tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55127268969717469862024-02-07T12:29:00.337-05:00blog-like coutureIt's about as fancy as cornbread and milk, and just as tasty.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.comBlogger80125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-88683770467833923202012-09-05T18:05:00.003-04:002012-09-05T18:05:51.014-04:00The InevitableWow. It's been crazy lately.<br />
<br />
I think working three jobs--plus having other obligations, a kid in pre-k and cheerleading practice, and being completely addicted to Tums and Red Bull--makes for a miserable time.<br />
<br />
I've recently relieved a lot of stress, and I'm getting on the hunt for a better job that I can work by itself and still bank at. I closed my business for now, because breaking even sucks, and the economy isn't exactly wondermous right now.<br />
<br />
With that being said, here's a little sad news for the people who actually like me:<br />
<br />
I'm on an indefinite hiatus from the interwebz.<br />
<br />
Look, people fucking suck. They're judgemental and rude. Real life is crazy enough without having to deal with internet insanity.<br />
<br />
But I digress; I've gotten off the subject...<br />
<br />
But, yeah, anyhow, I'm on break. I've got to deal with all my real-life shit first, and as you can CLEARLY see, I haven't exactly had the spare time to blog lately. My ulcer and my lack of sleep have finally caught up with me, and with that, I bid you farewell, my awesome reader-friends.<br />
<br />
Duck-face Duces! <3Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-33056104993454775802012-07-03T13:33:00.000-04:002012-07-03T13:33:33.139-04:00The Week That I Disappeared...Err, Didn't Have InternetSo, I'm in Louisiana.<br />
<br />
It still sucks.<br />
<br />
I haven't had internet. At all. OMFG. My truck needs a new right ass cheek, my kid has Strep, and I'm working on salvaging my marriage.<br />
<br />
Also, rescued a kitten. Go me.<br />
<a name='more'></a><br />
<br />
It's been a hell of a week and a few days to say the least. I'm broke, stuck, tired, and probably going to be stuck in the fetal position if I curl up in the corner anymore.<br />
<br />
<br />
For anyone that actually missed me, have no fear, for I have returned to the real world! I am finally reunited with my most favourite thing ever -- the internet.<br />
<br />
I can answer emails, check the bank balance, order the part to fix the starter on my Mom's car, and watch my Netflix. All is right with the world.<br />
<br />
Also, last week, I wrote over at Mama Pop, and it went a little something like this:<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.mamapop.com/2012/06/don-grady-dies-and-a-part-of-my-childhood-goes-with-him.html" target="_blank">Former Mousketeer And 'My Three Sons' Star Don Grady Dies, Along With Part Of My Childhood</a><br />
<br />
I had a sad. A big one. But, anyhow, back to the grind!<br />
<br />
Carry on with your day!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-18345902234267288002012-06-21T14:19:00.000-04:002012-06-21T14:19:45.975-04:00The Week Everything Hated MeThat would be THIS week.<br />
<br />
Have you ever had one of those days where nothing went right and everything went wrong and you wanted to die but you couldn't and even your sentences were long and drawn out and incoherent?<br />
<br />
My whole week has been like that, only it's not over yet. I've been contemplating digging a hole for my head because it works for large birds and I'm sure it could work for me...right?<br />
<a name='more'></a><br />
<br />
Monday was full of cleaning and running around to get ready for my grandmother's surgery. I was so tired I could barely stand up when it was all said and done, and I'm just really thankful my sister watched the kiddo for me. I'm sure the kiddo was thankful, too, because she's been pretty bored around here lately. Mostly because <a href="http://blog-likecouture.blogspot.com/2012/06/you-drive-me-crazy.html" target="_blank">she still doesn't have all of her toys back</a>.<br />
<br />
Tuesday was surgery day, and if you'd like to see pictures, just ask my Mom. She's amazed by them...something about technology? I don't know. I don't care, either. Torn muscles and shaved arthritis don't make me all excited and giggly.<br />
<br />
Tuesday was also a day of sitting at the hospital doing nothing but waiting. I hate hospitals. I can work in one all day and not be bothered, but having to be there for any other reason makes me miserable. Again, thanks go out to my sister for wrangling my Munchkin.<br />
<br />
Wednesday was...shit. Total shit. I crawled into bed late in the morning, woke up about an hour later, and the day got worse from there.<br />
<br />
Since my truck was 30 minutes away in Athens, I had to take my Mom's car to pick up the kiddo. And, because my luck sucks and obviously I didn't have anything better to do, the starter messed up. I was stuck at my sister's all day. Nothing would get that thing to start. NOTHING.<br />
<br />
Well, when I say nothing, I really mean nothing while I was there would make it start. It started up just fine after I got home, took care of some things for my grandparents, and wanted to take a nap. THEN it started. It was delivered back home, and plans were made to fix it today.<br />
<br />
Today? Today was the PT meeting. Today was also another day of no sleep. It's now time to get everything ready for the trip to Louisiana, which includes doing stuff to BOTH vehicles, running errands, doing laundry, helping out as much as I can so my Grampa and my Mom don't have as much to do, and possibly hiding in my closet again with wine and Xanax.<br />
<br />
Don't act like you don't do it, too.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Also, today over at Mama Pop, I wrote a little something about CBS being cray-cray: <a href="http://www.mamapop.com/2012/06/dancing-on-the-stars-is-an-actual-thing.html" target="_blank">'Dancing on the Stars' Is An Actual Thing</a><br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-76118872099423270992012-06-15T11:41:00.001-04:002012-06-21T14:23:00.357-04:00That Time I Hit The Life LotterySo <a href="http://blog-likecouture.blogspot.com/2012/06/why-ill-never-go-shopping-again.html" target="_blank">THIS happened</a>, and I've since gone on to bigger and better things. I've still yet to do all the other shit I'm supposed to do for my grandmother, but I'm assuming I'll start on that today.<br />
<br />
"Other shit" is just a nice way to put "scrub her entire house clean from top to bottom and get myself a pat on the head." Oh, and stuff from the garden. And sometimes a little cash. Both are awesome.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXvJKXtqKcTVt1Gz_vWS2BrO3aGrLLWrIOt6mR0CZ0M5wfUVzLNAudr1i3e3N6SAOkwXI_oTD8tKLS1JpvMQPekl8Y8woj-2_fQ5lUTjE1oqeGtlMGfFiOOHCVk0E1QtKiQ8j8hhY8xWI/s1600/veggies-and-cash.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="224" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXvJKXtqKcTVt1Gz_vWS2BrO3aGrLLWrIOt6mR0CZ0M5wfUVzLNAudr1i3e3N6SAOkwXI_oTD8tKLS1JpvMQPekl8Y8woj-2_fQ5lUTjE1oqeGtlMGfFiOOHCVk0E1QtKiQ8j8hhY8xWI/s320/veggies-and-cash.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Lincoln is a pretty true-to-life image...</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<a name='more'></a><br />
<br />
Now, I know I'm being a complainer here, but this is the only place I do it. In the reals, I do it with a smile on my face and I'm actually pretty happy that I'm able to help out. I mean, the whole reason I moved back home was to take care of the things that need to be taken care of, right? That includes people. Lots of people. My whole damn family is getting old and senile.<br />
<br />
That shit is depressing, y'all. I happen to like my family, and this whole "aging" thing is a real drag. Funny sometimes, but mostly a drag.<br />
<br />
Anyway, moving on.<br />
<br />
The reason I haven't already been elbow-deep in old-school cleaning products and a cranky old <strike>lady</strike> cat wandering around, annoying the hell out of me, is because I've been busy WINNING THE LOTTERY! No, not the one where you get a whole bunch of money and write "Fuck You" letters to everyone you hate, but the one I like to call "The Life Lottery".<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAAn4fIp2KF5Ho5MZPPb0WR8bseoA6LgP8EUcehxVRfPJDujFYZGASVMUv8Jn417NN_wag-5glGnNtFVub0pFZR5C9AHO8MDKMrMb_zfM855Fn5ev9HzF4N3fAMU-RVDvmVRbHUIzOrjo/s1600/winning.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="299" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAAn4fIp2KF5Ho5MZPPb0WR8bseoA6LgP8EUcehxVRfPJDujFYZGASVMUv8Jn417NN_wag-5glGnNtFVub0pFZR5C9AHO8MDKMrMb_zfM855Fn5ev9HzF4N3fAMU-RVDvmVRbHUIzOrjo/s320/winning.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">YAY!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<br />
I spent all day Wednesday, and all night, scouring every entertainment news website, show, blog, train, bus, plane, and magazine, looking for something amazing to write about. Because, y'all, I have found myself living a dream!<br />
<br />
Maybe this isn't making sense.. blame the lack of sleep and coffee AND THE FACT THAT I'M SO HAPPY I COULD DIE! DIE! LITERALLY!<br />
<br />
I guess I should give a little back story, so here we go: I've always been a writer. Like, for as long as I can remember. My degree is in Journalism, and all the other crap I've gone to school for has basically been in a desperate attempt to find something I can make more money at so my kid can have a shot at being normal.<br />
<br />
I have had a ton of blogs, but this one seems to have stuck around, and I never ever EVER thought it would amount to anything. I used it to vent, and follow all the bloggers that I think are awesome. That's about it.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEge-ZhelCULMWkyx01xtoUQxbfLANapCZapW57kSU6NnKXOCirlU6X1BoCSfZLjDHgbjmeJSihM1_BB22YEiSkCBaS5DEfRLWZc38tzFMWJFtU7xBCJa32R3JN2YoZsP04pvDLCOlbdw-E/s1600/awesome-gif.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEge-ZhelCULMWkyx01xtoUQxbfLANapCZapW57kSU6NnKXOCirlU6X1BoCSfZLjDHgbjmeJSihM1_BB22YEiSkCBaS5DEfRLWZc38tzFMWJFtU7xBCJa32R3JN2YoZsP04pvDLCOlbdw-E/s320/awesome-gif.gif" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Oh, you awesome, sexy beasts, y'all!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<br />
But then, the awesome happened. People started to notice me. And they started to like me, which is odd.. not many people do.<br />
<br />
And OMFG YOU GUYS! Someone wanted me to write for them. Life lottery won. And, seriously? Nicest, most awesome people in the history of EVER. For reals.<br />
<br />
And, in a true reflection of my luck, Wednesday was suuuuuuuuuuuper crappy. I stressed and freaked out and may or may not have wound up crying in the fetal position under my desk. But, I soldiered through it, and came up with this:<br />
<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.mamapop.com/2012/06/jessica-simpson-leaves-the-gym-and-the-world-goes-nuts.html" target="_blank">Jessica Simpson Leaves The Gym And The World Goes Nuts</a><br />
<br />
<br />
You should go check it out. Also, the unicorn is possessed. Seriously. I woke up and it was laying on the other side of the bed. Staring at me.<br />
<br />
Maybe my kid is just an asshole who likes to scare the living shit right out of me.<br />
<br />
Either way, that thing HAS GOT TO GO. GOT. TO. GO!<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh05IXZAcsUwUqYozkbaEygB1z69K7VKFt3C6sEkRRPgGwJjYJAarcp2rl2FIfgwD3KdpPfe8eFn6as8isdyQx-lGQyXFO2-Adbm1e8So70uQiUWKkEkHLIvy5iQ8I-KVlrrroSY-ouUG8/s1600/fucking-unicorn.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh05IXZAcsUwUqYozkbaEygB1z69K7VKFt3C6sEkRRPgGwJjYJAarcp2rl2FIfgwD3KdpPfe8eFn6as8isdyQx-lGQyXFO2-Adbm1e8So70uQiUWKkEkHLIvy5iQ8I-KVlrrroSY-ouUG8/s320/fucking-unicorn.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Fucking unicorn.. not so majestic anymore.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<a href="http://www.google.com/imgres?hl=en&sa=X&biw=1366&bih=653&tbm=isch&prmd=imvns&tbnid=Ycmbj4BDX5sknM:&imgrefurl=http://www.prevention.com/food/healthy-eating-tips/save-money-organic-foods&docid=5krH1RNGKWUavM&imgurl=http://www.prevention.com/sites/default/files/imagecache/410px-width/organic-food-vegetables-money-0908-00-410x290_0.jpg&w=410&h=288&ei=-VHbT5SNBMrO2wXkoNDPCA&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=550&vpy=152&dur=6513&hovh=188&hovw=268&tx=158&ty=104&sig=116923197954654870940&page=2&tbnh=137&tbnw=178&start=18&ndsp=24&ved=1t:429,r:2,s:18,i:140" target="_blank">picture</a>, <a href="http://www.sodahead.com/united-states/ron-paul-winning/question-2670905/?link=ibaf&q=&imgurl=http://cdn.planetminecraft.com/files/resource_media/screenshot/1221/Winning_2326992.jpg" target="_blank">picture</a>, <a href="http://www.google.com/imgres?hl=en&sa=X&biw=1366&bih=610&tbm=isch&prmd=imvns&tbnid=4OR6b8_5YGc0FM:&imgrefurl=http://thisadvertisinglife.tumblr.com/post/23360015440&docid=EjgfRLEwIWacKM&imgurl=http://i.imgur.com/dKrG3.gif&w=500&h=282&ei=kVXbT-PKGeWU2gXhm424CA&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=675&vpy=198&dur=17&hovh=168&hovw=299&tx=162&ty=91&sig=116923197954654870940&page=1&tbnh=128&tbnw=160&start=0&ndsp=21&ved=1t:429,r:11,s:0,i:109" target="_blank">PEW!</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-42827443003422698652012-06-13T11:11:00.002-04:002012-06-13T11:13:04.603-04:00Why I'll Never Go Shopping Again<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://static.someecards.com/someecards/usercards/1335298036781_3013300.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="224" src="http://static.someecards.com/someecards/usercards/1335298036781_3013300.png" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
Yesterday sucked. The levels of fail cannot be measured or described. Here are some highlights from the worst. day. ever. for your reading pleasure, because sharing is therapy.. caring.. whatever.<br />
<a name='more'></a><br />
<br />
Here's trying to leave the driveway in <i>her</i> car because mine is "too hard of a ride":<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"I CANNOT SEE WHERE WE ARE GOING BUT OH LORD KATHRYN GO THAT WAY AND TAKE THIS TURN AND WHERE ARE WE OH JESUS WHERE ARE YOU GOING I'M SO CONFUSED AND WHY DID I LET YOU DRIVE??!"... "Oh, we're not even out of the driveway yet? Oh, okay. <i>Nevermind</i>. Carry on."</blockquote>
<br />
This continually got worse, because obviously traffic signals haven't been invented yet:<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"OHMYGOD KATHRYN YOU'RE CUTTING OFF ALL THOSE OTHER CARS WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" Did I mention I turned at the light.. the green arrow light? Yeah, that's what was happening.</blockquote>
<br />
Why she chose to sit in the back seat, I'll never know, but let me tell you folks, IT'S THE WORST PLACE FOR OLD PEOPLE EVER. EVEREVEREVER! Do NOT put your old people in the back seat. You will forever hate being in a car if you do so, and it's going to suck the life right out of you. SUCK. IT. OUT.<br />
<br />
Here's a quick apology to the hot chick working at CVS, because she deserves it:<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
Super hot lady tech at CVS in Hull, </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
I'm sorry. She's crazy. You're awesome. Take her money and smile, or she'll do that shit every single time. I've been in this nightmare for 25 years, and lemme tell you, it doesn't get better. Just.. I'm so sorry. Public internet apology will never be enough, but I'm trying. </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
Also, call me. </blockquote>
<br />
(Here's where I mention this was just the apology for the drop-off, not the pick-up.)<br />
<br />
And here's a highlight from lunch:<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"Why did we come here? I can't eat this stuff until they fix my blahblahblahh. You have terrible taste, Kathryn. Terrible." </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"Mema, you picked Taco Bell, not me. Would you like me to go get you something else?" </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"I DID NOT PICK HER-- oh, wait, yes. I want something soft. And chocolate. Something soft with chocolate. Wait, did I take my medicine this morning? Yes. Okay. I want soft, chocolate.. something. Go get it." </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
****** </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"Araelynn, if you're going to eat a taco, at least pretend you're eating something better for you. Kathryn, this child is way too excited about a taco. What do you feed her?"</blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"Mema, I'm going to damn stab you with a spork." </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"Well, I guess you ARE your father's child.. violence.. I'll call the police-man, and you'll-- hey! This pudding stuff is good." </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"I'm going to throw myself into traffic. I'll be right back."</blockquote>
<br />
There was a cigarette break here, don't judge me. I've done well in trying to quit, but DO YOU SEE THAT SHIT UP THERE?!<br />
<br />
Highlight from Kohl's:<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"I don't know if George needs more shirts, or more underwear...." </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"Mema, for real? Who wants boxers for Father's Day? At least if you're going to get a shitty gift, get him some cool boxers or speedos and tell him to model them for you. Make it exciting.. something. Jesus." </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"He has chicken legs. I'd just laugh at him." </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"I didn't need to hear that. I was kidding. Please burn my ears off, thanks." </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"MOM! YOU CAN'T BURN YOUR EARS OFF BECAUSE YOU CAN'T HAVE FIRE IN THE STORE YOU'LL BURN THAT BALD MAN OVER THERE! ... what are speedy-ohs?"</blockquote>
<br />
(Here is where I just give up and buy myself some shoes. Sale be damned, I just needed something to ease the pain.)<br />
<br />
The rest is just a blur.. I bought some shit, I pretended I was somewhere else, the kid covered the car in caramel from her apple snack, and there was a lot more bitching and yelling and I think I might have died on the inside a lot.<br />
<br />
Enjoy the rest of your week. If not for yourself, for me. Because I am still trying to get over the whole ordeal.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-42621838190790526902012-06-11T13:23:00.002-04:002012-06-11T13:23:21.666-04:00You Drive Me CrazySo, as I've probably neglected to mention in my blogging absence, my daughter turned four on Mother's Day.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5DbZSn9gqVPIbmqwXtKaetJeR_Mo8qKPKrda_CsAyNB1p-2Fve3wEeOvqVE26aMFOsil5_3nwxqog1UGcIYAn7XnTgyd3rP83I8Ht0or9fEvKYq0d-_qfphGH7W_ugG_4LI5vemMYxvg/s1600/2012-06-01+14.30.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="319" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5DbZSn9gqVPIbmqwXtKaetJeR_Mo8qKPKrda_CsAyNB1p-2Fve3wEeOvqVE26aMFOsil5_3nwxqog1UGcIYAn7XnTgyd3rP83I8Ht0or9fEvKYq0d-_qfphGH7W_ugG_4LI5vemMYxvg/s320/2012-06-01+14.30.png" width="320" /></a></div>
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<br />
Since that day, my life has gone from standard to OHMYFUCKINGGAWDSOMEONEGIVEMEAXANAXNOW. It's starting to get to me.<br />
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Now, don't get me wrong, I love my daughter more than anything in the world. She's smart, funny, easily amused, and sweet.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFOEiQzvxwUg31zn7AJlyDucB7vlMO5KoASKQOnYWYJWTB33MGY4zroao_c0I2nzdMoinA004n2CvwkwwG-5XGeYxbCyBSsY0cq9Q2F6jVM9RGzPkg9HEVO65lteY7_tL_Vi-8Bs1LXBE/s1600/AraelynnWinterPhotos_1.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFOEiQzvxwUg31zn7AJlyDucB7vlMO5KoASKQOnYWYJWTB33MGY4zroao_c0I2nzdMoinA004n2CvwkwwG-5XGeYxbCyBSsY0cq9Q2F6jVM9RGzPkg9HEVO65lteY7_tL_Vi-8Bs1LXBE/s320/AraelynnWinterPhotos_1.png" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
Okay, I lied -- she USED to be all those things. Now? She refuses to acknowledge when anyone is talking to her, she pretends like she has no clue what she's doing (even after she's done whatever task is at hand a billion times), she's mean (mostly to me, so don't worry), she can't play by herself for more than 45 seconds at a time, and she hates everything and everyone she used to love.<br />
<br />
She's become a diva. And, I say this with as much love as I can, she's driving me crazy.<br />
<br />
Like, for instance, there's a person who works the night shift in the house. Miss Diva has concluded that her normal speaking tone is "Banshee". I've resorted to begging for her to lower her voice from the closet where I'm hiding with my Xanax and my coffee mug.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEil_g3mGYUvjz5BUMlBRcymkG928rvCyC3Lv8oCS8rhitgeF69zO79691ir6XczWNK6NXMsitwXL4e1vOPLh7yOZlRp641ed32ZMxKCe4DFedw1aBL4Gr5CSKYdk2-tpuikPOPB5MM8BC8/s1600/a98192_hiding_10-2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEil_g3mGYUvjz5BUMlBRcymkG928rvCyC3Lv8oCS8rhitgeF69zO79691ir6XczWNK6NXMsitwXL4e1vOPLh7yOZlRp641ed32ZMxKCe4DFedw1aBL4Gr5CSKYdk2-tpuikPOPB5MM8BC8/s320/a98192_hiding_10-2.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Image credit given below, edited by a frantic me. In the closet. HELP!</td></tr>
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Or, let's talk bathroom time. She's been potty trained for a looooooong while. She rarely needs assistance. Well, she rarely needed assistance. Now? If I don't follow her and hover, she won't wipe. Or she'll pee in the dirty laundry basket.. or the floor. She did that last night while brushing her teeth, with me standing RIGHT THERE.<br />
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And what about meal time? That, too, is no longer easy and carefree. She hates everything, and demands popsicles, chips, cookies, cake, gummies, candy, and chocolate milk. I've even made broccoli every night (her favourite vegetable since she was old enough to munch solid food), and all she does is yell at me and try to make herself throw up.<br />
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Kids. They do the crazy things.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://thelaughingstork.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/Olivia.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="206" src="http://thelaughingstork.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/Olivia.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Oh, Toddlers And Tiaras, you no longer scare me.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
Now, I realize a lot of this has to do with the issue of my current marital status, and the fact that she's coping. She also gets mad when we aren't seeing my "brother-from-another-mother" Jon and my friend Cory every single second of the day, or even once a week, lately.<br />
<br />
But seriously? The age of four is going to be the death of me. I have tried every single method in the book, to no avail. I've tried timeout, I've tried fussing, and I've even tried taking away privileges. This shit, it doesn't work.<br />
<br />
I've since given up on anything but the "Ida Ruedell Method". My Gramma raised me with an iron fist, and if I did good, and listened, I got major rewards. I'm implementing it now, and it's kind-of helping?<br />
<br />
Example: Every day, we sit silently, hands in our laps, backs straight, and ankles crossed, for 15 minutes. If she does it, she gets one episode of her cartoon of choice, and one of her toys back. So far she's gotten two toys and two episodes of Ruby Gloom.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://failblog.files.wordpress.com/2012/06/epic-fail-photos-dating-fails-resigning-to-be-a-cat-lady-early-on-is-sad1.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="224" src="http://failblog.files.wordpress.com/2012/06/epic-fail-photos-dating-fails-resigning-to-be-a-cat-lady-early-on-is-sad1.png" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Or, probably not, because Stephen is terrified of you. The cat, he has a hidey-hole.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<br />
Now, to explain, my Gramma always tried to teach me to be a lady. She taught me to cook, sew, clean, mend, speak, entertain, and the importance of patience and listening skills. The sitting was always started with the line, "A lady always knows how to sit and wait patiently. Silence is golden, and good posture means you won't have a hump."<br />
<br />
If I was good, I got a magazine to read the next time. If I wiggled or complained, I got bopped in the back of the head and time started over. Also, I had to do twice the chores I normally did, and there was zero taste-testing when we cooked meals.<br />
<br />
The kid has nothing left to lose. She's without toys, movies, cartoons, "fun baths", and treats. It's been rainy and gross outside, so she's been inside since Saturday. I don't know what else to do.<br />
<br />
What I do know, is I have coffee, wine, and anxiety meds. And for now, that's good enough for me, because parenting ain't pretty, or easy, and you just have to roll with it.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjB_XRTPXqQ_cJ0HmXB5MdgPZBcJ9-dN5M5L0JF3yOtwIgx2RSq-nfpxzH74R65SrhyZnwTEKiTw70bqHTgmX61k9UNGNu6HmxL8WttypoPstGjU9vTLZZ-MC8r4FUw7j-OQKENBr2RZHg/s1600/1337964216891_3504700.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="224" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjB_XRTPXqQ_cJ0HmXB5MdgPZBcJ9-dN5M5L0JF3yOtwIgx2RSq-nfpxzH74R65SrhyZnwTEKiTw70bqHTgmX61k9UNGNu6HmxL8WttypoPstGjU9vTLZZ-MC8r4FUw7j-OQKENBr2RZHg/s320/1337964216891_3504700.png" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">And I have a "No Returns, No Refunds" policy.</td></tr>
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Photos that are not my own were found via a Google Image search at the following places:<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.google.com/imgres?start=250&num=10&hl=en&biw=1366&bih=610&addh=36&tbm=isch&tbnid=msbz010LBq4zsM:&imgrefurl=http://anothertiredmommy.blogspot.com/&docid=rsXe3JWrIAnEuM&itg=1&imgurl=https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjB_XRTPXqQ_cJ0HmXB5MdgPZBcJ9-dN5M5L0JF3yOtwIgx2RSq-nfpxzH74R65SrhyZnwTEKiTw70bqHTgmX61k9UNGNu6HmxL8WttypoPstGjU9vTLZZ-MC8r4FUw7j-OQKENBr2RZHg/s1600/1337964216891_3504700.png&w=420&h=294&ei=OCjWT5mkCcGe2AW04KWwDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=632&vpy=221&dur=4088&hovh=188&hovw=268&tx=124&ty=115&sig=116923197954654870940&page=10&tbnh=130&tbnw=186&ndsp=25&ved=1t:429,r:16,s:250,i:230" target="_blank">Facebook, Baby eCard</a><br />
<a href="http://www.google.com/imgres?hl=en&biw=1366&bih=610&tbm=isch&tbnid=PAfL1o2-dRIOfM:&imgrefurl=http://failblog.org/2012/06/08/dating-fails-dating-fails-resigning-to-be-a-cat-lady-early-on-is-sad/&docid=h3jNpnAHq4eQXM&imgurl=http://failblog.files.wordpress.com/2012/06/epic-fail-photos-dating-fails-resigning-to-be-a-cat-lady-early-on-is-sad1.png&w=500&h=350&ei=eSfWT_uzI8aQ2QXN5eSrDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=264&vpy=148&dur=1705&hovh=188&hovw=268&tx=154&ty=96&sig=116923197954654870940&page=1&tbnh=117&tbnw=167&start=0&ndsp=21&ved=1t:429,r:1,s:0,i:76" target="_blank">Future Cat Lady eCard</a><br />
<a href="http://www.google.com/imgres?hl=en&biw=1366&bih=653&tbm=isch&tbnid=szj1nH-Ji4mzpM:&imgrefurl=http://96rockon.com/blogs/post/alee/2012/may/24/weirdest-places-criminals-have-tried-hide/&docid=7Ilx0_Eg2UO0OM&imgurl=http://www.oddee.com/_media/imgs/articles2/a98192_hiding_10.jpg&w=450&h=300&ei=JyXWT7nnCqXi2AXUzaCbDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=369&vpy=311&dur=2749&hovh=183&hovw=275&tx=107&ty=73&sig=116923197954654870940&page=1&tbnh=140&tbnw=187&start=0&ndsp=18&ved=1t:429,r:7,s:0,i:95" target="_blank">Closet Creeper Picture, Sans Editing</a><br />
<a href="http://www.google.com/imgres?hl=en&biw=1366&bih=610&tbm=isch&tbnid=xAJpKnFKcKmtyM:&imgrefurl=http://thelaughingstork.com/blog/2011/07/21/rock-star-divas-and-dolls-pageant-what-i-learned-from-this-weeks-toddlers-tiaras/&docid=VMGCYYGMpR3zMM&imgurl=http://thelaughingstork.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/Olivia.jpg&w=580&h=374&ei=3ibWT9K1FoXw2gWMsLy6Dw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=270&vpy=319&dur=8948&hovh=180&hovw=280&tx=128&ty=114&sig=116923197954654870940&page=2&tbnh=123&tbnw=154&start=22&ndsp=29&ved=1t:429,r:23,s:22,i:221" target="_blank">Toddlers And Tiaras Still</a><br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-35996460121888469862012-06-06T12:25:00.001-04:002012-06-06T12:32:01.873-04:00This Can't Be Happening, Can It?<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://media-cache-ec6.pinterest.com/upload/284149057709858200_I1mJHQxF_f.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://media-cache-ec6.pinterest.com/upload/284149057709858200_I1mJHQxF_f.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Okay, so this one is from NASA. But OMFG. AMAZING!</td></tr>
