Snacking On Crac-- Err, Jalapeno Cream Cheese Awesomeness

I once told someone that I would start blogging about the random things I've created/cooked in my kitchen.

Once again, I failed to do so.. over and over and over. Did you read my post about why I totally suck ass at blogging? Because this -- this right here -- is why. I'm a failure. Obviously.

Promotion, Lots Of Cooking, Rant Articles, And Stuff: RTTR

Another late RTTR post. I know, I suck. Get over it. I had stuff to do. Also, I had a nap to take. That was awesome, I'm not gonna lie.

Anyhow, I got a promotion. It's awesome. I'm not just a writer anymore, I'm Managing Editor. What? I know, right?! I'm cheesing just writing it. I have so many awesome ideas, and it seems like I'm constantly writing them down. They just come to me.. I don't know. Whatever.

My last article? It's gotten a lot of attention. I guess people really like when they get to read someone else ranting away. I just get so mad when people do stupid shit. Like, really, if you want to say you're obsessed with zombies, at least know something about them. And Tim Burton stuff.. I swear, the next time someone sits there and says they're obsessed with The Nightmare Before Christmas and Tim Burton's work, I'm going to die. Or dragon kick the shit out of them. It's so annoying. If you like it, cool. Say that. Don't be like "OMFGIMTOTALLYOBSESSEDANDILOVEALLOFTHETHINGS!!!!"

Be honest with yourself. Also, don't talk about it in front of me. When I contradict you, and you get pissed off, it makes me really sad for you. If you're going to fan girl all over something, learn about it first. That's all I'm asking.

I've been doing some pretty amazing cooking lately, I'm not even gonna lie. I've made barbecue chicken that will blow your mind, lots of yummy pasta salad, anything I can put spinach in, great spaghetti and pizzas, and I made some ridiculously awesome parmesan crusted chicken breasts, that were probably the greatest things ever the other night.. err.. last night? Anyway... moving on, since I just completely blanked out on what all I've made lately..

Kiddo has been driving me nuts. I can't wait until the three stage is over. I wish I had the terrible two's back.. so hard.. omg. She refuses to listen to me, and is mean as shit until Husband gets home. When he gets home, she's good for him. I hate being the least favourite parent. It blows. At least the cat loves me.. and even he gets pissy when he thinks I'm not going to remember to give him his second scoop of food before bed. I can't catch a break.

I seriously think I married a dumbass. He walked past me, just now, with his ass hanging out of his shorts. I hate that shit. He knows this. So what does he do when I tell him to pull them up? He comes back out with them around his knees and asks me who I was talking to.

Someone, anyone, husband for sale. You can have him.

This concludes Random Tuesday Rebellion, and all the fun that's had with it. Tune in next week for more fun and shenanigans. Also, don't forget to check out our leader, Stacy, for more awesomeness and bloggy goodness.

Happy Randoming and Rebelling, y'all!

Cooking Like A Pro On A Budget

Isn't as easy as it sounds. I recently dropped hella cash on tuition and stupid house insurance and taxes and life and my hours got cut at work, so I'm broke. I mean, I'm not exaggerating -- I'm brooooooke.

But, we still have to eat around here, and I am not into the whole hamburger helper scene, so I have to plan two weeks worth of meals and make an iron-clad shopping list that sticks to an even tighter budget. It's not that I can't do it, because I do, it's that it's really hard to find quality ingredients when your friendly commissary is three hours away. That leaves local stores and Walmart to get me through the rough times.

Without an arsenal of hoarded coupons, I usually manage to save around $150 every two weeks on the essentials. There's no junk food or packaged snacks. Everything we have here is 96% homemade. I even make potato chips and tortilla chips myself. Yeah, that broke.

So, in order to showcase my mad shopping skills and the meals that result, here is my two week plan that started Thursday of last week:

Meals:
-Chicken in wild mushroom cream sauce, wild rice & barley, fresh green beans & almonds sauteed in olive oil.
-Spinach, Italian sausage, and mushroom pizza with a mozzarella, feta, and parmigiana cheese blend.
-BBQ shredded chicken sandwiches and veggie pasta salad -- broccoli, carrots, Chinese cabbage, baby corn,  fresh green peas, and squash.
-Taco Night -- ground beef tacos with green leaf lettuce, fresh green onions, black bean and white corn salsa, sour cream, taco blend cheese, and tortilla chips.
-Butterbeans and cornbread with ham for the pork eaters in the family.
-Spaghetti with homemade sauce and spinach vermicelli, garlic bread, and mixed green salad.
-Fresh rosemary & garlic baked chicken with mashed potatoes, gravy, and grilled asparagus.
-Fresh green bean casserole with salad and homemade french bread -- includes ground beef.
-Fend-For-Yourself-Night (essentially leftover night, because I hate wasting food) several times.
-Four-cheese pizza with mixed green salad.

So, that's a lot of food; all of which is pretty impressive. I set myself a $150 budget for two weeks of groceries. I have a lot of it at the house already, so I usually just buy up the fresh veggies and fruits, dairy products, and odds and ends I will need to make meals.

I went to Walmart and Dill's this time. I skipped Bi-Lo because they just didn't have the things I needed on sale, even with the Bonus Card. I spent $76 at Walmart with a savings of $126 off the original price, and I spent around $20 at Dill's with a savings of $26. That brings two weeks worth of groceries down to under $100 and I didn't use one coupon. I even bought a few little things that I really didn't need, like my beef teriyaki noodles and two cans of Pringles.

Okay, okay, I'm pretty much bragging on my skills, but I know if I can make it work, more people in my situation can make it work. Things are going to pick back up, but my budgeting is always the same. I cut corners like they're illegal to make sure there's always a little extra. A cushion is always nice.

I've already made the spinach pizza and tonight is the chicken in wild mushroom sauce. I really hope the rest of the next two weeks is flavorful enough to keep everyone happy.