Fuck those places.
-I moved. Georgia = my favourite place to live.. and stuff.
-I like Ass-hat more than I've liked him since the three month mark of our coexistence as married people.
-I have a really awesome kid who's really fucking awesome.. also, My Mom is tall.
-I like odd numbers and multiples of 5.
Thanks.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)