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Last night, I watched, awe-struck, as SLOOH and NASA showed me the Transit of Venus. It was so humbling. We are so small in the grand scheme of things. I also listened intently as astronomers, physicists, and other scientists explained the significance of this event. They also talked about other amazing things out there in space, and even a brewmaster weighed in. It was just.. amazing.<br />
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Legit.<br />
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My demonic child was silent as she watched and pointed and giggled, and my Mom was annoyed at the geek squealing and sucking all the bandwidth. She totally thought it was cool, too, don't let her fool you! It was definitely a night I will always remember, and my Pinterest proves just how amazed I was (THE PICTURES. OMFG.).<br />
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BUT!<br />
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I woke up to some of the saddest news I've heard about a celebrity death ever.<br />
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<a href="http://media-cache-ec5.pinterest.com/upload/261419953340292887_nqingKMg_f.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://media-cache-ec5.pinterest.com/upload/261419953340292887_nqingKMg_f.jpg" width="232" /></a>Ray Bradbury, greatest Science Fiction writer EVER, passed away at 91. I am not even ashamed to admit that I sat, staring, at the headline, tears streaming down my face. It has officially ruined my day, and I agree with my sister: They better turn him into a robot, because life will be really depressing without his writing.<br />
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Two profound events in the course of 12 hours? The only thing I can say, is his death probably tickled him pink. The Transit of Venus won't happen again in our lifetime (next time around? 2117. 105.5 years from now.), and he died right after it? No better send-off for a Science Fiction mastermind.<br />
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I really don't have anything else to say. I've never been so affected by a "celebrity" death. I idolized him; I have every single book he's ever written; I've read them to the point of falling apart. Today truly is a time in my life that I will always remember.<br />
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The good, and the bad.<br />
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Here are some more of the amazing images I snapped off the SLOOH website last night to finish off the post I've cried throughout writing:<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://media-cache0.pinterest.com/upload/158540849352807516_YETVcQPj_f.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://media-cache0.pinterest.com/upload/158540849352807516_YETVcQPj_f.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">From the University of New Mexico. The clouds add to the beauty.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://media-cache0.pinterest.com/upload/158540849352807391_GsOc9fNb_f.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://media-cache0.pinterest.com/upload/158540849352807391_GsOc9fNb_f.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">From The Prescott Observatory in Arizona. How gorgeous is this? Right??</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://media-cache0.pinterest.com/upload/158540849352807365_1D1n0FLx_f.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://media-cache0.pinterest.com/upload/158540849352807365_1D1n0FLx_f.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">UiO, Norway. Just.. OMFG.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-87884847219176917372012-05-23T23:34:00.000-04:002012-05-23T23:57:41.831-04:00I'm Still Alive.. I Think.I could possibly be dead, or in a coma.. who knows?<br />
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Is this all just a really bad dream? Nope. I'm still here. I've just been taking some time off to do a lot of shit that I probably should'nt have.<br />
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Don't you love it when that happens?<br />
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So, let's recap the last couple of months, shall we?<br />
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<b>Thing One:</b> I've worked my ass off.. and I'm still broke. Joy! Raising a kid on your own is rough stuff. I don't know how all my single mom friends get through the first year of it without being sent to a "day spa", but since they're still trucking, I'm going to keep going and hope that shit gets better.<br />
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<b>Step Two:</b> I've watched a lot of cartoons. I really need to get out more.. and by out, I mean farther than my front porch.<br />
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<b>Stuff.. Three:</b> I've been hanging with the boys. You know, because I love them. I missed my friends, especially the one's I consider extensions of my family. I still miss my friends in the 'burg, and one in particular from Vidalia, but it's so good to be home.<br />
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<b>I Forgot.. Four:</b> I've been struggling with my anxiety. Seriously, people, I've been ready to tear my own skin off. I really need to get back on my meds before I stroke the fuck out.<br />
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<b>Umm.. Five?:</b> I hadn't realized just how far my self-loathing had progressed, but I'm on the road to recovering what I lost.. also, a huge shout-out to every single person that has been there for me when I'm a crying mess and telling myself that I'm the worst human being on the planet. Cory, that would be you. I don't know what I would've done the other night without you. Thank you, seriously.<br />
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<b>Number Six:</b> I've been losing a lot of weight. The flu and stressing over lots of medical bills really helped me out there. I'm down 26 pounds since Louisiana, and I'm hoping the rest slides off with another stomach flu or all the yard work that I've been doing.<br />
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<b>Seven? Why am I counting, again?:</b> I can <i>almost</i> look in the mirror and like myself again. I'm hoping another month will have that covered. I have like, no self-esteem left. I mean, really.. but that's a huge fuck you to the person who took it away, and a THANK YOU LAWD that I'm away from it now.<br />
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Let's just say, through all the hard shit, there has been some good shit. And through everything, I couldn't say I'd change any of my decisions. I'm not here to whine, I'm here to say that I'll be back as soon as I can think about something other than looking for a better job and how I'm going to pay the mortgage.<br />
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Sometimes, life kicks you in the balls to make you realize that this is where you're supposed to be, and what you're supposed to be doing, so you better pony up and get shit done.<br />
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I'm going to get shit done. Everything will look better in the morning, right?Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-23021336673853565912012-04-10T19:52:00.000-04:002012-04-10T19:52:37.348-04:00YouTube Channels You Should Be Subscribing To: Part I<span style="color: red;"><i>Probably the last article I will port over. Maybe.</i></span><br />
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I have the best job in the world. I get to surf the web all day, watch TV at night, and write about anything I want to. It makes me all warm and fuzzy to know that I get to share my opinions -- good or bad -- with the masses.</div>
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Also, I get to wear my pajamas most of the day. That's always a nice feeling.</div>
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Now, I love me some YouTube. It's awesome. I can get lost for hours watching videos of people popping cysts, the weirdness of "scene queens", crazy Photoshop wonders, and lame slide shows. I also get graced with things that melt faces with their extreme awesomeness. Below, a list of the awesome channels will be made for your subscribing pleasure. Fair warning, some of these channels contain strong language, opinions, and extreme hotness.It's a thing, don't judge me.</div>
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<em>Note: I was going to try to score a few interviews with the channel owners, but it didn't work out like that. Maybe sometime soon I can set something up. Until then, my vouch system will have to do.</em></div>
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<em>Also Note: I just got lost for almost an hour on Tumblr. That place is a black hole of win.. internet crack. Someone take it away!</em></div>
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<strong>Epic Meal Time</strong></div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/epic-meal-time.jpg" href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/epic-meal-time.jpg"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-thumbnail wp-image-1591" data-mce-src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/epic-meal-time-150x150.jpg" height="150" src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/epic-meal-time-150x150.jpg" style="border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; float: left;" width="150" /></a>If you want to laugh until you almost pee, this will make it happen. These guys? They're hilarious. I can see my husband making the same meals.. bacon weave? Meat ice cream parties? <a data-mce-href="http://youtu.be/Tqd8yLQIzwU" href="http://youtu.be/Tqd8yLQIzwU" target="_blank">Chinese leftover pie</a>? Yes. It's all here. And it is awesome. I follow them for constant laughs, and there hasn't been a time they haven't delivered. Also, really hot chicks chowing down on huge pieces of meat. That right there is always watchable. I finally got through all of the videos a couple of days ago, and I think I may or may not be inclined to try to make a meat gingerbread house, bacon weave, and homemade clam chowder. There are actual recipes scattered through all of the yelling and bacon, and it's easy to learn when you're constantly engaged. Sauce boss fo' life!</div>
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<strong>DeStorm</strong></div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/DeStormPower.jpg" href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/DeStormPower.jpg"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-thumbnail wp-image-1592" data-mce-src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/DeStormPower-150x150.jpg" height="150" src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/DeStormPower-150x150.jpg" style="border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; float: left;" width="150" /></a>Now, if you know me personally, or from anything I post on Twitter, you know I hate Rap. I don't like R&B, I don't like Hip Hop.. it's not my thing. There's just something about songs that talk about hoes and abbreviations that just isn't what I like to listen to. But! Oh, wow. This guy? This guy has more talent in one of his amazing fitted caps than most "rappers" have in their entire album collection. From <a data-mce-href="http://youtu.be/71FWwm5MIUg" href="http://youtu.be/71FWwm5MIUg" target="_blank">challenge videos</a>, where he sings about a user-given topic, to original songs that blow your mind, DeStorm never disappoints. I have turned on so many of my friends to his music, and they all agree that he's going places. So, "What's up world? <a data-mce-href="http://youtu.be/71FWwm5MIUg" href="http://youtu.be/71FWwm5MIUg" target="_blank">Another day, another challenge</a>."</div>
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<strong>Michelle Phan</strong></div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/MichellePhan.jpg" href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/MichellePhan.jpg"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-thumbnail wp-image-1594" data-mce-src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/MichellePhan-150x150.jpg" height="150" src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/MichellePhan-150x150.jpg" style="border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; float: left;" width="150" /></a>This one is mostly for the ladies. If you want to learn nifty <a data-mce-href="http://youtu.be/OB8nfJCOIeE" href="http://youtu.be/OB8nfJCOIeE" target="_blank">make-up tricks</a>, DIY ways to save money on every day products, the latest and greatest trends in color and application (of make-up), then you're going to want to hit the "Subscribe" button on this chick. I've never been a girly girl. I've always had trouble with my make-up, my hair, and knowing how to do the simplest things to enhance my features. I stumbled upon her channel, and the rest is history. I now know how to make my own pore strips (for pennies), cucumber <a data-mce-href="http://youtu.be/zupy7R4uR2g" href="http://youtu.be/zupy7R4uR2g" target="_blank">eye treatments</a> (that save my tired, strained eyes daily), and amazing make-up remover (with things I already keep on hand). I can also curl my hair without heat and it last for days, wear a beautiful scarf in seven different ways, and I know what kind of colors look best with my skin and eyes. Also, she gave me the tools to cosplay perfectly.</div>
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<strong>My Drunk Kitchen</strong></div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Hannah-Hart.jpg" href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Hannah-Hart.jpg"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-thumbnail wp-image-1595" data-mce-src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Hannah-Hart-150x150.jpg" height="150" src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Hannah-Hart-150x150.jpg" style="border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; float: left;" width="150" /></a>Have you ever wondered what cooking while hammered would be like? Now you don't have to! <a data-mce-href="http://youtu.be/vq7G-Q9ZwC0" href="http://youtu.be/vq7G-Q9ZwC0" target="_blank">Hannah Hart</a> is absolutely stellar at it.. kind-of. Things may not always come out right, but they always come with edible sides of laughter and fun. Watching her get plastered and try to make things like cookies, tacos, meat balls, and packaged food, will be the greatest thing you do that day. She has guests, makes music videos, does vlogs, and always looks good while she's at it. Her Twitter is pretty awesome, too. Harto fans everywhere love her, and you should too!</div>
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<strong>Dragon Age: Redemption</strong></div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/DAR.jpg" href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/DAR.jpg"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-thumbnail wp-image-1596" data-mce-src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/DAR-150x150.jpg" height="150" src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/DAR-150x150.jpg" style="border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; float: left;" width="150" /></a>Felicia Day blows it out of the water in the <a data-mce-href="http://www.youtube.com/show/dragonageredemption?s=1" href="http://www.youtube.com/show/dragonageredemption?s=1" target="_blank">Dragon Age web mini-series</a>, <a data-mce-href="http://youtu.be/-093SQo9NWM" href="http://youtu.be/-093SQo9NWM" target="_blank">Dragon Age: Redemption</a>. It's short, sweet, and to the point. I couldn't have loved it more. I was left wishing it would never end, much like her smash series The Guild, but I could watch it over and over and never get bored. If you love Dragon Age, or even if you don't, this is well worth your time to check out. They did such a good job that I find myself lost for a description. It's just something you have to see for yourself.</div>
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<strong>Jenna Marbles</strong></div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/JennaMarbles.jpg" href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/JennaMarbles.jpg"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-thumbnail wp-image-1597" data-mce-src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/JennaMarbles-150x150.jpg" height="150" src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/JennaMarbles-150x150.jpg" style="border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; float: left;" width="150" /></a><a data-mce-href="http://youtu.be/ghA5oOPE-xg" href="http://youtu.be/ghA5oOPE-xg" target="_blank">Jenna Mourney/Marbles</a> will blow your mind. She's gorgeous, honest, funny, and completely awesome in every way. She reminds me a lot of myself: sailor mouth, brutal honesty, complete obsession of her very loved <a data-mce-href="http://youtu.be/ghA5oOPE-xg" href="http://youtu.be/ghA5oOPE-xg" target="_blank">pets</a>, and great boobs. I'm a little pensive to use one of my favorite sayings, because she coined it on the internet first. I don't want to seem like a tool, so I refrain. Her videos that are uploaded on "Sexual Wednesday", and her awesome knack for putting everything in a way that people can relate to, make her channel one that you're not living right if you're living without. Her Twitter and Facebook are always good for a round of laughs as well. The Spiderman picture-love is also a really big perk, because, well, who doesn't love Spiderman?!</div>
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I am certain there are other channels out there that are awesome, but I don't care. I've found my favorites, and these are it. Every kind of humor that's worth watching on YouTube is represented. I have been all over that site and back, and have still yet to find channels I love more. I can't wait to hear the tears of laughter and joy from you guys who haven't checked them out yet. For those of you that have, you know what I mean.</div>
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Happy subscribing!</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-13726343963408794042012-04-10T19:38:00.000-04:002012-04-10T19:38:27.023-04:00The Bandwagon Is Full, So Get Off<span style="color: red;"><i>Another article I wrote at Raspwire is getting moved over. Enjoy!</i></span><br />
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Have you ever noticed all the things you love becoming fads and trends? It sucks. I notice it all the time, and it makes me sad for the people who are calling a <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&ved=0CEwQFjAC&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.urbandictionary.com%2Fdefine.php%3Fterm%3Dbandwagon&ei=KLRCT5L8C8y_2QWO9525CA&usg=AFQjCNGIggMrQjP22JOEYDWqDT52yDpXlg&sig2=PUtgMdSfzEYQdVNXsggSBw" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&ved=0CEwQFjAC&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.urbandictionary.com%2Fdefine.php%3Fterm%3Dbandwagon&ei=KLRCT5L8C8y_2QWO9525CA&usg=AFQjCNGIggMrQjP22JOEYDWqDT52yDpXlg&sig2=PUtgMdSfzEYQdVNXsggSBw" target="_blank">bandwagon</a> taxi to Trendy Town. I am using my own experiences to rant about this topic, but I'm sure there are lots of people out there that can relate. Well, actual relation may or may not be present, because some people will relate because it's the new trend.</div>
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<strong>Zombies</strong></div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/WhiteZombiePoster.jpg" href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/WhiteZombiePoster.jpg"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-full wp-image-1623" data-mce-src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/WhiteZombiePoster.jpg" height="226" src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/WhiteZombiePoster.jpg" style="border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; float: left;" width="225" /></a>I have loved <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&sqi=2&ved=0CDAQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FWhite_Zombie&ei=lsVCT_fCBarm2QX7oeioCA&usg=AFQjCNH4P1mEv3M8xXMhrheMc_xAtpQGvg&sig2=CwvlvGzhe-g-rW17t_lT0A" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&sqi=2&ved=0CDAQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FWhite_Zombie&ei=lsVCT_fCBarm2QX7oeioCA&usg=AFQjCNH4P1mEv3M8xXMhrheMc_xAtpQGvg&sig2=CwvlvGzhe-g-rW17t_lT0A" target="_blank">zombies</a> since I was seven. I sat, in awe, in front of my Mom's ancient television (that resembled a piece of furniture), and soaked up a marathon of <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Night_of_the_Living_Dead" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Night_of_the_Living_Dead" target="_blank">George A. Romero zombie films</a>. Oh, you don't know who that is? You love <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&ved=0CEQQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fzombiehunters.org%2F&ei=c8NCT-zoBMrY2QX4pYTaBw&usg=AFQjCNHTQlj_SD3XiINi-LnWEENGjFwrVA&sig2=JJyXfzkSx_3aMVsxhsqTuw" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&ved=0CEQQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fzombiehunters.org%2F&ei=c8NCT-zoBMrY2QX4pYTaBw&usg=AFQjCNHTQlj_SD3XiINi-LnWEENGjFwrVA&sig2=JJyXfzkSx_3aMVsxhsqTuw" target="_blank">zombies</a>, you say? Negative. You love the trend. If you say you love <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=5&ved=0CFsQFjAE&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.imdb.com%2Ftitle%2Ftt0080057%2F&ei=c8NCT-zoBMrY2QX4pYTaBw&usg=AFQjCNHz4vwS5ZLtTtR6E7fiKujowQwBpw&sig2=fB4eWXwTCDu-KwobSrEirQ" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=5&ved=0CFsQFjAE&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.imdb.com%2Ftitle%2Ftt0080057%2F&ei=c8NCT-zoBMrY2QX4pYTaBw&usg=AFQjCNHz4vwS5ZLtTtR6E7fiKujowQwBpw&sig2=fB4eWXwTCDu-KwobSrEirQ" target="_blank">zombie</a> films like <em>Dawn of the Dead</em>, <em>Land of the Dead</em>, etc., but you have no idea who he is, you just love <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CDkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FZombie&ei=4MJCT87gPM6J2AWgwPSACA&usg=AFQjCNHf0qpsHkArfcU9XIlbvqAs_Mlp7A&sig2=w2Gfn1oDFlmurkUr8aSx9g" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CDkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FZombie&ei=4MJCT87gPM6J2AWgwPSACA&usg=AFQjCNHf0qpsHkArfcU9XIlbvqAs_Mlp7A&sig2=w2Gfn1oDFlmurkUr8aSx9g" target="_blank">zombies</a> because you like to say you love <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&sqi=2&ved=0CEQQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.cracked.com%2Farticle_15643_5-scientific-reasons-zombie-apocalypse-could-actually-happen.html&ei=usRCT_L-DqS-2gXbx6SwCA&usg=AFQjCNGpJNpviLAKMk69mxsmmaczotf-NA&sig2=7s8a4kX1jm5cvAWv3MXTrw" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&sqi=2&ved=0CEQQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.cracked.com%2Farticle_15643_5-scientific-reasons-zombie-apocalypse-could-actually-happen.html&ei=usRCT_L-DqS-2gXbx6SwCA&usg=AFQjCNGpJNpviLAKMk69mxsmmaczotf-NA&sig2=7s8a4kX1jm5cvAWv3MXTrw" target="_blank">zombies</a>. I'm a hard-ass when it comes to things like this. George A. Romero is one of the most important people alive to the truly zombie enthused. He started most of us off with <em><a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CDcQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.imdb.com%2Ftitle%2Ftt0063350%2F&ei=X7BCT4LLBuPY2AXTiMScCA&usg=AFQjCNE3x4jqAAwpcuO7iZ0W7Zv1z3ayxA&sig2=0Bn2QL6Rbv5Sjb9TU-DtsQ" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CDcQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.imdb.com%2Ftitle%2Ftt0063350%2F&ei=X7BCT4LLBuPY2AXTiMScCA&usg=AFQjCNE3x4jqAAwpcuO7iZ0W7Zv1z3ayxA&sig2=0Bn2QL6Rbv5Sjb9TU-DtsQ" target="_blank">Night of the Living Dead</a></em>, and continued us down a twisted path of inexplicable love and longing towards brain-dead, flesh eating, <a data-mce-href="http://wp.me/p22crP-qa" href="http://wp.me/p22crP-qa" target="_blank">walking corpses</a>. If you have no clue who he is, don't sit there and say you love <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=4&ved=0CFUQFjAD&url=http%3A%2F%2Fzombies.monstrous.com%2F&ei=4MJCT87gPM6J2AWgwPSACA&usg=AFQjCNHqKqGrpQlzbpOuCkpH9oNDyVyUPQ&sig2=Y2Qkcx8gXcVMag-4b_BRYA" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=4&ved=0CFUQFjAD&url=http%3A%2F%2Fzombies.monstrous.com%2F&ei=4MJCT87gPM6J2AWgwPSACA&usg=AFQjCNHqKqGrpQlzbpOuCkpH9oNDyVyUPQ&sig2=Y2Qkcx8gXcVMag-4b_BRYA" target="_blank">zombies</a>. Also, please stop saying that you're a life-long lover. I think you can like zombies a lot, but you can't truly love them if you have no idea who the icons behind bringing them to life are. <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&sqi=2&ved=0CFIQFjAC&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.imdb.com%2Ftitle%2Ftt0077402%2F&ei=q8NCT9yfK8bo2AXA4qW3CA&usg=AFQjCNEMtd7NWIiKkpvVRHDUF9V91LsYZA&sig2=kEYi07AEimkCEH4rjLX6Rg" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&sqi=2&ved=0CFIQFjAC&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.imdb.com%2Ftitle%2Ftt0077402%2F&ei=q8NCT9yfK8bo2AXA4qW3CA&usg=AFQjCNEMtd7NWIiKkpvVRHDUF9V91LsYZA&sig2=kEYi07AEimkCEH4rjLX6Rg" target="_blank">George A. Romero</a> is just one person, and he's the most well-known. That being said, how can you not know him? How can you no know his work? How is it that you think the <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&sqi=2&ved=0CD8QFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.imdb.com%2Ftitle%2Ftt0363547%2F&ei=q8NCT9yfK8bo2AXA4qW3CA&usg=AFQjCNGygu_pJ-R_XPZO0dnz9y00tOGuNw&sig2=0y1LiXBhNgSV0nzMPNWkzw" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&sqi=2&ved=0CD8QFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.imdb.com%2Ftitle%2Ftt0363547%2F&ei=q8NCT9yfK8bo2AXA4qW3CA&usg=AFQjCNGygu_pJ-R_XPZO0dnz9y00tOGuNw&sig2=0y1LiXBhNgSV0nzMPNWkzw" target="_blank">walking dead</a> craze started with <em><a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&ved=0CEkQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FResident_Evil&ei=8rFCT8nPEuS62wW82empCA&usg=AFQjCNFjjAOs6YI_Gyrzna1jIE-PGOX-wA&sig2=GIwC0ebxql8R90f6k1G-3g" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&ved=0CEkQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FResident_Evil&ei=8rFCT8nPEuS62wW82empCA&usg=AFQjCNFjjAOs6YI_Gyrzna1jIE-PGOX-wA&sig2=GIwC0ebxql8R90f6k1G-3g" target="_blank">Resident Evil</a></em>, a game you've most likely never played, by the way, and argue with me when I contradict you?! I know I sound extremely mean, but oh well. It's ridiculous. You buy a t-shirt from Walmart, watch a little current movie marathon, and tune in to AMC every Sunday for The <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=9&sqi=2&ved=0CIEBEBYwCA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.washingtonpost.com%2Fblogs%2Fcelebritology%2Fpost%2Fwalking-dead-five-questions-about-triggerfinger%2F2012%2F02%2F19%2FgIQArIUSOR_blog.html&ei=IcRCT-mPCKnQ2AX4z-2dBA&usg=AFQjCNGYiTS8qbv7p28b8UVz0HewaHiDzw&sig2=DKRMsKqsySlBCteibqRIUw" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=9&sqi=2&ved=0CIEBEBYwCA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.washingtonpost.com%2Fblogs%2Fcelebritology%2Fpost%2Fwalking-dead-five-questions-about-triggerfinger%2F2012%2F02%2F19%2FgIQArIUSOR_blog.html&ei=IcRCT-mPCKnQ2AX4z-2dBA&usg=AFQjCNGYiTS8qbv7p28b8UVz0HewaHiDzw&sig2=DKRMsKqsySlBCteibqRIUw" target="_blank">Walking Dead</a>, and suddenly you're an aficionado? No, guy. You're not. Can you name the very first zombie film ever made? Probably not. It wasn't a Romero film, either, so don't say <em>Night of the Living Dead</em>. It was actually <em><a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=4&sqi=2&ved=0CEgQFjAD&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.imdb.com%2Ftitle%2Ftt0023694%2F&ei=lsVCT_fCBarm2QX7oeioCA&usg=AFQjCNHb6bsi3GI2T9QPhjbqUVJ55Kj78g&sig2=2W25Z4ih9l5xeo-WwQsI_Q" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=4&sqi=2&ved=0CEgQFjAD&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.imdb.com%2Ftitle%2Ftt0023694%2F&ei=lsVCT_fCBarm2QX7oeioCA&usg=AFQjCNHb6bsi3GI2T9QPhjbqUVJ55Kj78g&sig2=2W25Z4ih9l5xeo-WwQsI_Q" target="_blank">White Zombie</a></em>, which came out in 1932. Bam. I didn't even have to Google that. You still think you're America's Next Top <a data-mce-href="http://wp.me/p22crP-qa" href="http://wp.me/p22crP-qa" target="_blank">Zombie Lover</a>? You just got cut, yo. Come back when you actually know more about <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&sqi=2&ved=0CE4QFjAC&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FThe_Walking_Dead_(TV_series)&ei=IcRCT-mPCKnQ2AX4z-2dBA&usg=AFQjCNFKRXCOfDz9tds7oDcNglUihtUiRw&sig2=-ioJhFL6U7d9F2Z0Hw4CEA" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&sqi=2&ved=0CE4QFjAC&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FThe_Walking_Dead_(TV_series)&ei=IcRCT-mPCKnQ2AX4z-2dBA&usg=AFQjCNFKRXCOfDz9tds7oDcNglUihtUiRw&sig2=-ioJhFL6U7d9F2Z0Hw4CEA" target="_blank">zombies</a> than what you find on someone's Twitter feed.</div>
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<strong>Vampires</strong></div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/lulzEC.jpg" href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/lulzEC.jpg"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-thumbnail wp-image-1624" data-mce-src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/lulzEC-150x150.jpg" height="150" src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/lulzEC-150x150.jpg" style="border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; float: left;" width="150" /></a>Have you ever seen anything other than the atrocious <em><a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&sqi=2&ved=0CDUQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.imdb.com%2Ftitle%2Ftt1099212%2F&ei=icpCT6-mBY_82gXd-cCmCA&usg=AFQjCNE38e7iebT5Dpw1j-fw35XtMsSegQ&sig2=aL5fA_Hw4TLpT41vTONi2Q" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&sqi=2&ved=0CDUQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.imdb.com%2Ftitle%2Ftt1099212%2F&ei=icpCT6-mBY_82gXd-cCmCA&usg=AFQjCNE38e7iebT5Dpw1j-fw35XtMsSegQ&sig2=aL5fA_Hw4TLpT41vTONi2Q" target="_blank">Twilight</a></em>, <em><a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&sqi=2&ved=0CDQQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.hbo.com%2Ftrue-blood%2Findex.html&ei=pcpCT87FL4TO2AXw9dGqCA&usg=AFQjCNFLErGJuLaUBIwvpJsBOwTVGkghXA&sig2=FHn4zNN1nNSA5OgL2QPArg" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&sqi=2&ved=0CDQQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.hbo.com%2Ftrue-blood%2Findex.html&ei=pcpCT87FL4TO2AXw9dGqCA&usg=AFQjCNFLErGJuLaUBIwvpJsBOwTVGkghXA&sig2=FHn4zNN1nNSA5OgL2QPArg" target="_blank">True Blood</a></em>, or <em><a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&sqi=2&ved=0CDcQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.cwtv.com%2Fshows%2Fthe-vampire-diaries&ei=vcpCT7_5K4S62wXq3PWpCA&usg=AFQjCNHR6ZXM9uPTNPLZ0g7id6zzzV5tMQ&sig2=PhT6iaZTwruRmr5n_YTDiA" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&sqi=2&ved=0CDcQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.cwtv.com%2Fshows%2Fthe-vampire-diaries&ei=vcpCT7_5K4S62wXq3PWpCA&usg=AFQjCNHR6ZXM9uPTNPLZ0g7id6zzzV5tMQ&sig2=PhT6iaZTwruRmr5n_YTDiA" target="_blank">The Vampire Diaries</a></em>? Most likely not. Ever read Dracula? Yeah, right. I can't even really rant on this, because it renders me completely speechless. If you think Edward friggin' Cullen is a <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&ved=0CEoQFjAC&url=http%3A%2F%2Fvampirewebsite.net%2F&ei=TspCT8v_HKeq2QXKio2yCA&usg=AFQjCNFu2V2XgoTfWUhAFNgIiOxLD6fmyA&sig2=J7_nD8A74THsYFbQFmcZQA" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&ved=0CEoQFjAC&url=http%3A%2F%2Fvampirewebsite.net%2F&ei=TspCT8v_HKeq2QXKio2yCA&usg=AFQjCNFu2V2XgoTfWUhAFNgIiOxLD6fmyA&sig2=J7_nD8A74THsYFbQFmcZQA" target="_blank">real vampire</a>, and you know everything about them, then please don't talk to me. Ever. The end. <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CDYQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FVampire&ei=TspCT8v_HKeq2QXKio2yCA&usg=AFQjCNEc2c96tDOpPJTqbG-sauaMXvJlaw&sig2=Z53vq0dgBMXzLljSCbXnsw" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CDYQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FVampire&ei=TspCT8v_HKeq2QXKio2yCA&usg=AFQjCNEc2c96tDOpPJTqbG-sauaMXvJlaw&sig2=Z53vq0dgBMXzLljSCbXnsw" target="_blank">Real vampires</a> do not sparkle, they do not get girl's pregnant, and their only brooding thought is which side of your neck they want to nom down on. They want to kill you, not marry you. They like blood, not spying on you longingly through a window while you sleep like a pedo-bear. Did I mention that they don't sparkle? Because, trust me, they don't. The only shine on them is the glint of light you get off their fangs right before they sink into your flesh (which you won't see, because they're sneaky). Come on, people, don't be lame. If you can't name a <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=17&sqi=2&ved=0CKcBEBYwEA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.wsu.edu%2F~delahoyd%2Fvampirefilms.html&ei=mMtCT6ebLuHE2QWFuZGQCA&usg=AFQjCNFQQhDMsDsawvsQB3SlhosRrCe8Pw&sig2=btLvUPoEBfqDuFPOL_0cog" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=17&sqi=2&ved=0CKcBEBYwEA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.wsu.edu%2F~delahoyd%2Fvampirefilms.html&ei=mMtCT6ebLuHE2QWFuZGQCA&usg=AFQjCNFQQhDMsDsawvsQB3SlhosRrCe8Pw&sig2=btLvUPoEBfqDuFPOL_0cog" target="_blank">real vampire</a> other than <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CDcQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FDracula&ei=BMtCT5WgMqjq2QWjvfmtCA&usg=AFQjCNFtyIEieR-3diJB9KQDbGDGsaa6jA&sig2=YaJW9g4pBJrnTiH3XDeDdg" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CDcQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FDracula&ei=BMtCT5WgMqjq2QWjvfmtCA&usg=AFQjCNFtyIEieR-3diJB9KQDbGDGsaa6jA&sig2=YaJW9g4pBJrnTiH3XDeDdg" target="_blank">Dracula</a> (and probably <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&sqi=2&ved=0CD4QFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FLestat_de_Lioncourt&ei=F8xCT7zQIK6I2gX0hfm2CA&usg=AFQjCNGGNQxrYXxlYciW1tPlk5jS4QzShg&sig2=p_g5xilO5h18dW7SLkau5Q" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&sqi=2&ved=0CD4QFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FLestat_de_Lioncourt&ei=F8xCT7zQIK6I2gX0hfm2CA&usg=AFQjCNGGNQxrYXxlYciW1tPlk5jS4QzShg&sig2=p_g5xilO5h18dW7SLkau5Q" target="_blank">Lestat</a>) that wasn't in one of the aforementioned movies/shows, please do not count yourself as a curator of real vampire knowledge. It started centuries ago, and you would know that if you stopped to do some simple research.</div>
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<strong>Ninjas</strong></div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/NinjasArentReal-150x1502.png" href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/NinjasArentReal-150x1502.png"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-full wp-image-1642" data-mce-src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/NinjasArentReal-150x1502.png" height="150" src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/NinjasArentReal-150x1502.png" style="border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; float: left;" width="150" /></a>Do you even know what a <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CDcQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FNinja&ei=bc5CT4-JH8W22gWdvaGnCA&usg=AFQjCNGjvSTZi53FyW4XGaDp6phZkDtgkA&sig2=CxaSON8uZwl3r2NDsg0jgg" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CDcQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FNinja&ei=bc5CT4-JH8W22gWdvaGnCA&usg=AFQjCNGjvSTZi53FyW4XGaDp6phZkDtgkA&sig2=CxaSON8uZwl3r2NDsg0jgg" target="_blank">real ninja</a> is? Any of the history? All joking aside, <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&ved=0CEQQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.realultimatepower.net%2Findex4.htm&ei=bc5CT4-JH8W22gWdvaGnCA&usg=AFQjCNHlzWijGkqjDyhJNXL8VuHZtjI7tA&sig2=YxopN5zWUNnv4Fua_GJFbw" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&ved=0CEQQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.realultimatepower.net%2Findex4.htm&ei=bc5CT4-JH8W22gWdvaGnCA&usg=AFQjCNHlzWijGkqjDyhJNXL8VuHZtjI7tA&sig2=YxopN5zWUNnv4Fua_GJFbw" target="_blank">real ninjas</a> are dudes who were protecting themselves from samurai(as an example). If the couldn't escape, they fought. Hence the quick and quiet sneaking around and the combat styles. This has gotten way out of hand. <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&sqi=2&ved=0CEMQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FMartial_arts_film&ei=PNBCT9yGJoq62gXiyKymCA&usg=AFQjCNFaKhVrLPIAhcdgMtLBwgmNpSkZVg&sig2=MtzXs8BVz5G6Z3c5qRpU8A" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&sqi=2&ved=0CEMQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FMartial_arts_film&ei=PNBCT9yGJoq62gXiyKymCA&usg=AFQjCNFaKhVrLPIAhcdgMtLBwgmNpSkZVg&sig2=MtzXs8BVz5G6Z3c5qRpU8A" target="_blank">Martial Arts movies</a> are awesome, but I bet you can't name one that didn't have Jackie Chan or Jet Li in it. I bet you couldn't even name more than one or two of those. I don't like you, bandwagon rider. I don't like you at all. Oh, and there are multiple fighting styles, not just Kung fu. <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CEQQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FChinese_martial_arts&ei=389CT9KjN4iA2wXr6t2nAg&usg=AFQjCNHCW6yPObdnQVWbmatuX--nCdIt1g&sig2=BPMcYANjbTMsWYfRvW3q2Q" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CEQQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FChinese_martial_arts&ei=389CT9KjN4iA2wXr6t2nAg&usg=AFQjCNHCW6yPObdnQVWbmatuX--nCdIt1g&sig2=BPMcYANjbTMsWYfRvW3q2Q" target="_blank">Kung fu</a> can also be used to describe things completely unrelated to martial arts in the <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&sqi=2&ved=0CDcQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FChinese_culture&ei=FNBCT9KsFqjC2wWT5PTuCg&usg=AFQjCNFt8u0hhezChGo-koVJQln8j-KMZQ&sig2=b4fo9sq70c-AhJmlE4CCFA" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&sqi=2&ved=0CDcQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FChinese_culture&ei=FNBCT9KsFqjC2wWT5PTuCg&usg=AFQjCNFt8u0hhezChGo-koVJQln8j-KMZQ&sig2=b4fo9sq70c-AhJmlE4CCFA" target="_blank">Chinese culture</a>. I bet you didn't know that. Again, no Google involved. Did your mind just blow? I bet it did. You can be a "picture ninja" or a "<a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&ved=0CEgQFjAC&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.urbandictionary.com%2Fdefine.php%3Fterm%3DDrink%2520Ninja&ei=ic9CT7G4DaaA2wWqtIWYCA&usg=AFQjCNEphkvNx3FyrH6lziOGKMOdL3VnSw&sig2=E6bKeLlHBRE1F_cw55HO6w" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&ved=0CEgQFjAC&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.urbandictionary.com%2Fdefine.php%3Fterm%3DDrink%2520Ninja&ei=ic9CT7G4DaaA2wWqtIWYCA&usg=AFQjCNEphkvNx3FyrH6lziOGKMOdL3VnSw&sig2=E6bKeLlHBRE1F_cw55HO6w" target="_blank">drink ninja</a>" or a "douche ninja" all day long, but that isn't the same thing as being a "lover of", or "informed about", <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=10&ved=0CHcQFjAJ&url=http%3A%2F%2Fasianhistory.about.com%2Fod%2Fwarsinasia%2Fp%2FNinjaProfile.htm&ei=bc5CT4-JH8W22gWdvaGnCA&usg=AFQjCNFt0psNSe4lCxgjtXLHCGgjNrKVrg&sig2=HJGAQlZPzYbGglxPk1PjLg" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=10&ved=0CHcQFjAJ&url=http%3A%2F%2Fasianhistory.about.com%2Fod%2Fwarsinasia%2Fp%2FNinjaProfile.htm&ei=bc5CT4-JH8W22gWdvaGnCA&usg=AFQjCNFt0psNSe4lCxgjtXLHCGgjNrKVrg&sig2=HJGAQlZPzYbGglxPk1PjLg" target="_blank">real ninjas</a>. When you decide that you want to be classified as a "lover" of something, at least do your homework first; That way, you don't come off looking like a total tool. I bet you collected Ty Beanie Babies, too, didn't you?</div>
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<strong>Tim Burton</strong></div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/TimBurton-150x1501.gif" href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/TimBurton-150x1501.gif"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-full wp-image-1643" data-mce-src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/TimBurton-150x1501.gif" height="150" src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/TimBurton-150x1501.gif" style="border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; float: left;" width="150" /></a>I specifically remember when my love for <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&sqi=2&ved=0CEsQFjAC&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FTim_Burton&ei=2NBCT8jgG7PE2QWxwKyfCA&usg=AFQjCNF3ZVya4yVsNEDI3knDClFEsOjApg&sig2=q3nAfuQ5WsZBrVwUuuG2ag" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&sqi=2&ved=0CEsQFjAC&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FTim_Burton&ei=2NBCT8jgG7PE2QWxwKyfCA&usg=AFQjCNF3ZVya4yVsNEDI3knDClFEsOjApg&sig2=q3nAfuQ5WsZBrVwUuuG2ag" target="_blank">Tim Burton</a> began. My maternal grandmother bought the VHS of <em><a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&sqi=2&ved=0CE0QFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FThe_Nightmare_Before_Christmas&ei=d9FCT_6yEeie2AWI1JGRCA&usg=AFQjCNFGXubR5qDJ3MjFRHpvvnFzQqU-dQ&sig2=MWP7dkITBSlv9G9gNCu8IQ" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&sqi=2&ved=0CE0QFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FThe_Nightmare_Before_Christmas&ei=d9FCT_6yEeie2AWI1JGRCA&usg=AFQjCNFGXubR5qDJ3MjFRHpvvnFzQqU-dQ&sig2=MWP7dkITBSlv9G9gNCu8IQ" target="_blank">The Nightmare Before Christmas</a></em>, thinking it was something else. She put it in, and let me watch all of ten minutes of it, before ripping it out and hiding it from me. I was young, and she thought it was Satan in a puffy VHS case. I had already fallen in love, however, and quickly began soaking everything around me that I could find related to him up. I thought (and still think) he was a genius. Everything he touches turns to awesome. Vincent Malloy? Gasm.<em> <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=9&ved=0CFgQFjAI&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FStalk_of_the_Celery_Monster&ei=AtJCT__UF4mw2QXGuYGwCA&usg=AFQjCNHw6rIkguyEIT9TbUTqezNy0SDMFQ&sig2=f-P_CC9XVdM-EJvW-mX4AQ" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=9&ved=0CFgQFjAI&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FStalk_of_the_Celery_Monster&ei=AtJCT__UF4mw2QXGuYGwCA&usg=AFQjCNHw6rIkguyEIT9TbUTqezNy0SDMFQ&sig2=f-P_CC9XVdM-EJvW-mX4AQ" target="_blank">Stalk of the Celery Monster</a></em>, his first short that gained the attention of Disney? Amazing. <em>Faerie Tale Theatre</em>? Win. You see, loverly faux fanatics, I, yet again, am not using Google. I don't need to. I know my stuff about the things I fan girl all over. I immersed myself in everything I could find, back before I had the internet. I love everything he's ever done, and that love is still strong today. I hate that people obsess over <em><a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&sqi=2&ved=0CD4QFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.imdb.com%2Fname%2Fnm0000318%2F&ei=2NBCT8jgG7PE2QWxwKyfCA&usg=AFQjCNFn7lucuQPdsQ1jGq7rbPavt9yMTw&sig2=YdijVD_qOTJr0_QBXNhtYg" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&sqi=2&ved=0CD4QFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.imdb.com%2Fname%2Fnm0000318%2F&ei=2NBCT8jgG7PE2QWxwKyfCA&usg=AFQjCNFn7lucuQPdsQ1jGq7rbPavt9yMTw&sig2=YdijVD_qOTJr0_QBXNhtYg" target="_blank">The Nightmare Before Christmas</a></em> and <em><a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CD0QFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.imdb.com%2Ftitle%2Ftt0099487%2F&ei=MNJCT8WoGvDo2gWZuZGgCA&usg=AFQjCNH024VbEsJyuQeWC00_T_1u1ASQHQ&sig2=EbekVSLB4xdAM7IbhzCN7Q" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CD0QFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.imdb.com%2Ftitle%2Ftt0099487%2F&ei=MNJCT8WoGvDo2gWZuZGgCA&usg=AFQjCNH024VbEsJyuQeWC00_T_1u1ASQHQ&sig2=EbekVSLB4xdAM7IbhzCN7Q" target="_blank">Edward Scissorhands</a></em>, and that's where their "knowledge" stops. It's kind-of like professing your love of <em>The Beatles</em>, and thinking their best (and only) song is 'Yellow Submarine'. No.. just.. no. Can you say you've seen anything that wasn't mainstreamed by him? I can. His paintings are some of the most amazing things I've seen. His work is inspired heavily by Poe and old-school monster movies, and that makes it even better. I will still think you're asinine if I see you spouting off these facts in a few days, but I will at least respect that you had the decency to glean a small amount of information to continue your tool-tirade.</div>
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<strong>Pirates</strong></div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/arealpirate-150x1501.jpg" href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/arealpirate-150x1501.jpg"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-full wp-image-1644" data-mce-src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/arealpirate-150x1501.jpg" height="150" src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/arealpirate-150x1501.jpg" style="border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; float: left;" width="150" /></a>I love <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&sqi=2&ved=0CEQQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FJohnny_Depp&ei=1NJCT57VHcKA2wWXx9mMCA&usg=AFQjCNGUPuJFXb5RphiFWVDX2dgKStJy1g&sig2=hpwiViUZAslyjuIiRYd-XA" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&sqi=2&ved=0CEQQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FJohnny_Depp&ei=1NJCT57VHcKA2wWXx9mMCA&usg=AFQjCNGUPuJFXb5RphiFWVDX2dgKStJy1g&sig2=hpwiViUZAslyjuIiRYd-XA" target="_blank">Johnny Depp</a> so hard. I was in love with him after I saw <em><a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&sqi=2&ved=0CC4QFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.imdb.com%2Ftitle%2Ftt0108550%2F&ei=J9NCT5CjAaad2QXJn9CJCA&usg=AFQjCNEuyQPDo0bMZzFYt_sRX96Wt3_waA&sig2=B7xzlWxHuA_IxHFKh2vtBg" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&sqi=2&ved=0CC4QFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.imdb.com%2Ftitle%2Ftt0108550%2F&ei=J9NCT5CjAaad2QXJn9CJCA&usg=AFQjCNEuyQPDo0bMZzFYt_sRX96Wt3_waA&sig2=B7xzlWxHuA_IxHFKh2vtBg" target="_blank">What's Eating Gilbert Grape</a></em>. Mostly because I love the book, but also because he's gorgeous and amazing at every role he plays. I still think Bill Murray was the perfect Hunter S. Thompson, but ol' Johnny did a fantastical job as well. Now, that being said, how can you "pirate fanatics" sit there and call yourselves that? <em><a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&sqi=2&ved=0CEoQFjAC&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.imdb.com%2Ftitle%2Ftt0325980%2F&ei=SdNCT4iJBcb62gXjx7SLCA&usg=AFQjCNH3ceMbzfZVSzzZLqt8j3JwvY86Ug&sig2=_yoMDTM5_bor9UnRA3OSZg" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&sqi=2&ved=0CEoQFjAC&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.imdb.com%2Ftitle%2Ftt0325980%2F&ei=SdNCT4iJBcb62gXjx7SLCA&usg=AFQjCNH3ceMbzfZVSzzZLqt8j3JwvY86Ug&sig2=_yoMDTM5_bor9UnRA3OSZg" target="_blank">Pirates of the Caribbean</a></em> comes out and suddenly you've loved pirates since you were born? Um, I don't think so. Do you hear yourself? Ever? <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&ved=0CEMQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.piratesinfo.com%2F&ei=ENRCT6GRBqrO2AX_3JS4CA&usg=AFQjCNGkMTF7GKjvkluymy4N5FCZXbqKqg&sig2=Jr5nF0KIuXzsfdVb8F0QIQ" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&ved=0CEMQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.piratesinfo.com%2F&ei=ENRCT6GRBqrO2AX_3JS4CA&usg=AFQjCNGkMTF7GKjvkluymy4N5FCZXbqKqg&sig2=Jr5nF0KIuXzsfdVb8F0QIQ" target="_blank">Real pirates</a> were plunderers, thieves, murderers, and crushers of water-travelling dreams. Some were eventually good, but most died in a blaze of infamous glory. You're not seeing the difference here? Even Jack Sparrow was a bad dude most of the time. Humanity can be seen in a lot of situations, but it's lacking in the majority of <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&sqi=2&ved=0CD8QFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fevents.nationalgeographic.com%2Fevents%2Fexhibits%2Freal-pirates%2F&ei=xNRCT9iCMIX02QW4-MmTCA&usg=AFQjCNGgqQ8w_xaKK42zoHRvPFEFUpOy7Q&sig2=P9wDZJqDGdckUXKOMUOiFw" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&sqi=2&ved=0CD8QFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fevents.nationalgeographic.com%2Fevents%2Fexhibits%2Freal-pirates%2F&ei=xNRCT9iCMIX02QW4-MmTCA&usg=AFQjCNGgqQ8w_xaKK42zoHRvPFEFUpOy7Q&sig2=P9wDZJqDGdckUXKOMUOiFw" target="_blank">real pirate</a> history. It's not a cool profession to steal, lie, and murder. If you think being on the run from half the world's police forces is something to be desired, then yeah, you're a good candidate for <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=5&ved=0CF8QFjAE&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FPiracy&ei=ENRCT6GRBqrO2AX_3JS4CA&usg=AFQjCNHscE01evgafDpJ-ZwXMusyJgNK3Q&sig2=wxj2SZAplExC6caw-2HDUw" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=5&ved=0CF8QFjAE&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FPiracy&ei=ENRCT6GRBqrO2AX_3JS4CA&usg=AFQjCNHscE01evgafDpJ-ZwXMusyJgNK3Q&sig2=wxj2SZAplExC6caw-2HDUw" target="_blank">real pirate life</a>. You could also just stop pretending. Playing G-version pirates as a kid? Fun. Making a pirate joke here and there? Cool. Acting like you're the foremost expert on real pirates because you saw a movie with you girlfriends? Wrong. Stop it!</div>
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This is just a small example of things that I've noticed lately. I don't know if you or someone you know fits this bill, but if you/someone know does, make an effort to change. I'm sorry, but it's a pretty big slap in the face of these people/things to pretend to love them, when, in all reality, you just love them because you think it's cool. It's like saying you hate The Bachelor, but you've applied to be on it ten times. Tisk, tisk.. you've been outed, faux lovers.</div>
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This concludes my rant. Enjoy the rest of your week. Next week, at the request of a fan, I will be ranting about bad drivers. Beware, you might recognize yourself in that one.</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-74377841872516090132012-04-05T23:53:00.000-04:002012-04-16T00:57:11.427-04:00Snacking On Crac-- Err, Jalapeno Cream Cheese AwesomenessI once told someone that I would start blogging about the random things I've created/cooked in my kitchen.<br />
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Once again, I failed to do so.. over and over and over. Did you read my post about <a href="http://blog-likecouture.blogspot.com/2012/04/why-i-suck-at-blogging.html" target="_blank">why I totally suck ass at blogging</a>? Because this -- this right here -- is why. I'm a failure. Obviously.<br />
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Well, to make up for my crappy shortcomings, here's a recipe that I piddled around on for a couple of months while pregnant, and perfected right when the heartburn kicked in. Oh, joy.<br />
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Let's not forget that this shit is like crack. On a veggie. Or a cracker. More-so on a damn cracker. The fatty inside isn't allowed to eat this with crackers. Ever.. but I do. Like now. Someone save me from myself.. and this container. PLEASE.. not really.<br />
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Okay, so moving on to the good part! My recipe, some pretty pictures (sort-of), and a few of my favourite ways to use this sweet creamy nectar of the gods:<br />
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<i><span style="color: #990000;"><b>Jalapeno</b> (no, I most certainly CANNOT make special characters, thankyousoverymuchasshole) <b>Cream Cheese Dip</b></span></i></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKkcMP2p6xq4dKOcoaopCkNzH-xipFzjvdOxO80HlX_Qio5iywViRHgjEs3OsuIXGRmnFCmDL2PvqtTieTku0XAk7x9LZRl0hiltxWj6KuNOC4dEZQKU48jFJv_cD9lQ96u6wKeV3wCpo/s1600/IMG_20120405_230445.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKkcMP2p6xq4dKOcoaopCkNzH-xipFzjvdOxO80HlX_Qio5iywViRHgjEs3OsuIXGRmnFCmDL2PvqtTieTku0XAk7x9LZRl0hiltxWj6KuNOC4dEZQKU48jFJv_cD9lQ96u6wKeV3wCpo/s320/IMG_20120405_230445.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Most of the ingredients, right here. So fucking easy.</td></tr>
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<span style="color: #990000;"><b>- Half, to one entire package of cream cheese (depends on how much you want to make, really, and I usually use the super low fat kind, so I can justify eating more)</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #990000;"><b>- As many jalapeno slices as your little heart desires (mine? chock full of them.. and that is the brand I lovelovelove, so I use them all the time.)</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #990000;"><b>- Generous dash of Worcestershire sauce</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #990000;"><b>- Seasoned Salt to taste (Lawrey's is the best.. is that even spelled right? omg)</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #990000;"><b>- tablespoon of minced garlic (with or without juice.. and you can use less if you're not a huge fan like me.. this is why I don't blog recipes.. I don't really have any. I just throw shit together.. and it sometimes comes out great)</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #990000;"><b>Blend it all together with whatever you choose (I used my old school mini chopper, because I like when all the jalapenos don't get all chopped up.. chunky dip!) to do that with, transfer to <strike>mouth </strike> dish/bowl/storage container. Keeps great for about a week. Not that it'll last that long, but I'm just sayin'.</b></span></div>
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Now that you see I'm completely retarded when it comes to writing a recipe.. or remembering to use proper punctuation in parenthesis, here are some more pictures, and my favourite ways to eat this stuff.. no, off my fingers or shoveled into my mouth don't count. Shut up.</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibLsf9XIoQTXMskNtaK_aGDtp0Lb7-xQawrYQlMKCHFpCI-c_IFQX759XaH-IWbFAOhamm9P_ihhw5neLv3mlP6HD46veOo76VZKDHAChxZMmWSICEeUumtGZicTzMyyv-aHEWuhuT4LA/s1600/IMG_20120405_232237.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibLsf9XIoQTXMskNtaK_aGDtp0Lb7-xQawrYQlMKCHFpCI-c_IFQX759XaH-IWbFAOhamm9P_ihhw5neLv3mlP6HD46veOo76VZKDHAChxZMmWSICEeUumtGZicTzMyyv-aHEWuhuT4LA/s320/IMG_20120405_232237.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Town House cracker + carrot stick. I add Baco-s when I want to be fancy pants Kate. Plus, they're pretty! :) And that post-it is clean.. I just wanted to feel artsy. Instagram and wine do that to a person.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNbIwutiOVIRTZ5jbVOLznnrX5wjz7BDU5kvjM-AaxfkX1hvkHVRmyhu8G3TcI9hKBf1UZXTPuG80enON4-wsTzHxxLfRY8ma3ZX3PnEBYlhZo_E5S4gBlWvlZQ6dQuJMM0kDkNk2mxNQ/s1600/IMG_20120405_230755.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNbIwutiOVIRTZ5jbVOLznnrX5wjz7BDU5kvjM-AaxfkX1hvkHVRmyhu8G3TcI9hKBf1UZXTPuG80enON4-wsTzHxxLfRY8ma3ZX3PnEBYlhZo_E5S4gBlWvlZQ6dQuJMM0kDkNk2mxNQ/s320/IMG_20120405_230755.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">In my super cute little dip bowls.. HA! Like I only ate that much. I'm honestly laughing at the tiny portion photographed. This is also sans Baco-s, and still yummy as all get out!</td></tr>
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I love to eat this with crackers, dried french bread, croutons, carrots, broccoli, as a sandwich topper, with celery (that I hate any other time), fresh squash, baby corn, mushrooms.. off my fingers, off your fingers.. I don't care. This stuff is good with anything.<br />
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People assume you spent lots of time on it, so it's great for parties and the likes.. it's also a great healthy snack if you do it right. I think you can even make a cheese ball thing with dried beef out of it fairly easy.. well, I know you can, but it's such a pain in the ass that I just don't. People can deal with a half-ass presentation since it tastes like Jesus rubbed his awesomeness all over it.<br />
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Oh, and it also works great as a spread for toast and bagels.. and in omelets. Especially in omelets. With spinach in them. OMFG. SO. GOOD.<br />
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I cut my own hair.. and I don't look crazy. I'm proud of myself. I had to change the subject. I was headed for the fridge. THE DIP IS SEDUCING ME!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2qzvZ2lMgq0eZwdE5icOaJTq2-dvsvJJg9pQUTlHgHE2eG1EJimSn5YN4ayMCDNo7bAcMUwd2soFBhDt1-ItuVctEUPis5r5BFM4lqr9YGrxZslm4PQMt9xvcYLSw0DKgTd7Nwcx8CFc/s1600/IMG_20120404_155109.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2qzvZ2lMgq0eZwdE5icOaJTq2-dvsvJJg9pQUTlHgHE2eG1EJimSn5YN4ayMCDNo7bAcMUwd2soFBhDt1-ItuVctEUPis5r5BFM4lqr9YGrxZslm4PQMt9xvcYLSw0DKgTd7Nwcx8CFc/s320/IMG_20120404_155109.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-82309324238556266132012-04-04T17:03:00.000-04:002012-04-05T12:11:22.043-04:00Why I Suck At Blogging<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6STMVWovCQLuMw9vM05OKVjDq66drBlQBvd04th_wIv73O6G7gJWrXYXwJAyveNd6P6CramLLU2AuUE29rI0dR2-ruCljaOUgftsKwZBrBT7L4aJ5nqfhBsmaAx5p8L88sYAlUNPqJ4s/s1600/2012-03-31+02.31.39.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6STMVWovCQLuMw9vM05OKVjDq66drBlQBvd04th_wIv73O6G7gJWrXYXwJAyveNd6P6CramLLU2AuUE29rI0dR2-ruCljaOUgftsKwZBrBT7L4aJ5nqfhBsmaAx5p8L88sYAlUNPqJ4s/s320/2012-03-31+02.31.39.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Probably because I have two pillow pets.. that my kid isn't allowed to touch. SHE HAS HER OWN STOP JUDGING ME!</td></tr>
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I forget to do it. A lot.<br />
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And I never really have anything to say.. most days. It always seems like the post-it pile of ideas is mocking me.<br />
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"You wrote all these stupid ideas down, and now what? You're not going to write about them, so why did you waste paper?"<br />
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"Shut up, pile! I will TOTALLY write about this stuff.. eventually. Whatever, like you know me? YOU DON'T KNOW ME SO DON'T JUDGE ME PILE! ... I need a hug. I'm not writing about that shit -- it's all stupid. No one cares. OHMYGODI'MAFAILURE!"<br />
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I could write about my financial troubles in a hilarious way, sure. But would anyone care? Probably not.<br />
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I could write about my divorce, but really? Come on.. you don't care. I know you don't. Who wants to hear about two people who should've stayed friends, because they make the WORST. MARRIED PEOPLE. EVER?<br />
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I could write about how I lost my job at Raspwire because we didn't get enough traffic, but that's just lame. No one is going to hire me to write anything else after that, I'm sure. It's not like I write in any kind of REAL format or anything..<br />
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I could write about lots of things, but I never do. I just.. put it off. I then text the professor something stupid, and he replies (because he's the shit and doesn't want me to feel like I'm a TOTAL loser), and then I sit and pretend to be doing something important for a while.<br />
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Did I ever tell you that we take the kiddo on treasure hunts in the woods? Because, well, we do. non-Husband will take her, they will bury something (always the same thing, really) in the case that is supposed to hold my car radio face plate thing, and then we go dig it back up the next day.<br />
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Yeah, I know, totally lame.<br />
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Um.. I made some pretty awesome cookies the other day? No.. I'm not even going there.<br />
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OH! I got a bunch of stuff from Tillys.com, and it's all awesome. Bad ass headphones, Easter dress so I'm not the idiot in skinny jeans and a blazer again.. sunglasses.. shirts.. shut up.<br />
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And this is why I suck at blogging. Also, reason #459 that it's impossible to live with me. I HAVE A LOT OF INNER TURMOIL.<br />
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#218 is the obnoxious singing in the shower.<br />
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Okay, okay.. I'm done. Carry on.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-12110948024447287962012-03-28T12:19:00.001-04:002012-03-31T16:38:47.197-04:00A Whole Lot Of Word-ful WednesdayI'll be the first to admit, you really had me from "Hello". You were everything and more to me, and I was completely enthralled. I thought you were too cool for school, and I was more than willing to spend the rest of forever with you by my side.<br />
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You gave me my beautiful little girl, you gave me a new purpose, and then everything changed.<br />
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How it changed, when it changed, I'll never know -- but it did, and it wasn't good. Now we're at this place, and this place is scary. It's crazy, it's going to get messy, and I'm so lost as to how it happened. It's like you don't know me, almost six years later; I don't know you.<br />
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I sit here, wondering where the love and the respect went. I wish it was just hiding under the bed, or in the corner that always seems to be forgotten when the house gets dusted, but I've looked -- things like talking about things, standing beside each other through all the good and bad, and a simple "I appreciate you", don't really "hide" in houses -- and they're just.. gone now.<br />
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You want to live there, and I want to live here. I asked where that left us, and all you could say was "I don't know". Well, I don't know, either, and I find that I no longer care. It's like the "care" has been sucked out of me. I just want all this to be over.<br />
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I want to feel like I matter; like what I say and do is important. I want to be appreciated. I want to be told I'm beautiful and you couldn't live without me. Fuck how it sounds, I want to be rescued. I want to be protected and feel like I'm the only person in the world when you look at me. I want a life full of respect, admiration, and completely irrational love. I want to feel beautiful, and I've come to realize there's nothing wrong with that.<br />
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I want to be swept off my feet. I want to be told how much I mean to you every single day. I want my child to grow up seeing me happy, not crying all the time because of yet<i> another</i> fight. I want you to hold me tight and tell me everything is going to be alright at the end of the day. I want my self-respect back. I want my daughter to see that her Mom is important to you. I want her to be raised in a house full of love.<br />
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I realize we're never going to have this, no matter how hard I try. All I ever wanted was the best for us, and you just can't see that; all you see is what you want, and it's not the same.<br />
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I think you <i>did</i> want it, but once you realized it meant growing up and losing a part of the "care-free" life you were living, you just.. didn't. And that's okay. We're not happy, we're miserable. I don't want us to hate each other, especially since the little girl we brought into this world adores us both. I want us to be friends, no matter what, because she's worth all the effort it will take to pull it off.<br />
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I love you, but I'm no longer <i>in </i>love. We've grown in separate directions, but what we had will always be there, and it will keep us striving for the best life we can have -- for ourselves, and for our daughter.<br />
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So I'm going to be as graceful as I can, and I'm going to move on; I'm going to find a better life. I'm going to find someone who will stand beside me, no matter what, and be there to make me feel like I matter. I'm going to find the person that loves me beyond reason, and will treat me like I deserve to be treated. The person who will correct me when I'm wrong, admit when I'm right, and think I'm the best thing that ever happened to them, not the worst. I'll find the person that is open to all I've begged to give you, and will love that I love them with everything I have.<br />
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I'll find the person who will love me when I'm at my worst, and be proud of me when I find my best. I'll find the life I always wanted, and I just hope that you'll find what you're looking for, too. I want you to be happy, and I hope that you can live the life you always wanted. I'm just sorry it wasn't the life we had together that you wanted.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-15716714810329155022012-03-26T13:45:00.001-04:002012-03-26T13:46:03.868-04:00Mass Effect 3: I'm In Love With You Already<br />
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For everyone in love with <a data-mce-href="http://masseffect.wikia.com/wiki/Shepard" href="http://masseffect.wikia.com/wiki/Shepard" target="_blank">Shepard</a> (or FemShep, as fans call the female version), the sleepless nights spent waiting on the release of <a data-mce-href="http://masseffect.wikia.com/wiki/Mass_Effect_3" href="http://masseffect.wikia.com/wiki/Mass_Effect_3" target="_blank">Mass Effect 3</a> are almost over. From the very first scene of the very first game, it's been a romance worth all the hours logged. I've been sighing and drooling over the website for months. The demo has been out for a minute, and people are loving it. I've been scouring the internet, and picking people's brains, and I've come up with a little bit of information to share with the masses.<br />
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If you're completely new to the trilogy of amazingness that is Mass Effect, here's a run-down courtesy of Wiki (because they're more comprehensive, and don't say things like "nerdgasm", and "fan girl", and "omgomgomgomg", all the time):</div>
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<em><strong>Mass Effect</strong></em> is an award-winning, bestselling series of <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Action_role-playing_game" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Action_role-playing_game" title="Action role-playing game">action role-playing</a> video games developed by the Canadian company <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/BioWare" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/BioWare" title="BioWare">BioWare</a> and released for the <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xbox_360" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xbox_360" title="Xbox 360">Xbox 360</a>, <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Games_for_Windows" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Games_for_Windows" title="Games for Windows">Microsoft Windows</a> and, from the second installment, for the <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PlayStation_3" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PlayStation_3" title="PlayStation 3">PlayStation 3</a>. <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mass_Effect_(video_game)" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mass_Effect_(video_game)" title="Mass Effect (video game)">The first game</a> in the planned trilogy centers around a <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Character_creation" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Character_creation" title="Character creation">player created character</a> named <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Characters_of_Mass_Effect#Commander_Shepard" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Characters_of_Mass_Effect#Commander_Shepard" title="Characters of Mass Effect">Commander Shepard</a> and his/her mission to save the <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Milky_Way" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Milky_Way" title="Milky Way">galaxy</a> from a race of <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mechanical_engineering" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mechanical_engineering" title="Mechanical engineering">mechanical</a> beings known as <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reapers_(Mass_Effect)" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reapers_(Mass_Effect)" title="Reapers (Mass Effect)">the Reapers</a>, and its followers, including <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saren_Arterius" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saren_Arterius" title="Saren Arterius">Saren Arterius</a>. The first game sees Shepard facing Sovereign, a Reaper left as a vanguard, who plans to allow the Reaper fleet currently hibernating in <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Extragalactic_astronomy" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Extragalactic_astronomy" title="Extragalactic astronomy">extra-galactic</a> dark space to invade the Milky Way and destroy all <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sapience" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sapience" title="Sapience">sapient</a> organic life, continuing a mysterious cycle of destruction. <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mass_Effect_2" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mass_Effect_2" title="Mass Effect 2">The second game</a> takes place two years later, and sees Shepard battling the Collectors, an alien race abducting entire human colonies in a plan to help the Reapers return to the Milky Way. The third and final game will center on the final battle against the Reapers.<br />
Since the beginning, the series has been a major critical success. Both games have received critical acclaim for their storyline, characters, romances, voice acting, choices, tolerance of diversity, and the depth of the galaxy.<span data-mce-style="font-size: 11px;" style="font-size: 11px;"> </span>Video game website <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/GamesRadar" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/GamesRadar" title="GamesRadar">GamesRadar</a> called <em>Mass Effect</em> the best new franchise of the generation, saying that the galaxy was so well-constructed that it felt like a decades-old franchise and that it represented "a high-water mark for video games as a story-telling medium."</blockquote>
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Now, even with all the anime, comics, books, films, and games, I have still been left dying inside waiting for the last installment. I know, now, that I will not be disappointed:</div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=5&ved=0CF8QFjAE&url=http%3A%2F%2Fxbox360.ign.com%2Fobjects%2F142%2F14235014.html&ei=BgFGT_aIFMqusQKBnKnmDg&usg=AFQjCNFBpm9ym9vwOozxNCiS1zeSYTEQhg&sig2=TP35xap0NMruK3tWykglyA" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=5&ved=0CF8QFjAE&url=http%3A%2F%2Fxbox360.ign.com%2Fobjects%2F142%2F14235014.html&ei=BgFGT_aIFMqusQKBnKnmDg&usg=AFQjCNFBpm9ym9vwOozxNCiS1zeSYTEQhg&sig2=TP35xap0NMruK3tWykglyA" target="_blank">Mass Effect 3</a> plunges you into an all-out <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=4&ved=0CFUQFjAD&url=http%3A%2F%2Fmasseffect.com%2F&ei=BgFGT_aIFMqusQKBnKnmDg&usg=AFQjCNEErCT22NxfdTosD9iwKy5kCg2yUA&sig2=vqW5jigkFp8YHpvBL1Gp7A" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=4&ved=0CFUQFjAD&url=http%3A%2F%2Fmasseffect.com%2F&ei=BgFGT_aIFMqusQKBnKnmDg&usg=AFQjCNEErCT22NxfdTosD9iwKy5kCg2yUA&sig2=vqW5jigkFp8YHpvBL1Gp7A" target="_blank">galactic war</a> to take Earth back from a nearly unstoppable foe – and how you fight that war is entirely up to you. Choose a fast-paced cinematic experience or delve into a deeper, more choice-driven narrative. Either way, intense combat propels the action as you fight to unite a war-torn galaxy against a common enemy.</blockquote>
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The game play is reminiscent of Knights of the Old Republic, in that everything you do shapes how the story continues, including a feature not seen in KOTOR: What you do carries over into the next game. It's a feature that I can't wait to get in to. I love a good story line and tons of action, and both are going to be delivered to me in one nice, neat little package. The intense fighting will fuel the story line farther, so I get the best of both worlds. Also, I get to stare longingly at the <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=8&ved=0CHsQFjAH&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.gametrailers.com%2Fgame%2Fmass-effect-3%2F12960&ei=BgFGT_aIFMqusQKBnKnmDg&usg=AFQjCNHygkrl_y1auv7CNmHJEvq9fYPz7Q&sig2=7orcNZU9FOwoFx4SFb1BBQ" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=8&ved=0CHsQFjAH&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.gametrailers.com%2Fgame%2Fmass-effect-3%2F12960&ei=BgFGT_aIFMqusQKBnKnmDg&usg=AFQjCNHygkrl_y1auv7CNmHJEvq9fYPz7Q&sig2=7orcNZU9FOwoFx4SFb1BBQ" target="_blank">Commander</a>, in either form, and wish my husband looked like that.</div>
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For newcomers, they are starting the game in a way that makes it easier to get fully caught-up and immersed. The website tells you all about it:</div>
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If you're new to this award-winning series, <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&ved=0CD4QFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FMass_Effect&ei=zgFGT_KgHcXLsQL67oTODg&usg=AFQjCNH70tcH266s2DXQD8xSWX5iHCv_Fg&sig2=Y72LuFV7dYU6Z7gihKjZqA" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&ved=0CD4QFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FMass_Effect&ei=zgFGT_KgHcXLsQL67oTODg&usg=AFQjCNH70tcH266s2DXQD8xSWX5iHCv_Fg&sig2=Y72LuFV7dYU6Z7gihKjZqA" target="_blank">Mass Effect 3</a> offers a unique opening narrative to immerse you in the storyline and characters, quickly and easily preparing you for the beginning, middle, and end of a galactic war for survival.</blockquote>
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I love this feature, and I hope that I can get my husband to love the trilogy as much as I do with this game. I'm already trying to convince him to dive into the website and get friendly with it; no luck thus far.</div>
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The places they're taking us to look amazing, and some of them are "<a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=6&ved=0CGcQFjAF&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FMass_Effect_3&ei=BQJGT_LoEKOIsQKwveHjDg&usg=AFQjCNEft2ssb2rzlsXulCrJU1_mov2dUA&sig2=0OQdf1CW061VZUM5IXAoqA" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=6&ved=0CGcQFjAF&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FMass_Effect_3&ei=BQJGT_LoEKOIsQKwveHjDg&usg=AFQjCNEft2ssb2rzlsXulCrJU1_mov2dUA&sig2=0OQdf1CW061VZUM5IXAoqA" target="_blank">Classified</a>", leaving us in suspense. So far, they've listed the following:</div>
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<li>Earth</li>
<li>Geth Dreadnoughts</li>
<li>Palaven</li>
<li>Rannoch</li>
<li>Sur'Kesh</li>
<li>Tuchanka</li>
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The characters you build your relationships with are also listed, but again, some of them are deemed "<a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=4&ved=0CFUQFjAD&url=http%3A%2F%2Fmasseffect.com%2F&ei=BQJGT_LoEKOIsQKwveHjDg&usg=AFQjCNEErCT22NxfdTosD9iwKy5kCg2yUA&sig2=nLBzDOCSrpJjAkLqSjyl-A" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=4&ved=0CFUQFjAD&url=http%3A%2F%2Fmasseffect.com%2F&ei=BQJGT_LoEKOIsQKwveHjDg&usg=AFQjCNEErCT22NxfdTosD9iwKy5kCg2yUA&sig2=nLBzDOCSrpJjAkLqSjyl-A" target="_blank">Classified</a>", and you won't know who they are until you bust open the case and get to playing:</div>
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<li>Commander Shepard</li>
<li>David Anderson</li>
<li>Ashley Williams</li>
<li>Kaiden Alenko</li>
<li>Liara T'Soni</li>
<li>James Vega</li>
</ul>
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I know, right? I want more!</div>
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Here's more! Your arsenal of ass-kicking weaponry? It's custom, yo! This is what the website has to say about it, which leaves me in full-on excitement mode:</div>
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From the first moments of <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=7&ved=0CHQQFjAG&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.amazon.com%2FMass-Effect-3-Xbox-360%2Fdp%2FB004FYEZMQ&ei=BQJGT_LoEKOIsQKwveHjDg&usg=AFQjCNEkyENA7n1Ab6J8crt3tTvE2fIqVQ&sig2=VCxXbYs-2ITPMvMlsFx7Xw" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=7&ved=0CHQQFjAG&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.amazon.com%2FMass-Effect-3-Xbox-360%2Fdp%2FB004FYEZMQ&ei=BQJGT_LoEKOIsQKwveHjDg&usg=AFQjCNEkyENA7n1Ab6J8crt3tTvE2fIqVQ&sig2=VCxXbYs-2ITPMvMlsFx7Xw" target="_blank">Mass Effect 3</a> you will build <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&ved=0CEkQqQIwAg&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.guardian.co.uk%2Ftechnology%2Fgamesblog%2F2012%2Ffeb%2F21%2Fmass-effect-3-preview&ei=BQJGT_LoEKOIsQKwveHjDg&usg=AFQjCNGnhwEPG5fgyvhI0bstdyUR9ZApCw&sig2=w-Jb76CroaBoMyrsP1w21Q" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&ved=0CEkQqQIwAg&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.guardian.co.uk%2Ftechnology%2Fgamesblog%2F2012%2Ffeb%2F21%2Fmass-effect-3-preview&ei=BQJGT_LoEKOIsQKwveHjDg&usg=AFQjCNGnhwEPG5fgyvhI0bstdyUR9ZApCw&sig2=w-Jb76CroaBoMyrsP1w21Q" target="_blank">Shepard</a> into the warrior you want to be. Choose your appearance (including male or female) and pick from a variety of specialized combat classes, each with unique and devastating abilities. As you progress in the war against the Reapers, you'll choose which customizable weapons to use, which abilities and powers to upgrade, which armor upgrades to equip, and which characters will join your squad.</blockquote>
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Eeeeek! Yes! Stoked, stoked, stoked, STOKED! I love when I can make things my own, and tailor my team to my specifications. It makes for a better experience all-around.</div>
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Still not enough? Still not enough! Here's something about the stellar shoot-em-up parts of the game:</div>
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Wage war against the <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=6&ved=0CGcQFjAF&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FMass_Effect_3&ei=BQJGT_LoEKOIsQKwveHjDg&usg=AFQjCNEft2ssb2rzlsXulCrJU1_mov2dUA&sig2=0OQdf1CW061VZUM5IXAoqA" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=6&ved=0CGcQFjAF&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FMass_Effect_3&ei=BQJGT_LoEKOIsQKwveHjDg&usg=AFQjCNEft2ssb2rzlsXulCrJU1_mov2dUA&sig2=0OQdf1CW061VZUM5IXAoqA" target="_blank">Reapers</a> your way. Command your elite squad to exert full tactical control over battlefield, or charge in guns blazing and devastate the enemy with overwhelming firepower. Use stealth technology and an enhanced sniper rifle to drop opponents before they see you coming. Throw enemies into the air with <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/aclk?sa=l&ai=CIlnfBQJGT_vWE6W9sQLMmI2lBMLwlvUB0qXC7iHvmqSALAgAEAFQk7DMC2DJ9oiN5KTwE6ABprDK4QPIAQGqBBlP0PdY41SnUl_lLBWUTPgf1MfT9VE1OtTU&sig=AOD64_0qvAiYNokHyTqQKCDbUnSZ8yehEw&ved=0CA4Q0Qw&adurl=http://clickserve.dartsearch.net/link/click%3Flid%3D43700003163050668%26ds_s_kwgid%3D58700000019961284%26ds_e_adid%3D9001380250%26ds_e_matchtype%3Dsearch%26ds_url_v%3D2&rct=j&q=mass+effect+3" href="http://www.google.com/aclk?sa=l&ai=CIlnfBQJGT_vWE6W9sQLMmI2lBMLwlvUB0qXC7iHvmqSALAgAEAFQk7DMC2DJ9oiN5KTwE6ABprDK4QPIAQGqBBlP0PdY41SnUl_lLBWUTPgf1MfT9VE1OtTU&sig=AOD64_0qvAiYNokHyTqQKCDbUnSZ8yehEw&ved=0CA4Q0Qw&adurl=http://clickserve.dartsearch.net/link/click%3Flid%3D43700003163050668%26ds_s_kwgid%3D58700000019961284%26ds_e_adid%3D9001380250%26ds_e_matchtype%3Dsearch%26ds_url_v%3D2&rct=j&q=mass+effect+3" target="_blank">telekinetic "biotic" abilities</a> and have your squad shred them with their assault rifles. Position turrets and hack opposing tech to turn the entire warzone into hostile ground for your adversaries.</blockquote>
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Now, I don't know about you guys, but I love <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&ved=0CEAQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.y8.com%2Ftags%2FFirst_Person_Shooter&ei=9wJGT-yVBMS2sQLpgPnADg&usg=AFQjCNEQ0LUpa65s_6uYrwROh-wAdIfOaQ&sig2=JBvJzA25DS_pdhT12FV-6A" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&ved=0CEAQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.y8.com%2Ftags%2FFirst_Person_Shooter&ei=9wJGT-yVBMS2sQLpgPnADg&usg=AFQjCNEQ0LUpa65s_6uYrwROh-wAdIfOaQ&sig2=JBvJzA25DS_pdhT12FV-6A" target="_blank">FPS games</a>, <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&ved=0CFcQFjAC&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.mmofront.com%2Fgames%2Fmmotps&ei=JwNGT8yPKavMsQLK6MDCDg&usg=AFQjCNERhxyqMhe6SgqdGbJiXIr40WaZaQ&sig2=OeGDRnWCGgO92hMPk3i1fw" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&ved=0CFcQFjAC&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.mmofront.com%2Fgames%2Fmmotps&ei=JwNGT8yPKavMsQLK6MDCDg&usg=AFQjCNERhxyqMhe6SgqdGbJiXIr40WaZaQ&sig2=OeGDRnWCGgO92hMPk3i1fw" target="_blank">TPS games</a>, and any other kind of shooter game. This one? It makes my heart flutter and my knees weak. Also, it makes me do super awesome poses in the mirror when I walk by, and stalk imaginary prey as I traipse through my house. It scares my family. They think I need to be committed. I see it as preemptive preparedness. Don't judge me!</div>
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Moving on..</div>
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Through all the conversations I've had with my friends about the demo, the one thing they're gushing over is the co-op capabilities. I read what the site had to say, and I can see why they're so in love:</div>
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Form an elite strike team with three of your friends, then work together to liberate key conflict zones in an action-packed co-operative multiplayer mode. You'll start as a human combatant, but through a deep progression system you can unlock other powerful races and classes. You will need the other classes' unique play style, powers, and abilities – plus other unlockable rewards such as weapons, armor, health and damage boosters, and upgrade kits – to defeat increasingly deadly waves of opposition. But above all, you will need teamwork to survive.</blockquote>
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Omgomgomg! OMG! Yes! I can't wait to tear it up with my boys (and ladies). Stoked doesn't begin to describe how I'm feeling at this point. I'm especially excited about the needed use of all classes. It forces people to branch out and work together. March 6th can't come fast enough!</div>
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Th last bit of information on the site is about the enemies. Some of the foes waiting to be vanquished are listed, and they look beastly:</div>
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<li>Banshee</li>
<li>Cannibal</li>
<li>Ravager</li>
<li>Cerberus Phantom</li>
<li>Geth Prime</li>
<li>Cerberus Engineer</li>
<li>Cerberus Trooper</li>
<li>Cerberus Guardian</li>
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The rest are listed as "Classified", but I'm certain they're even more deliciously evil than the ones they're letting us sneak a peek at. The site's little blurb just whets the palate, and makes me want to throw my computer out the nearest open window because I don't have my hands on the game yet:</div>
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The towering, unstoppable engines of destruction known as the <a data-mce-href="http://masseffect.wikia.com/wiki/Reapers" href="http://masseffect.wikia.com/wiki/Reapers" target="_blank">Reapers</a> pose the greatest-ever threat to the galaxy – and to your own survival. They bring with them a host of abominations – various races from across the galaxy, perverted into horrific servants of war. And the threat doesn't end there. Also standing in your way is a wide variety of malevolent forces, including the well-equipped pro-human group <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=5&sqi=2&ved=0CGEQFjAE&url=http%3A%2F%2Fmasseffect.wikia.com%2Fwiki%2FShadow_Broker_Dossiers%2FCerberus&ei=jANGT8DqOomJsALU8o3GDg&usg=AFQjCNG4vqJDsSsREPguZc_eQJL1tnqDIA&sig2=OZuU7uadc-R_moeAMtxNeg" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=5&sqi=2&ved=0CGEQFjAE&url=http%3A%2F%2Fmasseffect.wikia.com%2Fwiki%2FShadow_Broker_Dossiers%2FCerberus&ei=jANGT8DqOomJsALU8o3GDg&usg=AFQjCNG4vqJDsSsREPguZc_eQJL1tnqDIA&sig2=OZuU7uadc-R_moeAMtxNeg" target="_blank" title="Cerberus">Cerberus</a>, and the <a data-mce-href="http://masseffect.wikia.com/wiki/Geth" href="http://masseffect.wikia.com/wiki/Geth" target="_blank" title="Geth">Geth</a>, formidable alien adversaries with their own hidden agenda.</blockquote>
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For those of us that are waiting, this serves as something we've probably already seen, but with my little comments inserted here and there; for everyone else, this is the ultimate teaser. I hope you're as excited as I am to see how the story unfolds, and hopefully I'll see you on XBOX Live!</div>
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Happy gaming.. err, longing, everyone!</div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://masseffect.com/" href="http://masseffect.com/" target="_blank" title="Source">Source</a>, <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mass_Effect" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mass_Effect" target="_blank" title="Source">Source</a></div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;">Videos, descriptions, content from websites, etc. are all the property of either BioWare or Wikipedia.</span></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-51096116651154977952012-03-26T13:35:00.001-04:002012-03-26T13:35:04.443-04:00American Idol: Top 24 Chosen, 13th Guy To Be Announced<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0clPDTR4h0F1rq0pgbFVxBLIwdvcmVFBrTMpgeUs_AzvdOuOHwEXm2-auYztDzNrr_7ksNoCAEtLQIVorCQNp4BOPzQZvWwsMWZlkUw92fnBOYqYLiw1yNUXjcwUvSlmBkL4KSw94oNA/s1600/AI2012Top24.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0clPDTR4h0F1rq0pgbFVxBLIwdvcmVFBrTMpgeUs_AzvdOuOHwEXm2-auYztDzNrr_7ksNoCAEtLQIVorCQNp4BOPzQZvWwsMWZlkUw92fnBOYqYLiw1yNUXjcwUvSlmBkL4KSw94oNA/s320/AI2012Top24.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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It's been a long and extremely boring process, but the audition phase is finally over, and we have our <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&ved=0CEEQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.americanidol.com%2F&ei=EPdLT5eLBsGtsQKy2dnqCA&usg=AFQjCNHdWVBpqtJLoV-vcVKym3EjOsaklQ&sig2=P8HI-c9FymIhMLZnj-Hnxw" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&ved=0CEEQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.americanidol.com%2F&ei=EPdLT5eLBsGtsQKy2dnqCA&usg=AFQjCNHdWVBpqtJLoV-vcVKym3EjOsaklQ&sig2=P8HI-c9FymIhMLZnj-Hnxw" target="_blank">top 24 Idol contestants for 2012</a> . Whether you agree with the choices or not, they're here, and they're all going to be vying for your votes. They've also added to the drama by announcing that a 25th contestant will be added by way of a 13th male contestant. Idol is definitely reaching for the stars this year, only it's kind-of like watching the Kardashians, but slightly less ridiculous.</div>
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It took three hours, two nights, and more stalling and dramatic antics from the <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CCsQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FAmerican_Idol_(season_11)&ei=r_dLT9HFEaOqsQLCn-DqCA&usg=AFQjCNE_7suiwUwaT8FLg0ESFSk00ZluPw&sig2=fTxb2WLgA8ws-0k_ZhQdQA" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CCsQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FAmerican_Idol_(season_11)&ei=r_dLT9HFEaOqsQLCn-DqCA&usg=AFQjCNE_7suiwUwaT8FLg0ESFSk00ZluPw&sig2=fTxb2WLgA8ws-0k_ZhQdQA" target="_blank">judges</a>, to get here. There are some I was more than happy to see go through (Heejun fan girl, right here), and some I was left in complete wonderment over. The 13th guy will be announced Tuesday, February 28th, I'm assuming before the start of the first male competition. There were four choices shown as a teaser, and one of them was eliminated rather early (Johnny Keyser), so I'm assuming it'll be him. </div>
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As long as it's not Cowboy, I'll be good.</div>
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<strong>Top 12 Guys</strong></div>
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<li>Heejun Han</li>
<li>Adam Brock</li>
<li>Phil Phillips</li>
<li>Reed Grimm</li>
<li>Joshua Ledet</li>
<li>Eban Franckewitz</li>
<li>Colton Dixon</li>
<li>Creighton Fraker</li>
<li>Jeremy Rosado</li>
<li>DeAndre Brackensick</li>
<li>Chase Likens</li>
<li>Aaron Marcellus</li>
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<strong>Top 12 Girls</strong></div>
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<li>Hallie Day</li>
<li>Jennifer Hirsh</li>
<li>Jessica Sanchez</li>
<li>Baylie Brown</li>
<li>Chelsea Sorrell</li>
<li>Elise Testone</li>
<li>Skylar Laine</li>
<li>Haley Johnsen</li>
<li>Shannon Margrane</li>
<li>Brielle Von Hugel</li>
<li>Erika Van Pelt</li>
<li>Hollie Cavanagh</li>
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The choices made my the judges have left me grasping for an <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&ved=0CEEQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.americanidol.com%2F&ei=EPdLT5eLBsGtsQKy2dnqCA&usg=AFQjCNHdWVBpqtJLoV-vcVKym3EjOsaklQ&sig2=P8HI-c9FymIhMLZnj-Hnxw" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&ved=0CEEQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.americanidol.com%2F&ei=EPdLT5eLBsGtsQKy2dnqCA&usg=AFQjCNHdWVBpqtJLoV-vcVKym3EjOsaklQ&sig2=P8HI-c9FymIhMLZnj-Hnxw" target="_blank">idol</a> like Kelly Clarkson, for sure. She was a one-time find, and I don't really think anyone is taking this competition seriously anymore. I was quite happy to find Lauren Gray out, however, because she's no Adele. They made that comparison and I found it laughable. While I'm not a huge Adele fan, let's get real here: Do you really see Lauren Gray winning an armful of Grammys? I don't.</div>
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The three hours it took to announce these names included lots of commercials, ridiculously long pauses and comments from the judges, tears from both guys and girls, recaps of their final performances (which made me cringe most of the time), looks back that could've been shorter, and Steven Tyler getting down to his boxers and taking a dip in the pool surrounding the stage. Apparently, last year J Lo had an issue with letting people go. This year, it looks like she put that all behind her, and only showed a little emotion.</div>
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Needless to say, this year has been rampant with ups and downs. From what I've seen on social media outlets, people are not loving these <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=6&ved=0CGEQFjAF&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.washingtonpost.com%2Fblogs%2Ftv-column%2Fpost%2Famerican-idol-2012-and-the-top-24-are%2F2012%2F02%2F23%2FgIQAsLc0WR_blog.html&ei=EPdLT5eLBsGtsQKy2dnqCA&usg=AFQjCNEY3UUd6ueqfR1kEe_ki7Kwhw4XcQ&sig2=K9Sp5TTyHSl9_lJvJ2Ms3A" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=6&ved=0CGEQFjAF&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.washingtonpost.com%2Fblogs%2Ftv-column%2Fpost%2Famerican-idol-2012-and-the-top-24-are%2F2012%2F02%2F23%2FgIQAsLc0WR_blog.html&ei=EPdLT5eLBsGtsQKy2dnqCA&usg=AFQjCNEY3UUd6ueqfR1kEe_ki7Kwhw4XcQ&sig2=K9Sp5TTyHSl9_lJvJ2Ms3A" target="_blank">contestants</a>. There are some diamonds in the rough, but for the most part, it's all about the drama this season. They're more like a television show than a competition now, and it's showing. I realize that the producers have to look out for their interests, but I think it would serve them better to find actual talent to boost the ratings.</div>
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I'm hoping that the rest of the season fares better for the masses, seeing as how we'll be in charge of making the decisions from here on out. I know who my votes are going to, do you?</div>
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Hopefully happy watching, folks!</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-80136440153196071752012-03-26T13:08:00.000-04:002012-03-26T13:08:18.949-04:00A Letter To Bad Drivers: This One's For You<br />
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I had some requests to do another rant, so this week, we're taking a look at <a data-mce-href="http://www.platewire.com/" href="http://www.platewire.com/" target="_blank">bad drivers</a>. I'm going to make it a letter so everyone can print if off, highlight the appropriate section, and hand it to anyone that you think needs to see it. Who knows, it could save some <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=8&ved=0CG8QFjAH&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.roadragers.com%2F&ei=nYhOT8XLH4yGsgL0-_0Z&usg=AFQjCNFY5HA_Q4b_lqf4j__bcxZSgVNV7g&sig2=EH_xP-P0NESFqBJ0hhfmlw" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=8&ved=0CG8QFjAH&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.roadragers.com%2F&ei=nYhOT8XLH4yGsgL0-_0Z&usg=AFQjCNFY5HA_Q4b_lqf4j__bcxZSgVNV7g&sig2=EH_xP-P0NESFqBJ0hhfmlw" target="_blank">rage</a>, a life, or just make you feel better. Awareness should never be overrated.</div>
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Dear <a data-mce-href="http://www.platewire.com/" href="http://www.platewire.com/" target="_blank">Bad Drivers</a>,</div>
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Hi there! I know we don't really know each other, but I hope this letter changes that. Here you are, reading it, and here I am, writing it. We're already closer; we're like two peas in a pod. If you want a little more of a connection, I can tell you that I enjoy long walks on the beach and zombie apocalypse preparedness. I also enjoy unicorns and drinking coffee while sitting on my front porch. Do you feel like we're friends now? You totally should. I rarely share my love of porches and unicorns, but I shared with you. That's friendship, right there.</div>
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Now, since we are friends and all, I want to talk to you about something very close to my heart. That's what friends do, they share things. I want to talk to you about your driving, and all the things you do that piss me off. It's not just you, but since we're friends, I'm going to tell you. Maybe you can spread it to all your other friends, who I'm sure are <a data-mce-href="http://www.zapatag.com/" href="http://www.zapatag.com/" target="_blank">bad drivers</a>, just like you. Shhh, it's okay. This will be easy. Just let it happen.</div>
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I want to talk to you about your innate ability to completely ignore everything going on outside of your car/truck. How do you do that? I know that must take some talent, so I'm giving you props on it to soften the blow of my words. Props. Okay, I gave you props, now hear me out: I listen to my radio, loudly, every time I get into my truck. There's something to be said for the joy that I get from blaring my music and driving with my windows down. Yet, somehow, even with my windows up, I am still aware that I am not the only person on the road, and there are other cars and things happening outside of mine. I hear sirens, I see other drivers, I notice things like driveways and turn-outs from stores, and I notice you, not noticing. It bothers me. A lot.</div>
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You sit there, in your car/truck, and block turn-outs and intersections; you don't get over for emergency vehicles, or pull over for funeral processions; you have a blatant disregard for the turning of traffic lights and the personal space of any car you get behind. You are annoyingly oblivious to the fact that other people use roads to commute from place-to-place. I don't know how you manage to do all this while driving, and still maintain a dent-free vehicle, but you do, and I hate you for it. We're still friends, right? I have more talking I want to do with you, new friend.</div>
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Now, I know that you think you're super cool, in your fancy new ride, with your fancy new paint job and your rims that cost more than my house, but you're just like everyone else. You have to maintain speed limits just like the rest of us. When you're driving along at 45 in a 55, and a passing lane opens up, people behind you (that you don't notice because of the aforementioned reasons) are going to want to pass you. It's rude to put your pedal to the floor for the minute or so that the lane is opened, getting to a proper speed, only to slow down again when the chance to get around you is gone. I really want to ram you when you do this, and I don't mean in a pleasing way. I just don't get why this is fun for you.</div>
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I also want to let you know that it really upsets me when you tailgate me. I am usually going at least 7 miles over the speed limit, so I know that I am doing my part to be safe, while still maintaining an appropriate speed. I check my mirrors and I find your windshield to be the only thing that's visible. Would you like my blood type and family history? I mean, you're getting rather close, don't you think? I'll invite you to supper with my folks if you'd like, but there are better ways to be "on me" than tailgating.</div>
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Since we're on the subject of tailgating, I would like to mention the fact that flying up on me, passing me, and slowing down to below my current speed, is not only completely uncalled for, but overly annoying. </div>
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This particularly bothers me when I am on the interstate. The speed limit is usually 70, and I am usually going well over that if I'm in the fast lane. Now, I understand that you are probably in a hurry, when I see that you're advancing on my rear end quickly and with purpose. What I do not understand, is how passing me and then slowing down is helping you get to your destination faster. Do you just want to mess with me? Are you in a bad mood, wanting to take it out on unsuspecting anonymous drivers? I'm not sure how that helps, but to each his own I guess.</div>
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The subject of interstate driving brings up a few more points I'd like to touch on in this letter, dearest new friend. I hope I am still able to call you that. Let's start with off ramps. When you get on them, please use the time, and distance, you're given wisely. Get up to the proper speed for a smooth transition into oncoming traffic. Stopping at the end abruptly is only slowing the process down, and can cause your car, and quite possibly your body, great harm. They are made to be conducive to an "ease of flow", and you're making it not-so easy. Please remember this the next time you hop onto one. Merging smoothly is your friend, not your foe.</div>
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This also applies to exit ramps. They are there for you to merge onto, and slow down, without disrupting the traffic flow on the interstate. I promise it's long enough, and you should have no trouble reaching a stop at the end. When you slow down on the interstate, you're slowing down people that aren't expecting to be slowed down. They may hit you, dear friend, or be a part of a huge pile-up that hurts a lot of people. It's not safe for you, it's not safe for me, and it's annoying as hell.</div>
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See? We're opening communication. You are such a good friend for listening, and I am such a good friend for informing you. I hope that we can keep this up, new friend. I have more to talk with you about.</div>
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Like why you feel it's necessary to leave 5 car lengths in between you and the car in front of you at a red light. When you and all your <a data-mce-href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=4&ved=0CFQQFjAD&url=http%3A%2F%2Fbaddriverblog.com%2F&ei=2YlOT4iDPImpsQL_sb37Dw&usg=AFQjCNHkOjWgJPYACJ423fQgpg43BznKAQ&sig2=X3RTwEPFeM5fuCR3nC5q9g" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=4&ved=0CFQQFjAD&url=http%3A%2F%2Fbaddriverblog.com%2F&ei=2YlOT4iDPImpsQL_sb37Dw&usg=AFQjCNHkOjWgJPYACJ423fQgpg43BznKAQ&sig2=X3RTwEPFeM5fuCR3nC5q9g" target="_blank">bad driver</a> friends do this, it makes for a big angry mess for the people behind you. I miss the light, and am stuck waiting again. One of these days, someone is going to hunt you down, and beat the crap out of you. I don't want to see a friend get hurt, but if I see it, I'm not going to step in. Unless it's to help. Because OMFGIWANTTOHITYOUTOO!</div>
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When you do all of these things I've talked about, I want to harm you. I get <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Road_rage" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Road_rage" target="_blank">road rage</a>, not because I'm a mean person, but because you make it impossible for me to enjoy driving. I love it, and you're ruining it. If you were on fire, and I had a glass of water, I would drink it. That's how mad you make me. Is that any way to treat your new-found friend? No, no it is not.</div>
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I don't care if you're <a data-mce-href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cv0HkM0XiBs" href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cv0HkM0XiBs" target="_blank">female drivers</a>, <a data-mce-href="http://helpguide.org/elder/senior_citizen_driving.htm" href="http://helpguide.org/elder/senior_citizen_driving.htm" target="_blank">elderly drivers</a>, <a data-mce-href="https://www.yd.com/default.aspx" href="https://www.yd.com/default.aspx" target="_blank">young drivers</a>, part of the angry <a data-mce-href="http://editorial.autos.msn.com/article.aspx?cp-documentid=788126" href="http://editorial.autos.msn.com/article.aspx?cp-documentid=788126" target="_blank">men drivers</a> population, or just some jack ass that should never have been given a <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Driver's_license" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Driver's_license" target="_blank">driver's license</a>. If you do any of these things, you're on my list of people to hate. Male or <a data-mce-href="http://www.break.com/index/best-female-driver-ever.html" href="http://www.break.com/index/best-female-driver-ever.html" target="_blank">female driver</a>, <a data-mce-href="http://www.teendriving.com/" href="http://www.teendriving.com/" target="_blank">new driver</a> or old, you should respect the fact that a car/truck is just an over-sized tool; if you use it improperly, you're going to hurt yourself or others. I'm more worried about others, because I have a kid. If you were to cause me harm because you're incapable of driving with any common sense, it would be the last mistake you ever made.</div>
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Best wishes and hopes for a more conscientious look at <a data-mce-href="http://www.aaafoundation.org/resources/index.cfm?button=AggressiveDriving&gclid=CLG-upn3w64CFcSe7QodDw0JUA" href="http://www.aaafoundation.org/resources/index.cfm?button=AggressiveDriving&gclid=CLG-upn3w64CFcSe7QodDw0JUA" target="_blank">driving safety</a>,</div>
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Kate</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-53172515887039039332012-03-26T12:59:00.000-04:002012-03-26T12:59:00.345-04:00American Idol: Top 25 Week<br />
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This week, on <a data-mce-href="http://www.americanidol.com/" href="http://www.americanidol.com/" target="_blank">American Idol</a>, I realize that I'm wasting my time. Other than that, we see the <a data-mce-href="http://www.wetpaint.com/american-idol/articles/watch-all-the-top-13-guys-performances-from-american-idol-on-february-28-2012" href="http://www.wetpaint.com/american-idol/articles/watch-all-the-top-13-guys-performances-from-american-idol-on-february-28-2012" target="_blank">top 13 guys</a> and <a data-mce-href="http://popwatch.ew.com/2012/03/01/american-idol-top-12-girls-on-the-scene/" href="http://popwatch.ew.com/2012/03/01/american-idol-top-12-girls-on-the-scene/" target="_blank">top 12 girls</a> belting it out for a spot in the top 13 (all together). Or is it top 12? I don't know, who can actually keep up with <a data-mce-href="http://ryanseacrest.com/" href="http://ryanseacrest.com/" target="_blank">Ryan Seacrest</a>? Not me.</div>
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The week started off with the boys performing on Tuesday. There were some good ones, but it was mostly just annoying. I definitely kept my bottle of Excedrin Migraine open and ready on my desk. I just can't decide if the <a data-mce-href="http://www.nydailynews.com/gossip/american-idol-judge-steven-tyler-teases-jennifer-lopez-oscars-wardrobe-malfunction-article-1.1030461" href="http://www.nydailynews.com/gossip/american-idol-judge-steven-tyler-teases-jennifer-lopez-oscars-wardrobe-malfunction-article-1.1030461">Idol judges</a> really think some of these people can sing, or if they are all just getting older and have lost some of their hearing. I'm going with the latter, because it's the nice explanation.</div>
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First up, it's good old <a data-mce-href="http://www.wetpaint.com/american-idol/articles/who-is-reed-grimm-american-idol-season-11-contestant-background-info" href="http://www.wetpaint.com/american-idol/articles/who-is-reed-grimm-american-idol-season-11-contestant-background-info" target="_blank">Reed Grimm</a>. His performance? It wasn't so good. I don't know if a blues version of "Moves Like Jagger" was really the direction he needed to go in, but he did, and it was definitely a wrong turn. Let's not forget that they had to bleep him on a supposed family show. You can easily change the words, so I wouldn't forget that next time, Reed. Also, I wouldn't pick a rather catchy pop song and turn it into.. I don't even know what that was.</div>
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Next up, we see <a data-mce-href="http://www.pittsburghlive.com/x/pittsburghtrib/ae/s_783466.html" href="http://www.pittsburghlive.com/x/pittsburghtrib/ae/s_783466.html" target="_blank">Adam Brock</a> completely kill "Freedom". I mean that in the best way possible, because, aside from a few slip ups, he did amazing. "White Chocolate" brought down the house and everyone cheered. I don't need my Excedrin just yet, so I go on to the next set of hopefuls.</div>
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Here we have <a data-mce-href="http://www.americanidol.com/videos/season_10/road_to_hollywood/deandre_brackensick/" href="http://www.americanidol.com/videos/season_10/road_to_hollywood/deandre_brackensick/" target="_blank">DeAndre Brackensick</a>. I can't even remember what he sang, because it was so excruciatingly painful, I was eating Excedrin like Skittles. How that boy, and his hair, were ever considered talented, I'll never know. I just hope this week was the last time I'll ever have to resort to the fetal position to make it through his performance.</div>
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After DeAndre, we see <a data-mce-href="http://coltondixon.com/" href="http://coltondixon.com/" target="_blank">Colton Dixon</a>, or as my husband calls him, The Skunk. He took on Hayley Williams, and sang "Decode" by <a data-mce-href="http://www.paramore.net/" href="http://www.paramore.net/" target="_blank">Paramore</a>. It was even worse than DeAndre's fail, if you can imagine that. I don't go for Twilight, which is what that song was written for, but I love me some Paramore. It was just wrong. He may have the look, but his sister will always be better than him, and that boy can't sing.</div>
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At this point, I'm still waiting for that "Surprise 13th Male Contestant" that they are holding out, and praying that it's not Cowboy. If it is, I quit. Completely.</div>
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Up next is <a data-mce-href="http://www.wetpaint.com/american-idol/articles/who-is-jeremy-rosado-american-idol-2012-contestant-background-info" href="http://www.wetpaint.com/american-idol/articles/who-is-jeremy-rosado-american-idol-2012-contestant-background-info" target="_blank">Jeremy Rosado</a>, the king of atrocious pronunciation. Now, I know I sound mean, but damn. It's a rampant problem on <a data-mce-href="http://www.americanidol.com/" href="http://www.americanidol.com/" target="_blank">Idol</a>. No one has any grasp of how to enunciate their speech. If I can't understand you, I'm not going to pay attention. I'm not going to want to listen to someone singing like they're doing drunk karaoke. I'm sorry that I'm not sorry. If Idol is really looking for stars, they should take a note from my middle school chorus teacher, and find someone who doesn't sound like they're a herd of cattle, "chew"-ing all over the place. "I wanCHEW, I won't leCHEW", it's all the same thing. Enunciate. Please. And learn how to sing. That might help you, too. Also, giving him a nickname like "Jer-Bear" isn't helping his cause. No, no, no, <a data-mce-href="http://www.jenniferlopezonline.com/" href="http://www.jenniferlopezonline.com/" target="_blank">JLo</a>. Just.. no.</div>
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After the enunciation fails of Jeremy, we find ourselves watching <a data-mce-href="http://www.wetpaint.com/american-idol/video/watch-chase-likens-sing-storm-warning-in-american-idol-2012-semifinals-on-february-28" href="http://www.wetpaint.com/american-idol/video/watch-chase-likens-sing-storm-warning-in-american-idol-2012-semifinals-on-february-28" target="_blank">Chase Likens</a> take on "Storm Warning" by Hunter Hayes. It wasn't that bad, so I wasn't reaching for the Excedrin. It wasn't the best thing I've ever heard, but at least I could listen to it and only cringe a moderate amount of the time. The made Brendan Fraiser references concerning his looks, the crowd went nuts, we're apparently mummies at home.</div>
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Now we're listening to the musical stylings of <a data-mce-href="http://www.creightonfraker.com/" href="http://www.creightonfraker.com/" target="_blank">Creighton Fraker</a>. He's one of the creepiest looking dudes I've seen in a while, I'm not going to lie. If he stays away from those high notes, however, he's got some real talent. He forces them, and they don't sound so hot. I got an angry supporter on my Twitter, and it was hilarious to see that she couldn't take time out of her busy hate schedule to read the tweets after the "creepy" comment I made. Oh, haters, how I love thee. Without you guys, Twitter would be boring.</div>
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Still waiting on that announcement.. this seems to be taking forever, and I'm not amused.</div>
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We're up to good ol' <a data-mce-href="http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1677534/phillip-phillips-american-idol.jhtml" href="http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1677534/phillip-phillips-american-idol.jhtml" target="_blank">Phillip Phillips</a>. Man, I like his style. He gave us "In The Air Tonight" by Phil Collins. Now, this is one of my all-time favorite songs. I love it. I was so upset when I found out Nonpoint was covering it, until I heard them blow it out of the water. Phil, Phil, Phil.. you blew it. It was definitely the first time he's disappointed me so far this season, and it kills me that it was while butchering such an awesome song. Mike Tyson did a better job in <em>The Hangover</em>. Don't do it again, Phil. I might have to punch you in the man part.</div>
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After being mad at Phil, I have to listen to <a data-mce-href="http://www.wetpaint.com/american-idol/video/watch-eben-franckewitz-sing-adeles-set-fire-to-the-rain-in-american-idol-2012-semifinals-on-february-28" href="http://www.wetpaint.com/american-idol/video/watch-eben-franckewitz-sing-adeles-set-fire-to-the-rain-in-american-idol-2012-semifinals-on-february-28" target="_blank">Eben Franckewitz</a>. And he's taking on <a data-mce-href="http://www.adele.tv/" href="http://www.adele.tv/" target="_blank">Adele's</a> "Set Fire To The Rain". I'm not an Adele fan, per say, but I do know that the woman has insane talent. I can't deny that she's made her mark before going under the knife, with, what was it? Six Grammys? Eight? Eben, what were you thinking? Oh my LAWD, that was awful. It was worse than Colton AND DeAndre combined. And the judges? They're lacking in actual judgement this season, because they gushed over it. It was flat, it was pitchy, and it was just generally craptastic. I should give him props for being both at the same time, but I'm on an Excedrin-enduced high right about now. Yuck.</div>
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Now we're up to my personal favorite, <a data-mce-href="http://www.allkpop.com/2012/02/korean-american-hopeful-heejun-han-impresses-once-again-on-american-idol" href="http://www.allkpop.com/2012/02/korean-american-hopeful-heejun-han-impresses-once-again-on-american-idol" target="_blank">Heejun Han</a>. He's going after gold with the most awesome version of "Angels" I've ever heard. I will admit that he had a few slips, but wow. Jessica Simpson is crying into her peanut butter and pickle sandwich right about now, because he killed it. Insanity. I love his voice; it still shocks me every time he belts a song out. He's got something special, and I hope that he makes it somewhere. Team Heejun, for sure!</div>
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Up next! <a data-mce-href="http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1680135/american-idol-joshua-ledet.jhtml" href="http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1680135/american-idol-joshua-ledet.jhtml" target="_blank">Joshua Ledet</a>! He's taking on J. Hud's song "You Pulled Me Through", and he's taking over. Wow. His ability to switch keys is just insanity. He was so good, I almost tossed my bottle of Excedrin out with the trash. He definitely lead the pack, and made the bad parts of the night drift away. I can't believe that he's not getting more credit for being truly talented. I can see him being in the tippy-top of the competition this year, for sure.</div>
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FINALLY! The announcement of the 13th male contestant. Who is it? <a data-mce-href="http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=147610676" href="http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=147610676" target="_blank">Jermaine Jones</a>! I'm so glad they brought his smooth baritone back. I love listening to it. Mama's boy is getting down on Idol this year, and it's surprisingly refreshing. He's got that Barry White thing going on and I love it. He's singing his heart out with a Luther Vandross song, and he nailed it. It was awesome. I know he's not the "typical idol", but he's special in his own way.</div>
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Thankfully, I only slightly overdosed on Excedrin during the guy's night on the stage. Stand outs to me were definitely Joshua Ledet, Heejun Han, Creighton Fraker (even though I think his song choice was a little off. True Colors? Really dude?), Adam Brock, and Jermaine Jones. Good job, and good luck, guys!</div>
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On Wednesday, we tuned in to <a data-mce-href="http://www.americanidol.com/" href="http://www.americanidol.com/" target="_blank">Idol</a> and watched the 12 girls battle it out. I went out and bought an extra bottle of Excedrin, just in case, and man, am I glad I did. Yikes.</div>
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First up, we settle in and listen to <a data-mce-href="http://www.chelseasorrell.com/" href="http://www.chelseasorrell.com/" target="_blank">Chelsea Sorrell</a>, and her rendition of "<a data-mce-href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oM7NQQ0Lfu4" href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oM7NQQ0Lfu4" target="_blank">Cowboy Casanova</a>". Yep, that's all I've got. It was baaaaaaad. I'm already hitting the Excedrin like I've got an addiction. It's the first performance of the night. I'm a little worried at this point.</div>
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Moving on, we find ourselves watching <a data-mce-href="http://erikavanpelt.com/" href="http://erikavanpelt.com/" target="_blank">Erika Van Pelt</a> sing "What About Love". It wasn't the worst of the night, but it was far from the best. I hope she's a really good DJ, because I'm pretty sure she's going back to it, unless someone decides they want her to record an autotuned album.</div>
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But, wait! Isn't that what they're all looking to score? That seems to be the standard these days, right?</div>
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Next up: <a data-mce-href="http://www.jenhirsh.com/" href="http://www.jenhirsh.com/" target="_blank">Jen Hirsh</a>. She's giving us some more Adele, as if last night wasn't bad enough, in the form of "One And Only". It's one of the worst performances of the night, but not the only. Ha. I'm good at this. The judges are still not up for judging, but I have hope for the rest of the night as I pop more Excedrin, washed down with shame and Dr. Pepper.</div>
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We move on to <a data-mce-href="http://www.facebook.com/BVonHugelAI11" href="http://www.facebook.com/BVonHugelAI11" target="_blank">Brielle Von Hugel</a>, and wish we had ear plugs. Oh, please, say it ain't so; she's going to sing "Dock of the Bay" by the legend, Otis Redding. She ruined it. Completely. Not only was her dress atrocious, but her voice, and the way she sang the song, were just as awful, and worse. This is why I don't like <a data-mce-href="http://www.americanidol.com/" href="http://www.americanidol.com/" target="_blank">American Idol</a>. They're constantly destroying my favorite songs, relishing in the reckless abandon they do it with. And when Steven told her she had a great handle on Blues, I died a little inside. My kidneys are also dying from all the Excedrin. It's a bad night.</div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pwoeawvxnzg" href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pwoeawvxnzg" target="_blank">Hallie Day</a> graces us with her stage presence next, and belts out "Feeling Good". I was not feeling good after she finished. Randy, Al Roker, whatever his name is, pulls it out and criticizes her, asking her where she thinks she fits as a singer. I agree with him, for the first time all season. It's time to drink up to honesty, as I slam back more Excedrin and shame.</div>
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After Hallie, we get a whole 'lotta <a data-mce-href="http://www.facebook.com/SLaineAI11" href="http://www.facebook.com/SLaineAI11" target="_blank">Skylar Laine</a>. She goes after Faces' "Stay With Me" and starts convulsing on stage. Oh, that was supposed to be dancing? Yeah, I missed that connection. Thanks for catching it! I'll remember that the next time she's shaking her hands all in her own face while singing. Bottom's up, America! Drink to the dress, if nothing else, and put the Excedrin down. It will eventually kick in, right? One more Reba comparison, and I think I'll just go off the deep end, and watch The Voice.</div>
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More country crooning follows with <a data-mce-href="http://www.bayliebrown.net/" href="http://www.bayliebrown.net/" target="_blank">Baylie Brown</a>. She's going for the glory with Lonestar's "Amazed". She falls short of even the bronze, because she starts off with no control. She finishes, all excited because she's there on stage and she thinks she nailed it. Nope, not even close. The judges praise her, with mild critiques. I pretend I'm watching something amazing, and try to forget that I'm actually wasting my time with Idol.</div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://www.americanidol.com/videos/season_11/hollie_cavanagh/" href="http://www.americanidol.com/videos/season_11/hollie_cavanagh/" target="_blank">Hollie Cavanagh</a> takes the stage and sings her little heart out to "Reflection". No one should ever try to take on Christina, I'm just sayin'. It wasn't good, and that's all I have to say about that.</div>
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Following Hollie is <a data-mce-href="http://haleyjohnsenfansite.org/" href="http://haleyjohnsenfansite.org/" target="_blank">Haley Johnsen</a>, with the worst version of "Sweet Dreams" I have ever heard. It's another one of those songs that I love, and it's ruined. She murdered Annie Lennox, and I'm almost certain there should be some kind of law against performances that bad. <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Randy_Jackson" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Randy_Jackson" target="_blank">Randy</a> came through for me, and trashed it. Finally, some real judging. I found her whining backstage about how "hurtful" his comments were annoying, when they were well-deserved. How did she get this far again?</div>
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After the crime scene is cleaned up, we find <a data-mce-href="http://www.wetpaint.com/american-idol/articles/who-is-shannon-magrane-american-idol-2012-contestant-background-info" href="http://www.wetpaint.com/american-idol/articles/who-is-shannon-magrane-american-idol-2012-contestant-background-info" target="_blank">Shannon Magrane</a> on stage. She got rave reviews for a mediocre rendition of "Go Light Your World". I guess I'm alone in hearing the shortcomings? And let's not even mention the recurring of the <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Steven_Tyler" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Steven_Tyler" target="_blank">Steven</a> vs <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joe_Magrane" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joe_Magrane" target="_blank">Dad</a> thing, because it just makes me want more Excedrin and a nap.</div>
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Jennifer Hudson is under attack again, this time from <a data-mce-href="http://www.americanidol.com/videos/season_11/meet_semifinalists/jessica_sanchez/" href="http://www.americanidol.com/videos/season_11/meet_semifinalists/jessica_sanchez/" target="_blank">Jessica Sanchez</a>. Apparently, her vocal cords were all jacked up, and she skipped out on rehearsals. She got through "I Love You I Do", and I found it underwhelming. It wasn't terrible, but it wasn't the rave performance that the judges were saying it was. There are just some singers that they shouldn't be allowed to take on, and I'm adding J Hud to the list. I'm sorry, but it wasn't that good. At all.</div>
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The night ended on a positive note for me, however, when <a data-mce-href="http://www.facebook.com/elisetestone" href="http://www.facebook.com/elisetestone" target="_blank">Elise Testone</a> took on Adele's "One And Only". I am not saying it was the best performance of the night, seeing as how none of them were good, but it was the only time I heard someone sing Adele and not try to BE Adele. She turned the song into her own, and while it was underwhelming, it was better than butchering it to shreds. I'm thankful that she at least put some effort into tuning it to her strengths, and if it hadn't been for all the breaking in her voice, she would've nailed her version of it.</div>
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Good luck, ladies -- I know I didn't waste one single second voting for any of you, so I hope someone did.</div>
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Here's to hoping that the good ones stay, and the bad ones get sent home.</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-85840264000181990372012-03-26T12:35:00.000-04:002012-03-26T12:36:37.469-04:00My Take On Your Take On Chicks Who Game<br />
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Hi, I'm Kate, and I'm (obviously) a chick. I am a chick who games; I mean, I really game.</div>
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I don't pose half-naked with my controller for Facebook pictures and I don't play those ridiculous "take care of this baby animal" games on my hot pink DS. I don't even have a DS, truth be told; I have a first-gen PSP. I have been known to sit on a couch for days on end -- no shower, no sleep, no food -- and play KOTOR until my eyeballs were almost literally bleeding. I used to think budgeting for a new game was the most important financial decision I would make that week, and I made grown men cry as they watched me blow through Halo 2 on Legendary with no deaths and no do-overs.</div>
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I really hate the stereotypes that come with being a girl who loves video games. This week's rant is all about them. If you're a dude, a chick, or a unicorn on a mission from the Deep Sea, you might want to take a look at this. Make an informed decision on REAL chicks who play video games, please and thanks.</div>
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<strong>Yes, I am a nerd. No, I am not ugly.</strong></div>
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Most people assume, while they sit there and judge "real girl gamers", that we must be troglodytes. Nope. Not true. I may be a nerd, but that doesn't mean I'm some hideous beast, donning my viking helmet and my coke-bottle specs, quoting Star Trek and swooning over a first edition Batman comic like I'm a character from Lord of the Rings. I'm a normal chick, quoting Star Trek in my coke bottle glasses and viking helmet, swooning over a first edition Batman comic. I game because I love it. I've gloriously wasted days, weeks, and months of my life, playing <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Final_Fantasy" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Final_Fantasy">Final Fantasy</a>, <a data-mce-href="http://halo.xbox.com/en-us/?" href="http://halo.xbox.com/en-us/?">Halo</a>, <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fable_(video_game)" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fable_(video_game)">Fable</a>, <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mass_Effect" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mass_Effect">Mass Effect</a>, <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Silent_Hill" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Silent_Hill">Silent Hill</a>, <a data-mce-href="http://www.residentevil.com/agegate.php" href="http://www.residentevil.com/agegate.php">Resident Evil</a>, <a data-mce-href="http://mariokart7.nintendo.com/" href="http://mariokart7.nintendo.com/">Mario Kart</a>, <a data-mce-href="http://www.elderscrolls.com/" href="http://www.elderscrolls.com/">Elder Scrolls</a>, and any other game I can get my hands on. I don't have to be some ugly weirdo to be a true gamer. PEOPLE, Y U BE HATING?! Jeez Louise.</div>
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<strong>Girl Gamers Use Their Sex Appeal To Get Attention</strong></div>
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<dt class="wp-caption-dt"><a data-mce-href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/REALgamerchick.jpg" href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/REALgamerchick.jpg"><img alt="" class="size-thumbnail wp-image-1814 " data-mce-src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/REALgamerchick-150x150.jpg" height="150" src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/REALgamerchick-150x150.jpg" style="border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;" title="REALgamerchick" width="150" /></a></dt>
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Not true. Usually, I use my charming asshole disposition and a fake mustache to do that. I don't need my boobs or a skimpy outfit, thanks. I can sit on a couch and gain respect for my skills, for your information. My looks are useless when it comes to gaming; my skills, however, are infinitely useful. I gained a lot of friends and memories battling it out with the boys to <a data-mce-href="http://www.lucasarts.com/games/swbattlefrontii/indexFlash.html" href="http://www.lucasarts.com/games/swbattlefrontii/indexFlash.html">Star Wars: Battlefront II</a>. Those were some good times. I didn't use my boobs to mash buttons, I used my abnormally tiny hands. I was probably wearing a <a data-mce-href="http://www.dragonballz.com/" href="http://www.dragonballz.com/">Dragon Ball Z</a> shirt and hadn't shaved my legs. I'm pretty sure that's not using my "rack" or my "sex appeal" to game it up with others. Actually, it's pretty gross, but it's the truth.</div>
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<strong>Girl Gamers Only Play Stupid Games/With A Pink Controller</strong></div>
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Um, huh? Come again? No, guy. No. I have NEVER once in my entire gaming life owned a <a data-mce-href="http://www.amazon.com/Xbox-360-Wireless-Controller-Pink/dp/B000VSDON6" href="http://www.amazon.com/Xbox-360-Wireless-Controller-Pink/dp/B000VSDON6">pink controller</a>. They annoy me. They're all this baby shower pink color, and that's just not my scene. My controller is black and white, with a really kick-ass design on it. I also have several controllers that are just plain ones that came with the system of choice. And as for the "<a data-mce-href="http://mistupid.com/games/index.htm" href="http://mistupid.com/games/index.htm">stupid games</a>", you won't find a single game that has anything to do with babies, fashion, mini pets, bakeries, jewelry, Barbies, or pop star life, anywhere in my collection. I don't roll that way. I prefer FPS or RPGs. The only animal I play with is my dog on Fable II and III. Also, I don't abhor the color pink, but I don't tend to make everything I own pink because I have lady parts; so, you know, there's that. Do you own lots of blue stuff just because you're a dude? Do you only buy things that are blue because you've got dude parts? Probably not. Shut up.</div>
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<strong>Girls Only Game To Get Guys To Like Them</strong></div>
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Seriously, this one gets me every time. I couldn't care less than I already do who likes me and who doesn't. No boyfriend or girlfriend I ever had cared whether I gamed or not. My husband actually wishes I didn't game, because I take time away from his gaming. I really hate stereotypes, but this one bothers me. I game for the sheer and utter enjoyment I get from it. I love delving deep into a world that's far more interesting than the one I live in. It's my escape, and it's my chill-zone. Some girls may game for that reason, but they aren't gamers. They're "<a data-mce-href="http://www.girlgamer.com/" href="http://www.girlgamer.com/">gamer girls</a>", whereas real chick gamers are just chicks who game. There's a difference. If you want to sit there and whine about chick gamers, whine about the fact that we are usually pwning noobz and telling people to run back to their mommy over LIVE. Come at me bro!</div>
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<strong>All Girl Gamers Think Rikku Is The Best Character Ever</strong></div>
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I hate <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rikku" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rikku">Rikku</a>. I actually laugh at people who cosplay as her. It makes me laugh especially hard to see guys do it. That's all I have to say about that. All my gamer friends that are girls choose other favorites as well. This is a ridiculous stereotype; completely insane. Where did it even come from? I hated those Final Fantasy games. I choose Final Fantasy 11 and Final Fantasy Tactics over them every time. I'm not even sure what to write, like, how did this even start?</div>
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<strong>Girl Gamers Get Attention Because They're Stupid</strong></div>
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<dt class="wp-caption-dt"><a data-mce-href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/lulzzz.jpg" href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/lulzzz.jpg"><img alt="" class="size-thumbnail wp-image-1818" data-mce-src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/lulzzz-150x150.jpg" height="150" src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/lulzzz-150x150.jpg" style="border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;" title="lulzzz" width="150" /></a></dt>
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I have an IQ of 187. I may be a complete ditz at times, but I am extremely intelligent, and I really resent the assumption that I'm stupid because I'm a girl who loves to game. Most of the time, girl gamers get attention because they're taking their clothes off. When girls who actually love to game get attention, they're either famous, or being picked on for not being "sexy" enough. It all comes down to image again. It actually takes a lot of hand/eye coordination and strategy to be a good gamer. Men aren't the only sex that possess these qualities, and anyone that says otherwise is a jackass. The over-sexualization of females in the gaming industry is craziness, and the reason that this is even a problem. Your looks shouldn't merit whether you gain attention for your hobby of choice, and it does make you look stupid to sit there and rub a controller all over your face and chest. That's not what it's intended for, and it's not what you should be doing to get your name out there. Thanks for making us all look like that in society's eyes, chick.</div>
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<strong>Gamer Girls Are So Annoying</strong></div>
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<dl class="wp-caption alignleft" data-mce-style="width: 160px;" id="attachment_1819" style="background-color: #f3f3f3; border-bottom-color: rgb(221, 221, 221); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-bottom-style: solid; border-bottom-width: 1px; border-image: initial; border-left-color: rgb(221, 221, 221); border-left-style: solid; border-left-width: 1px; border-right-color: rgb(221, 221, 221); border-right-style: solid; border-right-width: 1px; border-top-color: rgb(221, 221, 221); border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border-top-style: solid; border-top-width: 1px; float: left; margin-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 10px; padding-top: 4px; text-align: center; width: 160px;">
<dt class="wp-caption-dt"><a data-mce-href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/images2.jpg" href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/images2.jpg"><img alt="" class="size-thumbnail wp-image-1819" data-mce-src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/images2-150x150.jpg" height="150" src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/images2-150x150.jpg" style="border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;" title="images" width="150" /></a></dt>
<dd class="wp-caption-dd" style="font-size: 11px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 5px; padding-left: 4px; padding-right: 4px; padding-top: 0px;">Because PS2 was out when you were 5, right? Riiiiight.</dd></dl>
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Yes. <a data-mce-href="http://www.girlgamer.com/" href="http://www.girlgamer.com/">Gamer girls</a> are completely obnoxious, and they make me want to rip their vocal cords out. Real chicks, who just love to nerd out in front of a console, aren't constantly stating that they're a chick who plays games every five seconds. Usually, we walk into a store or a room, and we're totally normal people. If I enter a room, and people are playing a video game, I'm like "'Sup dude. Whatcha playin'? Ah, cool. Pass me a controller. Fuck a headset, just get me in the game!" Now, a few girls I know, would enter the aforementioned situation something like this: "OMFG! You're playing *insert console here*. I love *insert console here*. I'm totally a gamer. I love gaming! Like, what are you playing? No, I really don't want to play, I just want to watch. I'm here to hang out. Did I mention that I loooooooooooove *insert console here*? Because I do. And I have a vagina. OMG! YAY!" That, my friends, is the real difference. <a data-mce-href="http://www.girlgamer.com/" href="http://www.girlgamer.com/">Gamer girls</a> vs. girls who game. Live it, learn it, and stop lumping all of us in the same category. I bet if you got off your high horse, you'd mob out with me, and have a great time. Also, the next guy to tell me to get back in the kitchen where I belong is getting spawn raped every single time I catch them out on <a data-mce-href="http://www.callofduty.com/" href="http://www.callofduty.com/">COD</a>. My place isn't in the kitchen because I have two X chromosomes. Why don't YOU get YOUR ass in the kitchen and make ME a sandwich? How y'all like me now?</div>
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Next week, we'll rant about something equally insane. Happy gaming, and reading, y'all!</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-59398330603248404382012-03-26T12:23:00.000-04:002012-03-26T12:23:21.826-04:00Multimedia For Kids, Err, My Kid<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEggsJOKjPtNnvA_KcmGvwRx_HwKxcZcyrfcjGp52QlPprAl1aMpAQxhcDeaAHdRu_XrpYr1wtZX4CxRmmp2Ms8OmlcBRTiT57lmxP3UaIKvrl8DMUksJWn_IFN6Ai1XbjEl27CObhNHnlo/s1600/poltergeist-tv-kids.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEggsJOKjPtNnvA_KcmGvwRx_HwKxcZcyrfcjGp52QlPprAl1aMpAQxhcDeaAHdRu_XrpYr1wtZX4CxRmmp2Ms8OmlcBRTiT57lmxP3UaIKvrl8DMUksJWn_IFN6Ai1XbjEl27CObhNHnlo/s1600/poltergeist-tv-kids.jpg" /></a></div>
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As "Mommy" to a <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toddler" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toddler" target="_blank">toddler</a>, I'm not the world's best parent. I'm usually at a loss as to what she wants/needs, but I'm learning as I go, and trying new things every day. I know to give her home-cooked, healthy meals as often as I can, to give her a vitamin, bathe her and brush her teeth, and try not to lose my shit when she won't listen. I also know that a perfectly timed press of the "play" button on my remote will trigger complete and utter concentration in an otherwise unfocused toddler with ADD.</div>
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Yes, my <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toddler" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toddler" target="_blank">TODDLER</a> has ADD. It is possible. She got it from her Dad. And I guess a little bit from me. Anxiety disorders run in my family. She's also OCD like a mo'fo'. I refuse to put her on medication, because I can handle it, but that's beside the point (The point of this being toddlers <em>can </em>be diagnosed with ADD/OCD when it's beyond normal toddler behavior, and I ain't judging your kids!).</div>
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When I go to choose a show or movie, whether it's on <a data-mce-href="http://www.directv.com/DTVAPP/content/directv-tv-deals-2y?CMP=KNC|8|53776329|100022293|Exact&dnaomn=85373,8,0,100022293,803797753,1331754588,drectv,22102712,10274237349" href="http://www.directv.com/DTVAPP/content/directv-tv-deals-2y?CMP=KNC|8|53776329|100022293|Exact&dnaomn=85373,8,0,100022293,803797753,1331754588,drectv,22102712,10274237349" target="_blank">DirecTV</a>, <a data-mce-href="http://movies.netflix.com/WiHome" href="http://movies.netflix.com/WiHome" target="_blank">Netflix</a>, or in the middle of an isle at a store somewhere, I look for certain bullet points, because what she sees matters. The things I tend to check-off my list in my head tend to lean towards:</div>
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<li>Is it something I would want to watch with her?</li>
<li>Is it teaching her something other than how to be a whiny, entitled brat (My Big Big Friend show, anyone?)?</li>
<li>Does it have a message other than "buy this new toy that this company just came out with, but will come out with something far cooler in two weeks, so she'll need that, too"?</li>
<li>Is it <a data-mce-href="http://www.funbrain.com/" href="http://www.funbrain.com/">educational</a>?</li>
<li>Is it "clean"?</li>
<li>Will it drive me insane to listen to?</li>
<li><a data-mce-href="http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/moral" href="http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/moral">Morals</a> check!</li>
<li>Is it entertaining enough for her to grab onto and really enjoy?</li>
<li>Will it make her stop yelling at me???</li>
<li>Will it entertain my husband if I throw it up on the television while he's around?</li>
<li>If she starts repeating what's in the show, will I hang my head in parenting shame, or be proud of my choices in the <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Multimedia" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Multimedia">multimedia</a> she consumes?</li>
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Most parents deal with the same checklist when they're surfing for things that concern their impressionable little munchkins, and if they're anything like me, they're finding it harder and harder to ignore that last bullet up there. I mean, come on, people! This is my CHILD we're talking about. She's not some tool for <a data-mce-href="http://www.brandlogic.com/services/strategy.html?gclid=CP_Yg7eT564CFQrCtgodDj7LjA" href="http://www.brandlogic.com/services/strategy.html?gclid=CP_Yg7eT564CFQrCtgodDj7LjA" target="_blank">brand marketing</a>, she's not your personal billboard, and she's damn sure not a product of parents that don't give a shit what she's seeing.</div>
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Well, she does really enjoy watching <a data-mce-href="http://www.fox.com/bones/" href="http://www.fox.com/bones/" target="_blank">Bones</a>, but that's really just because she's really into the "why" of a situation. That, and she's learning body parts, all while she's asking why getting shot or hitting someone hurts. I don't think there's anything wrong with her asking why people are bad, and why certain things hurt. The more you know, people, the more you know. I know it's not a kid show, but it works for us. She's highly advanced, and that makes me one proud Mama! ::ahem:: Moving on!</div>
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I've recently had to cross some shows off my list that really bummed me out.<em> <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maisy_Mouse" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maisy_Mouse" target="_blank">Maisy</a></em>, for example, is no longer allowed in this house. Seeing the way they choose to portray certain situations left me feeling like I was watching PedoBear make a cartoon. I'm not even kidding, and it's completely pathetic. But! It gets better, y'all, because I replaced it with something way more awesome!</div>
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This is a list of kid tested, <a data-mce-href="http://www.award-winning-healthy-child-products.com/" href="http://www.award-winning-healthy-child-products.com/" target="_blank">mom approved</a> shows that I have found easy to welcome into her life, and the reasons behind my, well, reasoning (We'll touch on movies later; much, MUCH later.):</div>
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<strong>Jane and the Dragon</strong></div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/20061210-janeflag.jpg" href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/20061210-janeflag.jpg"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-thumbnail wp-image-1849" data-mce-src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/20061210-janeflag-150x150.jpg" height="150" src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/20061210-janeflag-150x150.jpg" style="border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; float: left;" title="20061210-janeflag" width="150" /></a>My kiddo love this <a data-mce-href="http://janeandthedragon.com/" href="http://janeandthedragon.com/">show</a>, and so do I. It teaches her how to stand up for herself, no matter what. It shows her that the only thing "expected" of her, is for her to follow her dreams, whatever they may be. It makes her see that people are accountable for their actions, large or small. Also, <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dragon" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dragon" target="_blank">DRAGONS</a>! ARE! COOL! Y'ALL! The show is built around the premise that a girl, supposed to be training as a "lady-in-waiting", is all "No way brohas, I wanna be a <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Knight" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Knight" target="_blank">KNIGHT</a>!", and goes for it. She goes after a dragon all by herself, and winds up befriending it instead of slaying it. Adventures ensue, and while there are bumps in the road, they are all lessons learned. It has taught her to appreciate her parents, no matter how "insignificant" our job titles may be, appreciate friendship in all forms, and some pretty stellar sword-play. It gets my approval because it's full of awesomeness. I found it on <a data-mce-href="http://www.qubo.com/" href="http://www.qubo.com/">Qubo</a>, which is hosted by one of the Ion channels in the morning (on DirecTV). I suggest it to everyone with no reservations. <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dragon" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dragon">Dragons</a>, <a data-mce-href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Knight" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Knight">knights</a>, empowerment for young chicks, what? Yes.</div>
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<strong>Dino Squad</strong></div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/DinoSquad-250.jpg" href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/DinoSquad-250.jpg"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-thumbnail wp-image-1850" data-mce-src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/DinoSquad-250-150x150.jpg" height="150" src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/DinoSquad-250-150x150.jpg" style="border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; float: left;" title="DinoSquad-250" width="150" /></a>This <a data-mce-href="http://www.dinosquad.com/" href="http://www.dinosquad.com/">show</a> was obviously not made for kids her age, but it's so good that the targeted age is easily overlooked in this household. The show is all about her favorite thing: <a data-mce-href="http://dsc.discovery.com/dinosaurs/" href="http://dsc.discovery.com/dinosaurs/">Dinosaurs</a>. It showcases accepting people, whether they're different or not. The show is about teens who turn into dinosaurs because of some primordial ooze accident, and it's pretty much <em><a data-mce-href="http://captainplanetfoundation.org/" href="http://captainplanetfoundation.org/">Captain Planet</a></em> for the new generation. Like <em>Jane and the Dragon</em>, it teaches her to respect everyone, no matter who they are, and to be accountable for her actions. It's focused on helping people and cleaning up the environment. It's geared towards the 7-11 range in my opinion, but it works great for her, and I don't mind watching it between work and household duties. We found it on <a data-mce-href="http://movies.netflix.com/WiHome" href="http://movies.netflix.com/WiHome" target="_blank">Netflix</a>.</div>
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<strong>My Friend Rabbit</strong></div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/my-friend-rabbit.jpg" href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/my-friend-rabbit.jpg"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-thumbnail wp-image-1851" data-mce-src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/my-friend-rabbit-150x150.jpg" height="150" src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/my-friend-rabbit-150x150.jpg" style="border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; float: left;" title="my friend rabbit" width="150" /></a>My daughter has learned so much from this <a data-mce-href="http://www.qubo.com/index.php?path=show&id=6" href="http://www.qubo.com/index.php?path=show&id=6">show</a>, another that I found on <a data-mce-href="http://www.qubo.com/" href="http://www.qubo.com/">Qubo</a>, that I wonder why it isn't easier to find. It has taught her so much about friendship and compromise. She learns all about what animals do in the wild (like bears and their hibernation patterns), how friend's help and understand each other, and how to solve conflict by using her words and not her emotions. I love that it's simple and easily followed, but no so completely dumbed-down that she loses interest and moves onto building "house birds" out of blankets and blocks. Also, it's not <em><a data-mce-href="http://www.angelinaballerina.com" href="http://www.angelinaballerina.com/">Angelina Ballerina</a></em>. That's a huge thumbs-up in its direction. Hop Thinking > Angelina any day in this house!</div>
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<strong>Ruby Gloom</strong></div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/Rubygloom_logo.jpg" href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/Rubygloom_logo.jpg"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-thumbnail wp-image-1852" data-mce-src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/Rubygloom_logo-150x150.jpg" height="150" src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/Rubygloom_logo-150x150.jpg" style="border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; float: left;" title="Rubygloom_logo" width="150" /></a>If I had the talent to draw and animate, I got a wild-hair up my ass to make a cartoon that suited my family's needs one day, and I was from Canada, this would be the <a data-mce-href="http://www.rubygloomtv.com/" href="http://www.rubygloomtv.com/">show</a> I would create. Not only is she completely obsessed with this show, my entire family, right down to my fifty year-old Mom, is. It's fun, quirky, different, and completely relevant, no matter your age. It teaches my toddler everything I could ask it to and more. She appreciates music in every situation, singing as she plays and does her chores.. and bathes, brushes her teeth, etc. She doesn't sweat the small stuff, and tends to grasp the bigger picture, more than any other toddler she's been around. She loves when she meets someone that's a little different from your typical person, and welcomes them into her life with open arms. She also really wants a Venus Flytrap for her birthday, and cannot wait to see the Toggleworm trees bloom and the worms show up. I've even been begged to read Poe to her, and that's like, the coolest thing in the history of forever. Bam! Find this (sadly short-lived) Canadian masterpiece on Netflix. You'll never have to wonder what to watch again.</div>
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<strong>Hello Kitty's Furry Tale Theater</strong></div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/hellokittysfurrytaillogo.jpg" href="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/hellokittysfurrytaillogo.jpg"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-thumbnail wp-image-1853" data-mce-src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/hellokittysfurrytaillogo-150x150.jpg" height="150" src="http://raspwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/hellokittysfurrytaillogo-150x150.jpg" style="border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; float: left;" title="hellokittysfurrytaillogo" width="150" /></a>This show has apparently been around since 1987, which is the year I was born. Had I ever watched until a few months ago? Nope. Do I curse my misspent youth daily for missing out on its awesome qualities? Sure do! It's a well-written remake of classic stories, works of fiction, and movies, all done with <a data-mce-href="http://www.hellokitty.com/plp/hello-kitty/?gclid=CKS_xri-564CFSdgTAodlVb2_g" href="http://www.hellokitty.com/plp/hello-kitty/?gclid=CKS_xri-564CFSdgTAodlVb2_g">Hello Kitty</a> characters. From "KT -- The Kitty Terrestrial" to "Crocodile Penguin", "Cinderkitty" to "Catula", everyone is entertained, without being scared or forced to watch a movie out of their age range. She sits, with rapt attention, glued to the television, in glorious "Mommy can finally get a little work done" silence, for the entire episode. I used to joke that <a data-mce-href="http://spongebob.nick.com/" href="http://spongebob.nick.com/">Spongebob</a> was crack for kids; I digress. Find it on Netflix, or the interwebz, whichever works best for you.</div>
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These are some of our favorite shows, and there isn't a sign or a sigh of <em><a data-mce-href="http://www.nickjr.com/dora-the-explorer/" href="http://www.nickjr.com/dora-the-explorer/">Dora the Explorer</a></em> anywhere to be found. In the famous words of Madea: Hallelujer!</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-61346076430362175862012-03-26T12:17:00.000-04:002012-03-26T12:17:12.499-04:00Are You Drawing Something?<br />
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I finally jumped on the bandwagon and downloaded <a data-mce-href="https://www.facebook.com/playdrawsomething" href="https://www.facebook.com/playdrawsomething" target="_blank">Draw Something</a>. I tried to get the paid version, but, apparently the <a data-mce-href="https://play.google.com/store?hl=en" href="https://play.google.com/store?hl=en" target="_blank">Google Market</a> hates me, so I had to settle for the free version. I bugged a couple of friends (who <span data-mce-style="color: #000000;"><del style="color: red;">dearly love </del></span>hate me) to play, and got down to business.</div>
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OHMYGOD! I can't draw. At all. In any situation. It's terrible. But this game? It's so much fun! I am mighty with my stick figures, let me tell you. I can't believe I waited so long to grab this app. It's quickly becoming my favorite game, and I've only had it for an hour or so. I am having a blast trying to draw things like an Ewok, sideburns, justice, Norway, <a data-mce-href="http://www.adele.tv/" href="http://www.adele.tv/" target="_blank">Adele</a> -- and most of the time, people are getting it. How, exactly, people are getting it, I will never know.</div>
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Unfortunately, just like with any other app, there are pros and cons. I say unfortunately, because I really hate the cons on Draw Something. Like I said, I haven't been playing long, but I can spot the good and the bad. I've seen what my friends and their friends are saying on Twitter, Facebook, Google +, etc. I can read the reviews on the <a data-mce-href="https://play.google.com/store?hl=en" href="https://play.google.com/store?hl=en" target="_blank">Google Market</a>. In the name of coughcough<em>research</em>coughcough, I've compiled a quick list for your reading pleasure. Do not let this deter you from downloading and fully enjoying this app on either your <a data-mce-href="http://www.android.com/" href="http://www.android.com/" target="_blank">Android</a> device or your <a data-mce-href="http://www.apple.com" href="http://www.apple.com/" target="_blank">Apple</a> device. It's well worth all the cons!</div>
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<strong>Pros of Draw Something</strong></div>
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<li>Fun. Fun fun fun FUN fun! You can play with all your friends, across platforms, and have a blast. You can find your <a data-mce-href="http://www.facebook.com" href="http://www.facebook.com/" target="_blank">Facebook</a> friends, email contacts, or search by username. I'm not sure of the limit of games you can have at a time, but I've got seven going, and it doesn't seem to mind adding more.</li>
<li>You can get the free version or the (ad-free) paid version ($0.99). I want to get the paid version ASAP, and I have been assured by the email they sent me that when I do, all my games and friends and contacts will carry over. I won't skip a beat, and I won't have to deal with those pesky -- yet few and far between -- ads.</li>
<li>Multiple line sizes, eraser sizes, color packs, BOMBS!, and lots of other neat features, make for a pretty easy time drawing up or guessing something. Now, I've heard a lot of people call it cheating when others draw on their tablets (Android powered or <a data-mce-href="http://store.apple.com/us/browse/home/shop_ipad/family/ipad?afid=p219%7CGOUS&cid=AOS-US-KWG" href="http://store.apple.com/us/browse/home/shop_ipad/family/ipad?afid=p219%7CGOUS&cid=AOS-US-KWG" target="_blank">iPad</a>), or use a stylus. I don't see it as cheating. I have a rather large-screened phone, so it's pretty easy for me to make something that resembles what I've been told to draw. Does that mean I'm cheating? Nope. It means I've got a big ass phone, and if I had a small one, my stuff would probably suck just as much. So, enough of that already!</li>
<li>Fun things to draw always make for a good game. You can pick from the Easy, Medium, or Hard topic listed, and earn coins to buy bombs and color packs (I think.. more research is needed on color packs). You earn one, two, or three, depending on which difficulty you or your opponent choose, for each correct guess.</li>
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<strong>Cons of Draw Something</strong></div>
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<li><a data-mce-href="http://forums.omgpop.com/draw-something/11852-draw-something-frequently-asked-questions.html" href="http://forums.omgpop.com/draw-something/11852-draw-something-frequently-asked-questions.html" target="_blank">WHERE ARE THE NOTIFICATIONS</a>?! Seriously. You have to either keep the game open, and wait forever for it to refresh, or keep constantly opening and closing it to check on your open games. No me gusta meme face here. It drains my battery like crazy, and annoys me to no end. This will annoy me more when I grab the paid version. If I'm paying for it, I want notifications, son! I guess Apple users have notifications, but what about us Android folks? COME ON ALREADY!</li>
<li>You can't find friends from any social network but Facebook. Most of my friends are there, but some aren't. Actually, I try to stay away from Facebook as much as possible. I'm more of a <a data-mce-href="http://www.twitter.com" href="http://www.twitter.com/" target="_blank">Twitter</a> and <a data-mce-href="https://plus.google.com" href="https://plus.google.com/" target="_blank">Google +</a> girl. I would love to add my Twitter friends without having to wait for them to tell me their username. That could take days, I tell you! DAYS! I don't want to wait. I want to force them into a game where I perfectly draw an Autobot symbol without so much as thinking twice, and then do the same thing with an Ewok. Oh, God. I'm such a nerd. I need to do a quick check for lady parts, because I obviously lost them somewhere.........okay, we're good! Carry on!</li>
<li>You have to draw A LOT to get enough coins to do anything. You can buy them, but why do that when free is so much better. It's like a rewards system for broke people. I still don't have to like it...</li>
<li>The colors they start you out with should include things like green, pink, brown, and grey. You only get red, black, yellow, and blue. There should be a few more to help you along. I swear, my friend could've saved me 20 minutes of scratching my head if he had just had some green or grey. Though, props to him for drawing the closing scene of the season two finale from The Walking Dead. Prison. He's so clever!</li>
<li>It doesn't seem to be possible to look back at what you've drawn. I really hate that, because I want to screen-cap my Autobot symbol and my interpretations of Adele and Eminem. I mean, come on, this isn't at all feasible? LET ME GO BACK AND CHECK MY SKILLS OUT!</li>
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All-in-all, I don't have much to complain about; it's a great app. It runs smooth, it looks nice, the concept is solid, and lots of fun, and there has been one ad in the few hours I've been playing. I don't feel the need to buy the paid version for any other reason than to support the developers so when I whine that I want changes, I can rub in the fact that I PAID TO WHINE. I have had so much fun playing a silent version of Pictionary with my friends, and I can't wait to really dive in. I highly suggest this app to all, and if you get it, join me for a game!</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-4888439320424933222012-03-19T13:15:00.000-04:002012-03-26T12:24:31.631-04:00To Your Unborn Children And My Already Born OneHave you seen this?<br />
<br />
<a href="http://storify.com/homophobes/100-homophobes-who-would-kill-their-gay-child" target="_blank">100 REAL Tweets From People Who Would Murder Their Gay Children</a><br />
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If you haven't, please take a moment to browse. This blog can wait.<br />
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Now, if you have Tumblr, there's a nice little image to go with it. The people that compiled the list are amazing, and I applaud them for getting this out there.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m0v0sn3tih1qacar6o1_500.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m0v0sn3tih1qacar6o1_500.png" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Yay Homophobes! Fucking dicks.</td></tr>
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Isn't this nice? I wish my parents had been like this when I was born, right? Oh, wait, they were. <br />
<a name='more'></a>My Mom has always supported me, no matter her personal beliefs, and she's a complete LGBT supporter now. She loves everyone the same, and sees nothing wrong with love.<br />
<br />
That's right, I didn't say "gay love" or "same-sex love". I said love. Because that's what it is, no matter your race, social status, bank account, country, city, state, intelligence level, or gender. Love. Is. Love. Whether you believe in equality or not, love is simply love. It doesn't discriminate, no matter what YOU PERSONALLY believe. Love isn't a person, you see. It's not a thing, an object.. it's a feeling. And feelings can't be measured the same way as people and things. You can't police feelings, emotions, or reactions. They're things that happen outside your control.<br />
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With that being said, I think we all know how I feel about these people and what they've chosen to tweet when the hashtag, #ToMyUnbornChild, started trending on Twitter. I think it's atrocious. I think it's disgusting. I think it's the worst fucking thing you could ever say to a child you plan to bring into this world.<br />
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I will support my child, no matter what she does. Hell, she could become a fucking drug addict, and I would find a way to help her overcome it. No one helped me, so I would never wish suffering like I experienced on my kid. I will always be there for her. If she chooses to find love, I hope that it's real and it's true, and she gets to have everything I have with her. If she chooses adoption, I will love that kid like she pushed for 4 days straight to have it. It will be my grandchild, and I will fight for it, love it, lose my shit on it, and come through for it, just like I have for my daughter.<br />
<br />
But, I know that not everyone feels this way, and it breaks my heart. To think that children will grow up having to hide who they are from their parents, and society, and never experience being themselves until they're grown, and maybe not even then, rips me apart. How could you wish any kind of preventable hardship on your child? Your kid didn't ask to be here, you brought them into this fucked up world. You should be willing to do WHATEVER IT TAKES to give them the life they deserve.<br />
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They're going to face enough judgement without fearing it/getting it from you. SHAME ON YOU.<br />
<br />
So, here's a letter to my daughter. My beautiful, intelligent, rage-inducing, perfect little girl, without whom, my life would suck and hold no purpose. I really hope she reads it one day, and realizes how much she means to me, and how proud of her I already am.<br />
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Dear Araelynn,<br />
<br />
Let's start with your name, a name that I am just now sharing with my readers, which will soon include you. Your name, Araelynn Ruedell, is perfect for you. You're nerdy and awesome, just like your Momma (me, yay), so your first name suits you. I'm sorry that you'll never find a personalized item in a store with it, but you'll come to thank me later. Your middle name? It's also perfect. You remind me so much of the woman I loved more than life itself. Your great-grandmother was the most amazing woman to ever walk the face of the earth, and you carry her attitude, gestures, and smile, without ever having the chance to meet her. I believe she's somewhere, shaking her fist at the crazy shit you pull, every single day. I couldn't have picked a better name for you, and I'm thankful that your Daddy had a hand in it as well (he picked your first name, because he's a closet nerd, don't think he isn't). I don't care who got their feelings hurt, you deserve to be named after someone you can be proud of. Ms. Ida Ruedell was the one woman that deserved to live on, even after she packed up and moved to the afterlife.<br />
<br />
Now, you're three years old today. I just turned twenty-five, and boy, am I a mess. My life is so fucked up, it's pathetic. I'm no where near where I planned to be by now, but I have you. I am so thankful for you, little hellion. Your smile lights up the room, your attitude drives me insane, you don't listen, you live in your own little world, and I lose my shit daily. It's okay, though, because I've never met a child as intelligent and aware as you. Without you, I would've killed myself a long time ago. Let's be honest, your Momma has a lot of issues. I gave you some of them, and for that, I extend my sincere apologies (OCD is a bitch, kiddo). I hope you don't turn out like me, because I have enough scars for the both of us. I don't ever want you to hurt yourself, not even for a second. It's no way to live.<br />
<br />
You're going to turn four in a couple of months. You'll be starting school this year, and you're already brushing up on your alphabet, typical kid songs, and even some things they won't teach you in school. You're so smart.. so very smart. You amaze me every single day. I realize that half the time, I'm fussing at you, but it's not because I don't love you.<br />
<br />
I fuss at you because I've come to expect more from you. You show me how deep your understanding of the world is, and how much you know, every day. I expect more from you, because I don't ever want you to stop learning and growing and striving. When you throw a fit over what show to watch, I know there's another reason. You're not one to tantrum out over something so small, so when you won't tell me what's really on your mind, I get frustrated. Don't ever feel like you can't talk to me, because when you do, I know you still trust me to be the best I can be for you every step of the way.<br />
<br />
Speaking of, oh my GOD child. You can make me lose it faster than your Dad, and that's a special skill. I know it's not your fault that you've been taught to say/do mean/hurtful things by people that should be ashamed of themselves, but sometimes it gets the best of me. I'm sorry that I can't hold it together more, but I just get so mad. It's not that I'm mad at you, I'm just mad that people can't act right and be adults. They use you as a tool to hurt others, mainly me. I hope that when you get older, you'll see these people for who they really are, and you can tell them exactly what you think of someone who would teach you to call me "mean lady" instead of "Mommy", to tell me you hate me and that I don't love you. I'll always be your Mommy, baby, and no one will ever change that. I will ALWAYS love you, more than those people can ever comprehend. You are the reason I strive to do whatever it takes to give you the best life possible.<br />
<br />
As I sit here and think of all the things I want you to know, I find myself at a loss. This would have to be a twenty page letter for me to explain everything to you, and I really only started it to tell you one thing:<br />
<br />
No matter what you do in life, I will ALWAYS stand beside you. I will ALWAYS be proud of you. I will ALWAYS support you. I will ALWAYS love you.<br />
<br />
If you choose to be a college drop-out who works at McDonald's and lives in a crappy-ass apartment, while I will encourage you to go back and finish what you started and make a better life for yourself, I will support you. I will NEVER call you a failure.<br />
<br />
If you choose to move on to bigger and better things, and leave all thoughts of me behind, I will still be right here, telling everyone how proud I am of you, and how much I love you and respect the adult you've become. It will break my heart, and I will probably be a crying mess most of the time, but it will never change my love or devotion for/to you. I will just be proud to know that you're out there making your dreams come true, because it's something that I've been scared to do my whole life. I will never ask you to give your life up for me. Ever.<br />
<br />
If you should so happen to fall into a bad situation, and fight me for trying to help you out, I will KEEP FIGHTING. ALWAYS. I will never stop, not even for a second. I will NEVER give up on you. Drugs, abuse, whatever -- I won't care. As long as I have a dollar to my name, and the ability to open my big fat mouth, I will do anything and everything to help you. I promise. No one helped me, no one cared. Someone will always care about you, and someone will always be there to help you, even if you don't want it. That someone will be ME. I will always be a phone call, drive, text, email, or shoulder, away. You need only ask. There will be times when I make you fight your own battles, live with your own choices, and make your own way, but I will always be there if you need me. No one can go it alone forever, and no one should have to.<br />
<br />
If you marry the love of your life, male or female, I hope you have the best marriage possible. I will support you, and love the shit out of your spouse. If they're not good enough for you, I guess I will be honest and tell them exactly what I think, but I will NEVER hurt them the way I've been hurt. I will never treat them any differently than I would you. YOU choose who you love, not me; not your Dad, your grandparents, or your next door neighbor. It's up to YOU to decide who you want to spend your life with, and I will just be thankful that you found someone you want to share your life with.<br />
<br />
If you have kids, be them biological or adopted, they will light my life up, just as you have. I will love them, spoil them, lose my shit on them, and help them, just as I have done for you. I know you will make an amazing parent to any child. I've had my good moments and my bad with you, but I hope the love I try to show you has had an impact. Just remember, your kids didn't ask to be here, or be your kids. You had or adopted them, so it's up to you to give them the best life possible, and love them no matter what.<br />
<br />
I have seen some disturbing things, lately. Politicians trying to take away basic rights, marriage going down the toilet because no one seems to think "gay marriage" is acceptable, and people telling their unborn children they'll set them on fire and beat them to death if they're "homo". I pray that you will never have to go through any of this, no matter what you choose in life.<br />
<br />
If you turn out "gay", I will be over-the-moon happy for you. If you're "bi", like me, I'll be over-the-moon happy for you. If you're "straight", I will be over-the-moon happy for you. Are you seeing a pattern? NEVER hide who you are from me. Never feel like a loser or a failure or an outcast. I will love and support you for knowing and finding love. Always.<br />
<br />
I hope there are plenty of care-free and innocent years ahead of you, but if there aren't, I hope you know that I will always be there for you, and always be proud of the little girl I carried for nine months and a week, sat in labor for two days, and brought into this world. You are always telling me that I'm your best friend, and I hope you never stop. I will always be your parent first, giving you discipline, boundaries, and guidelines, but if I'm still your friend at the end of the day, that's cool, too. It'll make me happy to know that you love me and appreciate all I'm trying to do to help you become the best person you can be.<br />
<br />
Also, please try and remember that it's annoying when you ignore me. That shit is driving me crazy. If we communicate, everyone is getting a better experience. If you listen, we're both happy, and we can come to agreements faster, without all the stomping and yelling and hurt feelings.. on both sides.<br />
<br />
I love you, and I always will,<br />
<br />
MomAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-11433929547843680392012-03-13T16:08:00.000-04:002012-03-13T16:20:12.237-04:00Extreme Spousing, Impending Birthday Doom, And Plagiarism Anger 101 -- RTTRI'm going to turn the big ol' two-five on Thursday. I feel so much older than that. I know it's not really that old, but I've been through so much in the past ten years, that it just feels like it's been twenty. I'm already getting grey hair, I've got wrinkles and saggy skin in places, and my life is far from where I thought it would be. I'm getting there, but not exactly as fast as I always dreamed I would.<br />
<br />
With a myriad of schooling and relationships, health scares and parenting/marriage woes, it seems far more reasonable to say that I'm turning 40. I'm not, but again, it feels like I am. Also, after twenty-four consecutively atrocious birthdays, I'm awaiting a twenty-fifth. It's kind-of like when I was 21, pregnant and waiting by the phone because my fiance was deployed, and I ended up spending most of the day in my uncle's basement. You see, there were TORNADOES. ON MY BIRTHDAY. OH FUCK ME.<br />
<br />
I hate my birthday, and not just because half of my family refers to me as "the bad luck baby":<br />
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<br />
<ul>
<li>Fourth grade, skating rink party, three injuries. Also, someone sneezed on my custom cake. Fucker. </li>
<li>Ninth grade, first girlfriend dumped me because I wouldn't "come out". Well, at thirteen, I was barely old enough to understand what I was going through, much less tell my super christian friends and family that I was dating a fifteen year-old chick who couldn't kiss worth a shit. </li>
<li>Twenty-two (or was it twenty-three), Husband decided that his friends (that really only want to be his friend when it's convenient for them) were far more important than me. I spent the whole day (and night) crying on the vacation HE wanted to take, and then when he tried to "make it up to me", he stood me up in one of the fanciest restaurants I've ever been to, and an older (and completely awesome) gay couple decided to get me wasted to forget about him and his meanness. I was in a city where I knew practically no one, in a bar where it costs half a day's pay to get a drink, alone. It was sad.</li>
<li>Last year, same thing, only this time, I was called a whore in front of my child, for no reason whatsoever, by someone old enough to know better. Also, no one remembered it was my birthday, except on Facebook, and I don't really remember much about it, because I was in class, taking a test. I aced that bitch, too. I also worked that day. Bam. Adulthood. </li>
</ul>
And that's only a few of the many reasons I hate my birthday. Let's move on, shall we?<br />
<br />
I've created a new extreme sport.. or television show. Whichever comes first. Just remember, you saw this HERE first, so let's give me a pat for thinking it up. I'll remember the little people when I'm accepting a shitty daytime television award.<br />
<br />
EXTREME SPOUSING! ::cues crazy gruff voice and "extreme" musical score::<br />
<br />
It's where you and your spouse seem to have the most EXTREME.. ly hardcore arguments over completely asinine issues that should really be deemed "moot".. ALL OF THE TIMES. Like, television volume while people who work third shift in the house are sleeping, and you're trying to work, and SHIT IS GETTING REAL. Or, like putting in job applications, holding up a part of a pretty important agreement, etc.<br />
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Instead of getting pissed and using your big growed-up words, like civilized normal couples, you can come on my show, or whoever decides to pick it up, and go at LEAST Super Saiyan 3 on each other. It's fun and entertainment for the audience, gets out pent-up aggression out for the couple, and it's easier than therapy.<br />
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I need this show to start NOW. Like, RIGHT NOW. I'm not too proud to admit that, like most young-<i>ish </i>couples who started out their relationship under difficult circumstances, we fight. A lot. A whole fucking lot. It's getting tiresome, with both parties feeling drained and defeated at the end of the day. I am an adult, but sometimes, I fight like a stupid teen. I married someone who's every inch an alpha personality, like myself, so we know exactly what buttons to push to get each other to act completely stupid.<br />
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It would be fun to beat the shit out of him with a giant Q-Tip, but that's neither here nor there.<br />
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Moving on again.. Whooooosh!<br />
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The interweb.. it's a funny place, right? Last week, we talked about the crazy antics ensuing over there at that Chrysler Blogger Face-off thing. This week, we tune in and learn that the same party responsible has been called-out for plagiarism. Age, and pregnancy, are used as an excuse for said stealing, and it makes me really, REALLY, fucking crazy-mad.<br />
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I'm about to be twenty-five, which means I'm TWO years YOUNGER than her. I've never stolen someone else's work. I learned at an early age just how detrimental that can be. I've been falsely accused of stealing someone's printed off the internet article to use for an assignment, and that was bad enough. Thanks to her bad day, I had a big ol' fat dose of Saturday School, and a large stain on my record. It was expunged, but still. It's a serious issue, that there stealing thing.<br />
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I know better, and I'm ashamed to be lumped into a now pretty general class of "age equals stupidity" and "excuses, excuses". I have somehow managed to come up with my own shit, pregnant or not, young or not, for years. It's not easy, and it's especially difficult to make something your own in the digital age. Everyone has already said everything there is to say. Which makes and breaks a good blogger/writer. It makes ME better, personally, and quite obviously it has broken her. Quit instead of stealing. You'll get more respect.<br />
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If it's your JOB to write, whether you're good at it or not, you should at least make an effort to be original. Now, with that being said, I would like to clear the air. Not all twenty-something bloggers are a disgrace. There are just a few out there, that think they're invincible. I'm sorry on their behalf, and I hope that those of us that are honest and love what we do aren't going to end up with faces full of mud from this fiasco.<br />
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I have had my fair share of stealing and copying in my graphics business. I've even had to go as far as to get a cease and desist against a large corporation for stealing a damn Christmas card design when a customer decided to go with them, rather than the local business that I normally referred all my clients to for printing. She did so to save a few bucks, but it cost me my salary for a month and a lot of time and clients. Thanks for that, again. You know who you are. I know you're reading this. I should've billed you the five grand I shelled out/lost because of you.<br />
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Just CITE. Please. Cite, give credit, whatever it takes. It doesn't take any more time than going somewhere and stealing the work. I have done it a thousand times. If you've ever written a research paper, you should know all about proper citation, and several of the accepted methods of doing so.<br />
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The blog posts and websites I read and referenced to (about both crazy issues) will be listed at the end of this post. There is the actual Chrysler contest page, the awesome Avitable's blog where he defends and explains the mess to perfection, and the post over at the wonderful Amalah site that explains the thievery.<br />
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Now, I know this is incoherent at best, and scattered, but it's RANDOM TUESDAY. Also, family is driving me insane today, and I'm having trouble remembering what I want to write for work, much less this blog post. There. Excuses. I'm using them. It's my right as a YOUNG BLOGGER PARENT, right? See what I did there? LULZ of the day for me.<br />
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Head on over to <a href="http://www.stacysrandomthoughts.com/">Stacy's</a> awesome blog to link up to the randomness this Tuesday. Happy reading, y'all!<br />
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<a href="http://www.amalah.com/amalah/2012/03/to-whom-it-may-concern.html">Amalah's Blog Post</a><br />
<a href="http://www.avitable.com/2012/03/06/how-to-fail-at-running-a-contest-and-how-to-treat-bloggers-poorly-by-chrysler-and-ignite-social-media/">Avitable's Awesome Blog Post</a><br />
<a href="http://blog.chrysler.com/blogger-faceoff/?ism=EEFeb1412Twitter2">The Start of the Chrysler/Ignite SM Fiasco</a><br />
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There were others, but we all know Kristine, from <a href="http://www.waitinthevan.com/">Wait In The Van</a>, and I'm not even giving the actual blog in question the time of day. Views only keep her in paid gigs, and it's sad. So very, very sad.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-24021652506516515112012-03-11T19:57:00.000-04:002012-03-11T19:57:15.540-04:00Home Run Inn Frozen Pizzas: A Review*Since I joined this whole Klout mess to get free stuff, I've received several perks that I enjoyed. An awesome screen cleaner, several early-access codes to start ups that I can check out and use before the hype, several codes to websites (hey free money!), etc. It's been a generally interesting experience, though them telling me I earned a perk AFTER it's full isn't cool, I'm just sayin'.<br />
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I got the Home Run Inn frozen pizza perk, and was stoked. A free meal for my ridiculously hungry family. Score. I'm broke, so this was like a gift from the heavens above. The pack came, and inside was a folder FULL of information on the company, the coupons for two free pizzas of my choosing, and a really awesome pizza cutter.<br />
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I LOVE the pizza cutter. I got the pack about a month and a half ago, and I've used it over every other one in the house. It's also really amazing (to me AND everyone else in the house) that you can take it apart and get it completely clean.<br />
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We finally got around to getting the pizzas yesterday. We were told that they were only sold in our area at Ingles and Publix. Publix is hours away, and Ingles is farther than I care to drive, even for free pizza. And then, what a crazy, random happenstance! We found them at the local Bi-Lo. The variety was limited, but the two family favs were there, so we grabbed a Classic Pepperoni and a Classic Cheese.<br />
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When I opened the package, I was a bit confused, to be totally honest. The cheese has already been baked.. I was completely skeptical that twice-baked cheese would be any good. I popped them in, cooked them, and tossed a salad on the table. Supper time! Ding ding!<br />
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We all sat down, and the adults (because my toddler could care less what it tastes like, as long as it's pizza) went to tasting. I love that my family will pretty much do anything I ask them to when I tell them it's for my blog.<br />
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Here are the reviews of four normal people (who usually either eat homemade pizzas, or the cheapest frozen one I can find that doesn't look like cardboard. It all depends on time and how broke I am that paycheck.):<br />
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<ul>
<li>Now, my husband is a completely picky eater. He was raised on fast food, and anything that comes in a package. He loved it. He said it reminded him of Johnny's Pizza, which is based out of select cities in Louisiana. He didn't care for the pepperoni, because it's bland. I think he's just so used to processed pepperoni, that he has no idea what uncured slices taste like. He said he would prefer it over every other frozen pizza AND Pizza Hut, Papa John's, and Domino's (Is that how you spell it? Whatever.). HRI has scored a fan with him, and that's not easy.</li>
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<li>My Mom likes it. She likes the crust, and the fact that the cheese tasted like black olives on certain parts of the pepperoni pizza. It's not her favourite brand, and she definitely wouldn't pay $7-$9 for one, but she said it was really good. </li>
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<li>Kiddo was just happy to have pizza, but she seemed to eat the crust without as much fuss. That's always nice.</li>
</ul>
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<ul>
<li>My opinion is a little more critical, because I'M JUST LIKE THAT, OKAY?! I found it off-putting that parts of the pepperoni pizza's cheese tasted like canned black olives. I'm not a fan of them at all. The sauce was a little sweet for my taste, because I like spicier marinas. The cheese pizza was okay, but I'm not into the twice-baked cheese. It was really chewy, and lost a lot of it's flavour. The crust was probably the only thing I liked about it, and to be honest, I've had better wheat crust. I know that it's probably a great pizza when you get it fresh from the actual franchise, and maybe another variety would've suited me better, but even though it's a frozen pizza, I was left lacking. So much so, that I took a couple of bites of each kind, and was more content to eat my salad. I hate to be overly-critical, but that's my honest opinion of it. Three outta four ain't bad, right? I definitely wouldn't spend the money to buy THIS particular pizza. I will be sticking with the same old, same old. If they happen to have them on sale, I would probably buy them so the rest of my family could have them, but I'd be sticking with the rabbit food I throw on the table to make myself feel like less of a crappy parent.</li>
</ul>
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So, that's that. Two pizzas, total value $15.98 normally(sans tax), on sale this week for $11.98(again, tax not included, mostly because I'm lazy), and with the coupons provided, free.<br />
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Also, I don't agree with Huband. They taste nothing like Johnny's.<br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #5b5b5b; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 14px;">*I was given a free product or sample because I'm a Klout influencer. I was under no obligation to receive the sample or talk about this company. I get no additional benefits for talking about the product or company.</span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-83605411742592963322012-03-06T11:46:00.002-05:002012-03-07T00:01:11.853-05:00Too Much Coffee, People Who Skipped Grammar In School, And Cyber Stupidity -- RTTRI've been hard at work lately, doing research and reading tons of resumes. By research, I mean playing the shit out of Fable III, Halo Reach, and Halo ODST. Throwback to some great games wut?! Yes. I have an awesome friend who let me borrow his old school first gen 360, and I'm banging out an article that's going to take a lot of patience to write.<br />
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Also, if anyone wants to donate to the game fun, I'll give you my paypal. I'm spending all my money on bills and coffee these days, and I can't afford the ridiculous prices for games.. they used to be necessities, but then I had a family and a kid and responsibilities. OMFG. WHEN DID I GROW UP? HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?! ::shakes fist angrily towards the sky::<br />
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Speaking of coffee, I'm up to a $30/week budget for that shit. It's insane. I'm killing my insides. It's totally cool, though, because I enjoy killing my organs with black gold. Well, more like, caramel gold.. I like coffee creamer and sugar in my coffee.<br />
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I've had this stupid hair stuck in my eye for FOUR FUCKING DAYS NOW. It's not cool. My eyeball is raw. How does that even work?! It just does. There's your answer. It's in that unreachable top crease, and it's driving me insane. Not that I really need any help, but it's a helpful motherfucker. Touche, hair stuck in my eye, touche. I don't know how to make the little accent thing on the top of the "e", so get over it already.<br />
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I hate to call-out bad grammar (well, not really, but this time I kind-of do.. maybe.. probably not. Whatevs.), but I have to say this to everyone that wants to be a writer:<br />
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Everyone makes mistakes. It's learning to correct your mistakes, and better yourself that makes you a good writer. When you balk at the notion, it tells me you're not a writer, you're simply someone who wants to seem deep and interesting. Get a beret, or something, but please don't harp on how awesome your shit is. When you can't even discern the STARK difference in "your" and "you're", and you make no never mind about it, it annoys me.<br />
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If your resume has more grammatical errors than a kindergartner's poetry, you look like an idiot. If your blog posts are so incoherent that I can't even grasp the topic you've chosen to write about, you look completely incompetent. I'm not going to give you the time of day.<br />
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I know I'm not perfect, but I choose to use ellipses like they're going out of style. I know the right and wrong way to use commas, but sometimes, I choose to splice shit up FOR THE EFFECT. Like, how it would sound if I said it. SO THERE. FUCK YOU. CAPS!<br />
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This week, I'm ashamed to own a Chrysler vehicle. One of my most favourite people on the interwebz was in a contest, and was banging out the hilarity in her quest for votes. I enjoyed her not taking herself so seriously, and having fun with the process.<br />
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She got disqualified. Another contestant got upset that she was losing (because obvs she's internet famous and awesome, but OMFG EVERYONE IS MISSING IT WHAT DO I DO?!), and lost her sense of humor. She set her husband loose on the Twitterverse, and he said some pretty nasty things to this awesome lady that was just trying to have fun, as well as some of her interweb supporters/friends.<br />
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IT GETS BETTER!<br />
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She the decided to write a completely terrible blog post about said person, slandering and bullying her. She set her "fans" after her and her readers, and she made all kinds of false accusations. This, in itself, was enough to make me pretty peeved, I'm not going to lie.<br />
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THEN! as if this wasn't enough! she contacted Chrysler and made a big stink, leaving out all the nasty things on her side that weren't all in good fun and humor, and Chrysler. backed. her. up. y'all.<br />
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Chrysler promotes cyber bullying. I say that with complete conviction. I know what's right, and what's completely wrong, and I also know THAT I AM A REAL PERSON AND SO ARE MY FRIENDS AND YOU CAN SUCK A NUT! I don't make friendly-time with proxy servers and cheaters, because I only make friends with people who can hug it the fuck out.<br />
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When has a proxy server or a cheater ever had the capability to give a fucking AMAZING hug? Nevah!<br />
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What I'm really saying here, through all my weird hilarity, is that the real bully is the man who threatens a woman, or anyone else, on the internet. The bully and the cheater isn't the person who made jokes and did what she always does, it was the person who stooped to petty and childish tactics.<br />
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I have been internet harassed, and it was awful. It made me a wreck, and hurt more than I can describe. It wasn't over a contest, it was over something that happened in the realz, but it was carried to the internet, and I was threatened, my child was harmed, and my husband's career was threatened. It was the worst time of my life, and it's still going on, because petty fucking people have nothing better to do with their time.<br />
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I've learned to let it go, but it still hurts. It's still wrong, and to see a power company ENDORSE THE SHIT pisses me off to no end. Like, pisses me off more than when my husband decides to be a fucking dick all day and treat me like I'm an idiot because I have a vag. That, my friendly readers, is a whole fucking lot.<br />
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I voted for her, because her contributions were awesome, and so is she. I didn't cheat, I didn't vote for the stupid iPad 2 (that CHRYSLER was BLATANTLY using for incentive votes), or the cookies (which WERE JUST A FUCKING JOKE OMFG), or for any other reason than I loved her shit, so. hard., and I love reading her blog, also so. hard.<br />
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So, there. Fuckity-fuck-fucker. Now I think I have it off my chest, I'm going to shit-talk my Jeep because ITS PARENT IS RIDICULOUS. It should've been adopted. I'm just glad I didn't buy it from a dealer, because technically I didn't pay them for it. I paid the dude who did a craptastic job of restoring it.<br />
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This, my friends, ends Random Tuesday Thoughts. It has a whole 'lotta rebellion in it. Enjoy the rest of your week, awesome people, and remember to head on over to <a href="http://www.stacysrandomthoughts.com/">Stacy's</a> awesome blog and link up to the fun.<br />
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I'm not adding the linky thing today, mostly because I'm lazy as shit, but also it's over there -----> on the side of my blog. Have fun, and rebel on!<br />
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UPDATE TIME BITCHES!<br />
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So, there's this guy, and he's pretty much fucking awesome. He wrote this blog post about all the Chrysler Blogger Face-Off shit, and it's perfection.<br />
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Go <a href="http://www.avitable.com/2012/03/06/how-to-fail-at-running-a-contest-and-how-to-treat-bloggers-poorly-by-chrysler-and-ignite-social-media/">HERE</a>, and enjoy.<br />
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Also, I realize that it was Ignite Social Media that made the wrong decision, but CHRYSLER BACKED THEM UP. Obviously. The shit is still going on.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5512726896971746986.post-68426393677620450682012-02-28T09:09:00.001-05:002012-02-28T09:14:56.746-05:00Bad TV, Awkward Situations, Gas Stations, And A Jeep With A Grudge -- RTTRAt this moment in time, I'm procrastinating work, because I feel like crap. I've had a perpetual cold for a month now. It's driving me insane. It's cold outside, and supposedly it's hot in the house. I feel like I'm chilling in Greenland, though, and I can't breathe out of my nose. I figured I'd actually post my Tuesday blog a little earlier than Tuesday night, almost Wednesday. Sounded like a good plan at the time, but now I'm stuck watching The Voice. Wow. This is worse than Idol, but with better judges fights. Well, mentors? What do you call them? Button Guardians? Whatever.. this is bad. And I'm kind-of mad that I can't just watch something I DVR'd last week and never got around to.<br />
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My gorgeous Jeep is running again. And since Husband decided to drive it to work today, he has to put gas in it. BAM! I dodged the bullet on that one. It took me an hour, but she's not parked anymore, and that makes me happy. Now if I could just convince Husband to sell his crappy car in favor of something he can actually use, we'd be set.<br />
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I went to the gas station yesterday, and I wore my awesome RAVN shirt. It got a couple of app downloads for the dudes behind the badassery, and I ended up ruining my workout jacket. Also, they were out of Dr. Pepper. WHO DOES THAT?! I was sad panda for sure.<br />
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So, I know I'm awkward, but sometimes, the situations I find myself in, are too awkward to be all me. Does that make sense? I found myself trying to explain bootstrapping and Venture Capitalists to my Mom, and the ensuing conversation was just.. I don't know.. confusing at best?<br />
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And I just watched big momma almost take Carson Daly down. My life is complete. Totally just messed up my train of thought. I'm done for this Tuesday. Tune in next week for, hopefully, a more exciting post. With less Button Guardians.<br />
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Omg. Country music is singing stories? I thought it was singing A STORY, over and over.. okay, for real, I'm done. Stupid show.<br />
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<a href="http://stacyuncorked.com/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" target="_blank"><img alt="Stacy" height="187" rebel="" src="http://stacysrandomthoughts.com/Files/randomtuesday.jpg" uncorked="" width="225" /></a></div>
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Head on over to <a href="http://www.stacysrandomthoughts.com/">Stacy's</a>, grab a button, and link to the fun. Rebellion is best served with an awkward blog post that makes no sense, didn't you know?Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11179012533778101261noreply@blogger.com6